The Official "Marry BigGreen" Thread
I am now accepting applications for the position of 'wife', as I've decided it would be kinda sweet to have one. Applications will be accepted on a rolling basis until October 15th, 2004. At that point, qualified candidates will be invited to interview for the position. Please note, this posting is not limited to AR, however.
My accomplishments, and thus desirability, speak for themselves. Here on this board, I have:
1. Authored several of the FAQ 'posts', including this gem on ordering through the mail that several newbies have no doubt found INVALUABLE. http://67.18.108.244//faq.php?faq=ob...roids#faq_mail
2. To the delight of thousands (i estimate) I spent an entire weekend posting entirely in old english (or, "olde englifh" if you prefer). I did not confine this tomfoolery merely to the lounge, and ventured into several of the main forums with my act.
3. Began ARs coolest thread "10 Random Things About You" (http://67.18.108.244//showthread.php?t=41652)
4. Introduced an initiative to parody threads in the lounge which is still in its infancy.
5. Founded the original AR fantasy football league
Off the board, my accomplishments are not nearly as impressive, but still existent, as I have:
*gone to some schools
*won some junk
*never worked a real job ever (this is an awesome accomplishment)
*secured myself a pet rat
I expect to receive several applications for this position. Though BigGreen is an equal opportunity employer, I regret that this position is open only to AR's female members and/or moderators regardless of sex. That being said, I can not in good conscience marry someone old enough and of the same necessary sex to be my father - so I'm sure i will be hit with a discrimination lawsuit from Cycleon.
Also, be aware that a portion of this procedure may involved writing a "why me" essay which will be publicly posted in this thread. That is all.
