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Thread: Relationship Drama
09-28-2004, 08:49 AM #1
OK, where to begin. I started seeing this girl about a week and a half ago. She is a nice girl (although she smokes and drinks a bit to much) and she has a good personality, we hit it off pretty good and we have spent alot of time together. Her vehicle is torn up at the moment so i have taken her to work and home a few times which is totally out of my way but i do not mind. I took her to see her uncle who is dying of cancer last Saturday, drove about an hour to take her there each way and spent my Saturday doing that. Obviously this is not a fling..i am wanting a relationship....
Well last night she calls me from an unknown number so i don't pick it up, i get a voicemail and it is her and she does'nt sound to happy. So i call the number back and it is her friends cell phone (some guy thats 36) and i talk to her, she seems a bit down. I tried to cheer her up but to no avail, se starts asking me in a round about way (can never put a perfect sentence together with a question) what i want. I told her that we are exclusive and that we should take it day by day and see what happens she then tells "Do you know how many times i have heard that" then literally she breaks down and cries and gives the phone to her friend...here i am laying in bed because i wanna get up early for cardio...
I talk to him and he tells me about one of her ex's that cut her with a knife and beat her up all the time etc...she finally comes back to the phone and i was trying to tell her that i am serious about her but we should take it day by day and see where this relationship takes us ( i usually go all out and let the chips fall where they may but those days are over so now i kind of see what happens and go from there, i'm not setting myself up like i have in the past)...she starts balling and hands the phone off again...i talk once more with her firend and he says hat she really likes me but won't talk bla bla bla...
I have known this chick for a week and a half and she is already crying and obviously has past issues haunting her which can only be normal seeing as how she was treated. What type of person would abuse someone and cut them up (has scars on her legs) etc...That is some sadistic ****.
My question is, what in the hell should i do..i am thinking about letting this one go..to much drama to soon for me personally.
Anyone else ever have something like this happen so soon?
Needless to say...i did'nt make it up for cardio god****it!
Last edited by Panzerfaust; 09-28-2004 at 08:52 AM.
09-28-2004, 08:59 AM #2
sounds like she has alot of emotional baggage, and im my book i stay the hell away from chicks like that. been in those relationships in the past with girls who had bad **** done to them by their ex's and then they always expect u to do the same. never getting the benefit of the doubt ya know?
i would run like a mofo from this chick, from what u have said, save yourself the trouble and problems down the road by letting it get any further involved.
09-28-2004, 09:05 AM #3Originally Posted by w_rballs
i agree with the cow on this one, i know that you want to be soft hearted and all but in the long run you are the one that will pay that price..so imo just keep it as friends or not even that..if you have to say something about the way she acts and that it freaks you out or just stay the hell away from her... obviously she has issues, that could be a good reason why she drinks a lot.. well i cant say that i used to drink alot, but that was because i like it. good luck bro
09-28-2004, 09:11 AM #4
I agree. Chances are, you could evetually help her to "heal her wounds", but unless you are looking for a long term charity case, I would cut ties
09-28-2004, 09:31 AM #5
I can see what would most likely happen, she would **** on me because i refuse to treat her like dirt. I have seen it before, the more you treat them like ****, the more they love you.
09-28-2004, 09:34 AM #6Originally Posted by muriloninja
09-28-2004, 09:36 AM #7Originally Posted by muriloninja
why is that?? i know guys arent like that unless she has some bomb ass puss.. i cant deal with **** like that at all!! i would give someone the boot if they treated me like ****.
09-28-2004, 09:38 AM #8
that whole thing is just scary...my instinct would be to jet, you'll never unpack all that baggage
09-28-2004, 09:38 AM #9
I have seen it, i would like to help her in anyway but i need to take care of myselkf and in no way need to be dragged into a life of drama right now. I have school and i work full time (at work now) and then i have my gym time.
The good thing about this one though is the fact that she does not have any children which is very hard to find.
09-28-2004, 10:25 AM #10
Any more input form the ladies of AR?
09-28-2004, 10:36 AM #11
RUN!!!!!!!! Seriously she needs some counseling. Encourage her to get it to deal with that baggage. Tell her after she gets some help maybe you can try again. Offer to be her friend and be there to talk while she sorts through things...but you are not a shrink and you can't fix those problems.
09-28-2004, 10:37 AM #12Originally Posted by muriloninja
09-28-2004, 11:28 AM #13Originally Posted by Commando_Barbi
Sounds like the way i will go with this, i went to lunch and had a voicemail from her friend stating how he did'nt hang up on me last night (she never came back to the phone and i told him i had to go) and he would talk to me later.
This **** is freaky....i'm outta there......
09-28-2004, 11:29 AM #14
Yea I got a girl I dont like.. and I am sooo rude to her.. but the rudder I am and the more I ignore her she loves it cuz shes never been treated anything but crap from other guys
09-28-2004, 11:29 AM #15
09-28-2004, 11:39 AM #16
Unfortunately I have to agree with everybody here. Run like hell!! (does that count as cardio??) I have been in a couple of relationships with girls that were messed up like that and you'll NEVER be able to help them ll the way. Like Barbi said...encourage her to go for counseling and once she has unpacked that baggage THEN you guys can give it a try. I would still try to stay friends with her and help her in any way possible....but that would be as far as I would take it!! Good luck bro!
