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  1. #1
    butterface's Avatar
    butterface is offline Banned
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    Best way to get chicks.

    I was at a company part friday night at the end of a week long meeting and there were tons and tons and tons of hot chicks there from all over the US. There were all doing karaoke and people were sitting there doing nothing or singing well but just standing there or just singing bad. So I got up and got the hottest girl to come up to the stage with me and stand there as my prop. Then I begun to sing the most melodramtic version of The Police - Every breath you take. I looked in her eyes and sung it and acted like I was crying and then was slowly unbuttoning my shirt button and getting ont he ground and putting on a great show. The crowd was going absolutlely wild and at the end of the song where you just keep repeating I'll be watching you, I'll be watching you, I'll be watching you everyone was cheering at the top of their lungs and about 10 of my co-workers from my office had lined up in front of me during the last few seconds of the song and were on their knees bowing down and worshipping as a goof it was hilarous. As soon as I got off about 10 chicks ran up to me and thew $bills at me and then I had girls coming up to me introducting me as if they knew me and I never knew who they were. I went from no one knowing me to everyone wanting to know me. Now the head boss knows who I am so I will most probably be on their list of people to watch for promotions to upper management. Later on everyone was yelling for me to do an encore so I lined up 5 of the hottest chicks I could find as back up dancers and did a dance version of I'm too sexy by right said fred. Everyone was going crazy at this point and cheering. After that I had girls coming up to me left and right saying bye and what club they are going to be at for the afterparty. When I got to the club they all ran up to me and I was dancing all night. Man now I know why music entertainment stars get laid so much.

  2. #2
    Beernutz's Avatar
    Beernutz is offline Member
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    music is the key to a womens soul....or some gay $hit like that

  3. #3
    Prime's Avatar
    Prime is offline Naturally perfect
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    I did the same number (im too sexy) and it went down like a drowing kitten tied to a rock! I was working for a language school last year looking after kids and we had to sing kareoke to get them doing it one evening. Well i cant sing but had too anyway. My accent becomes an incredibly thick cockney when i sing. Man i have never seen so many teenage girls look at me in disgust since i was in school.

  4. #4
    chicamahomico's Avatar
    chicamahomico is offline Respected Member
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    Prime you are a funny mofo.

    Congrtas on a job well done butterface. It's the funniest phenomenon........people all want to know the guy who everybody else wants to know (or already knows). I tell my classmates in college all the time that this kinda play is way more likely to get you promoted than being a slaveworking drone or being a supergenius with zero people skills and no coolfactor.

  5. #5
    Blown_SC is offline Retired Vet
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    I always thought it was chloroform?

  6. #6
    punk_bbuilder's Avatar
    punk_bbuilder is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blown_SC
    I always thought it was chloroform?


    NO NO NO....Roofies my friend.

  7. #7
    Blown_SC is offline Retired Vet
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    Quote Originally Posted by punk_bbuilder
    NO NO NO....Roofies my friend.
    What was I thinking!
    God bless roofies

  8. #8
    jbigdog69's Avatar
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    I would just bring Blown SC with me. All the babes would be sure to come to The Dog due to the physical and visual differences. lol

  9. #9
    Blown_SC is offline Retired Vet
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    Quote Originally Posted by jbigdog69
    I would just bring Blown SC with me. All the babes would be sure to come to The Dog due to the physical and visual differences. lol
    Yeah you're right...
    Maybe I'd be nice and pull my pants up and give you a chance with them too

  10. #10
    punk_bbuilder's Avatar
    punk_bbuilder is offline Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blown_SC
    What was I thinking!
    God bless roofies

    And if all the chicks are ugly..just take 5 yourself....Only problem is then you go to bed with Cinderella and wake up with Quazimodo

  11. #11
    FCECC2 is offline Anabolic Member
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    actually the best way is to dig a hole and but corn down it.

  12. #12
    spywizard's Avatar
    spywizard is offline AR-Elite Hall of Famer~
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    You know why guys start bands????????

    because girls love the boys in the band.......

    you are living proof........
    The answer to your every question

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    Don't Let the Police kick your ass

  13. #13
    abstrack's Avatar
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    thats cool, did you get laid by anyone of those hot chicks?
    abstrack@protonmail.com

  14. #14
    jbigdog69's Avatar
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    Ba ha ha ha ha!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Blown_SC
    Yeah you're right...
    Maybe I'd be nice and pull my pants up and give you a chance with them too
    The only reason you would pull your pants up is because all the girls would be laughing at ya...

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