Bump for four of the best websites EVER...

www.realultimatepower.net - ninjas are so totally awesome

www.maddox.xmission.com - read the 'you're not dave chapelle' article...priceless

www.blackpeopleloveus.com - special thanks to chris adams for bringing this to my attention. I don't believe there's been an update in almost a year, but it still KILLS me every time i see it.

www.tuckermax.com - he should by your hero by the time you're done reading his tales. If he's not, I question your religion, morals, sexuality and beliefs.

I will continue to bump these until I believe the members of AR have been sufficiently exposed to these gems. And yes, i'm fully aware that I've contributed NOTHING of substance to this board since my cycle ended. Sue me.

BUMP.....don't tempt me people

i just finished sushi pants and cant stop laughing
from tuckermax

great post!

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Originally Posted by DevilsDeity

i just finished sushi pants and cant stop laughing
from tuckermax

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Six of the eight are here. I lie to the hostesses, and they seat our incomplete party. Everyone is talking about my breathalyzer. I am the focus of adulation. I forgive everyone for sucking so bad. I think this night may go OK after all.

www.timecube.com

That Tucker dude just made me nearly piss in my pants from laughing. The sushi pants was funny but the hockey game was to die laughing at. Thanks bro, great post.

It has come to my attention that many standard website blockers prevent people from accessing 'realultimatepower.net' from work. Towards that end, I'm posting an excerpt from the website (which is about ninjas) so you can all see how truly revolutionary it is.

In the olden days, there was this sweet king that had mounds of gold and babes. These pirates decided to steal the mounds and surrounded the castle and everybody freaked, except the king who was like “Chill homies, I’ll handle this crap.”

The pirates stood outside the castle walls and were like “You think you are so cool, but guess what, you’re not. Good luck dying!” Then the king replied “Yeah right. How would you like to meet my best friends?”

Then out of nowhere there was a small sound of a guitar wailing really really hard behind the hills. The wailing started getting louder and louder and louder. Then out of nowhere there was this one sweet ass ninja standing on top of a huge hill. Everybody was like “Woooooooooooow!” He was wearing all black and he had this jet red guitar in his hands. Then smoke smoked over the hills like trains. But the smoke was ninjas. And the pirates saw about a billion ninjas with guitars standing on top this his huge hill. And they started to wail…

When the ninjas wailed on their guitars, the pirates started spraying diarrhea on each other and loved it. And when they wailed harder, the pirates sprayed harder. As the ninjas sauntered down the hill, the pirates’ chests and butts exploded. (They died from this.) Then the ninjas finally reached the boss pirate who was really huge. Out of nowhere the boss pirate pulled out this baby banjo and tried to fiddle with it like a little baby-baby. The ninjas were like “Yeah right.” and all the billions of ninjas surrounded the boss pirate. Half of the ninjas all combined to form the biggest guitar in the universe. The other half formed the second biggest boner in the universe. Then the huge guitar pointed right at the pirate, who was like “Holy CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!” Before the pirate could even do anything, the super boner slapped against the guitar making the hugest wail ever to happen anywhere ever. The pirate exploded so hard that every single one of his kids he would have had exploded and all of his grandparents exploded along with his neighbors and people who he merely said “hello” to.

Then there was this huge concert at the castle. All the babes in the castle morphed into this humongous female crotch. The huge boner and crotch porked softly, while slamming into the guitar and wailing. And guess what, the king sat on top of this huge pile of gold and babes and laughed his frigg’n ass off about how stupid the pirates were.

I love the graph on how 99% of the population isnt dave chapelle :lol:

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Originally Posted by BigGreen

www.maddox.xmission.com - read the 'you're not dave chapelle' article...priceless

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Originally Posted by Gilster

That Tucker dude just made me nearly piss in my pants from laughing. The sushi pants was funny but the hockey game was to die laughing at. Thanks bro, great post.

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I hear ya, that tucker max site is one of the few things that has literally caused me to laugh out loud while alone and by myself. It's pure genius.

this dude lives in my town lmfao

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Originally Posted by juicehoe

this dude lives in my town lmfao

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BRING HIM TO US

hahah black people love us

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Originally Posted by BigGreen

BRING HIM TO US

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I don't know if he'll be thrilled to have you stalking him and all Big Green. Admire his greatness from a distance and let it go at that.

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Originally Posted by Juggy'sTwat

I don't know if he'll be thrilled to have you stalking him and all Big Green. Admire his greatness from a distance and let it go at that.

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Don't toy with me old man....this is between me, juicehoe and the 18 feet of clothesline rope I have in the trunk of my car.

The hunt is on :dg:

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Originally Posted by BigGreen

Don't toy with me old man....this is between me, juicehoe and the 18 feet of clothesline rope I have in the trunk of my car.

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the tuckermax site is funny as ****.

to the top slizzuts

those are some random sites! :lol:

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Originally Posted by Prime

those are some random sites! :lol:

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Yes, if by 'random' you mean 'frighteningly awesome'.

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Originally Posted by BigGreen

Yes, if by 'random' you mean 'frighteningly awesome'.

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www.ihateclowns.com ;)

lol i hateclowns.com