09-28-2004, 11:42 AM #17Originally Posted by needmorestrength
So you are basically implying that you are a ****ing scumbag huh?
Does it make you feel proud to treat her like crap?
Its not supposed to be a good thing.
09-28-2004, 11:48 AM #18Originally Posted by muriloninja
09-28-2004, 11:50 AM #19Associate Member
Originally Posted by hung-solo
- Join Date
- Aug 2003
- Aukland, NZ
I would agree also. Unless YOU have become really attached. If you are at a point where you can walk, I would walk. It just sounds like SHE is not ready for a relationship right now.
I have been through this myself. I tend to treat my women like gold when I am seeing them. It's just the way I am. I am no carpet for them to walk over, but I am nice. Some women cannot handle that. they are used to, and subsequently only date men that treat them like garbage. When they get a nice guy, they do not know how to act.
09-28-2004, 12:43 PM #20Originally Posted by TexasFitnessGirl
I think i will most likely walk away from this one.....by the way TFG, please put your old avatar back up so i can see more...the new one is great and all but i liked staring at your old one.
09-28-2004, 12:49 PM #21
Do you need even need to ask this question?......you've only known her for a week and a half!!!............she obvsiuely has some serious issues if she is still talking to someone who "cuts her with a knife"......if you stay, your only bringing more drama on yourself..........run away and dont look back
09-28-2004, 12:52 PM #22Originally Posted by Danielle
No, she is not talking to any ex's. Its just the fact of what they did to her and how they treated her. Very sad actually.
09-28-2004, 12:55 PM #23Originally Posted by muriloninja
09-28-2004, 01:00 PM #24
it is sad, and your final decision is all up to you, but if this is how it started in 1.5 weeks, then imagine what other baggage she has got waiting for that unsuspecting sole who incurs her wrath. I'd be out before you in too deep. JMO.
09-28-2004, 01:00 PM #25Originally Posted by needmorestrength
09-28-2004, 01:05 PM #26Originally Posted by needmorestrength
Tell her you've come out of the closet and a relationship with a female is simply not an option
09-28-2004, 01:09 PM #27Originally Posted by muriloninja
09-28-2004, 01:10 PM #28Originally Posted by co2boi
09-28-2004, 06:57 PM #29Originally Posted by muriloninja
09-28-2004, 07:00 PM #30Banned
Originally Posted by Danielle
- Join Date
- Aug 2004
09-28-2004, 07:09 PM #31ttuPrincess Guest
RUN!!!! as fast as you can... a girl like that wont change let the head case find some poor brainless idiot to deal with her
and acting like that after a week???? WTF!!!
09-28-2004, 08:25 PM #32Originally Posted by TexasFitnessGirl
09-28-2004, 10:01 PM #33
Okay PUMP IT or DUMP IT....Definitely DUMP IT....My ex of 3 years was like that....too much emotional baggage and the nice guy gets fvcked up the arse........If I were you bro.....I'd just totally cut her off because if u'r worried about your cardio that u missed.....just put it this way...if u deal with this broad there will be a point where u'll be putting her on a fvcking pedestal and in the process u'll end up losing your confidence and guess what in this whole ordeal u'll probably won't even feel like training or eating healthy, your school and work will get affected....you know wat will happen......She will put a bad Aura on you meaning that u will be making her feel good and in return you'll get charged up with her negative energy......just like catching a bad STD (god forbid)...so yeah DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!
09-28-2004, 10:40 PM #34
If your the kind of guy like most people are on this board ( not meaning that in a bad way, but honestly, most people here are only intrested in humpin) then run, if your into serious ralationships then i would at least stay to see what could happen. My wife of 3 years had some serious issues in her past, and in the first week she told me about her depression, cutting, past ralationship problems ext.... and it took a while for her to start really trusting me, but she has been the best thing that has hapend to me. Im VERY happy with our marrage, and she is defenatly doesnt act like she used to.
09-28-2004, 10:53 PM #35
Dude if its a week and there is already that much drama... thats not a good sign. She def has some past issues and thats not a bad thing unless she cant get pass them. Id say hit the road because if u dont... shes a flight risk... she'll get freaked out and leave u, but if you really like her then maybe you should give her a chance if you willing to put up with some more drama
09-29-2004, 08:22 AM #36
I have not heard from her as of yet, i am waiting for her to call me as i feel it is she that has some serious explaining to do (why did she freak out bla bla bla). If she does not contact me today, she is history plain and simple........
09-29-2004, 08:55 AM #37
She should be history regardless. You are asking for a long hard road if you stick with that luv
Either way......Good Luck.
09-29-2004, 09:00 AM #38Originally Posted by Commando_Barbi
There is no "Love" to it. I just think she has been through some horrible stuff and would like her to explain herself (why is it that she freaked out on me etc...).
09-29-2004, 09:02 AM #39Originally Posted by muriloninja
09-29-2004, 09:10 AM #40
I will for sure...i am just as interested to learn as you are. I am in no way attached to this girl, she is nice and i was serious about her as far as us being exclusive but she could'nt have timed this **** more perfect because i can cut and run and i have lost nothing.
Might wanna thank her for that is she does call.
Last edited by Panzerfaust; 09-29-2004 at 09:14 AM.
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