My woman is driving me crazy!

**Jdawg50** · 09-24-2004, 04:11 PM

First of all I love her a lot!
But, she is killing me with the baby talk bros.
Many of you may know I got married about 4 months ago. And now all she talks about is babies. I have explained to her That I want to wait a little while (like a year) before we have another kid (She has a 8yr old from a previous marriage).
So today she goes on this rampage about how money is not important, but having children is. I said to her, What's wrong with planning things out and having the best of both worlds. I have a master's in Business, and I think about money a LOT! She just got a job after have supported her through college, and now she wants to have a kid and work part-time! We just got on the right financial track! Errrrr WTF???

You see she grew up with a single mom, and no money. I on the other hand grew up in an upper middle class family that had a decent amount of money. I just want to be sure I can do it finacially before we jump into it. I want to have kids, but not THIS SECOND. I just want to wait a while, so I know I can afford a kid. I bought a book the other day and it said the a kid costs you on average 15-20% of your income... THATS A LOT OF DAM MONEY!

So is it soooo wrong for me to want to wait a while before we start working on it? She's 30 yrs old, and I'm 30yrs old... Its not like were 35 or even 40... Any advise would be great
thanks

**Rod Farva** · 09-24-2004, 05:04 PM

She figures if she throws logic to the wind and just keeps wearing on you then after a while she can get what she wants. Rational thought and prior compromise agreements means nothing in this type of situation.

If you want to get her off of your back, give her a definitive answer as opposed to just "later". Tell her in 1 yr, 2 yrs,...

**decadbal** · 09-24-2004, 05:07 PM

dude u dont hav to have kids... shecan do something for you, or you can see how it will be for the rest of your life..

**Jdawg50** · 09-24-2004, 05:09 PM

SO 5 mins ago she says to me: " the reason I get so pissed is because I am questioning the same things">>> WOMEN ARE NUTS!

**Mart651** · 09-24-2004, 05:19 PM

Sounds like she rather be a stay at home mom. When women nest is for two reasons, they are getting old or they don't want to work. Not saying your wife is this way, it's just my experience in life.

**bigol'legs** · 09-24-2004, 05:29 PM

Heres what you do bro, tell her you've been lying this whole time and you got a vasactemy a LONG time ago..

**juicehoe** · 09-24-2004, 05:30 PM

Women dont use logic in an argument... didnt u know this

**Jdawg50** · 09-24-2004, 06:11 PM

I know guys I know, And she knows I havent gotten a vasectomy

**Pale Horse** · 09-24-2004, 06:48 PM

Did you know that women can calculate to the exact day when they will get pregnant? You are in the web, it's just a matter of time.

**metallicafan4u69** · 09-24-2004, 07:02 PM

Women do and say things for reasons. This could be a hidden message like spend more time with her or pay more attention to her because if she is looking for something to fill the void like a child you have to wonder. If she already has one from a previous then she knows what going thru that is going to be like again and I don't think she really wants that. It is hell. Come on guys, you know what I mean.

**palme** · 09-24-2004, 08:06 PM

Women are crazy bro. I think your doing the right thing building a solid fundation, just cause your married dosent mean you hafto start making babies, she should respect your opinion about waiting.

**symatech** · 09-25-2004, 09:34 AM

Originally Posted by palme

Women are crazy bro. I think your doing the right thing building a solid fundation, just cause your married dosent mean you hafto start making babies, she should respect your opinion about waiting.

i agree. babies should be a mutual thing. Just because somebody wants them straight away doesnt mean that you have to have them immdediately. Wait until your both ready. i like rod's advice, give her a definate (well more or less definatel) time frame, like a year or two. good luck bro

**TexasFitnessGirl** · 09-25-2004, 09:56 AM

Originally Posted by juicehoe

Women dont use logic in an argument... didnt u know this

HAHA!

I dont agree woman that want a baby just dont want to work or they are gettin gold. Many woman have a natural maternal instinct. It is the same things that drive your Moms to cook for you the minute you visit her or make her want to wash your laundry. It is possible that some of us like being pregnant, like having babies. I have to say though, starting a family is a very wonderful experience and if you are not ready then the experience will not be what it should. Talk to her honestly and tell her that you want nothing more than to have a baby with her, but you have just gotten married hence started your life and family with her, that you would like a little time to enjoy being with her first and when the times comes to have a baby you want it to be perfect because it will be the most wonderful experience of your lives. You have to appeal to the needy emotional side of a female to get your point across. To most woman, not having the right funds is a lame excuse...B4 everyone yells at me, it's not that I dont agree with you it is better to be financially stable, it's just that most woman do not rationalize that way.

**bluethunder** · 09-25-2004, 10:26 AM

She may be feeling she NEEDS to have a baby because time is short and for a woman her furtile yrs are getting shorter. I would take her out for a nice romantic dinner maybe see a good movie ,go dancing and communicating about life. Then tell her how & why you feel kids should be later that your own time together is important. She will probably realize she may be too anxious to have kids. And do not forget the rose & I love you and thank you...