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11-20-2004, 08:06 PM #1Associate Member
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- Jun 2004
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- 171
Indecent exposure in my own house!! WTF??!!
What was supposed to be a kick-off to a great day yesterday started out a nightmare. A very hot booty call was coming by my place at around noon on her lunch break. Anyways, I did the sh*t, shower, and shave routine. Then I dried up and I started to browse at some porn on the net to get worked up(not that I really had to, but hey porn is a healthy thing). The doorbell rang and it was about 10 before noon, I was suprised it was this early, but hey she must have been anxious for a good hard romping.
So instead of throwing on clothes before I answered the door, I figured might as well cut to the chase and answer the door naked with erect penis in tow.
So I answer the door and it was not her!!! It was some fat old lady standing there with religious material in her hand and she looked at me like I was some sort of Alien! There I was standing naked with erect penis and all I could muster was a "uhh.. hi". My penis soon grew limp.
She started glaring at me and said she was going to call the police for indecent exposure. WTF??!! I'm still standing there naked and told her hey you came to MY house woman. So she starts yelling all this crappy stuff how I should be locked up and then how I'm a sinner blah blah blahhh..
I started to get really pissed at this solicitor, but then realize I'm standing there naked and laughed to myself. So in light of the situation, I just grabbed my pecker, pointed it toward her and asked if she wanted to touch it. Maybe I was outa pocket right there, but hey it wasnt like I went to her house.
Anyways, do I have anything to worry about? I'm concerned that she went to the cops. I don't want to get into any legal trouble, especially something this embarrassing. Should I call a lawyer?
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11-20-2004, 08:10 PM #2
Does she have any proof that you were standing there naked ?
Did anyone else see you there ?
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11-20-2004, 08:37 PM #3AR Hall of Fame
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- Dec 2002
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- 25,737
Dude it's your house!!!!
I'd have pissed on her and told here to get the f*ck off my property with her SOLICITING
SH*T.
You have nada to worry about!!
I personally love how you grabbed it and asked her if she wanted to touch it!
~SC~
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11-20-2004, 08:43 PM #4
wow thats quite a story. i would just deny everything if something comes up. say you were in your boxers or something. next time use the peep hole
~HOP
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11-20-2004, 09:11 PM #5
I recall watching RealTV or something like that - this woman had caught her neighbor on film standing naked in his window - she used this as evidence to put him behide bars , she claimed that he kept exposing himself to her on a repeated basis , police couldn't do anything with her claims because it was her word over his until she caught him on cam... but I doubt this old woman had a camera and I doubt ( atleast I hope not ) you've flashed other people repeatedly in such a manner .
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11-20-2004, 09:39 PM #6
Thats a great story....lol
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11-20-2004, 10:37 PM #7
Thats great, you asked her to touch it! No your fine unless its on film or something
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11-20-2004, 10:42 PM #8
I guess she just knocked on the wrong door....lmao
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11-20-2004, 10:53 PM #9
At least she did'nt laugh at ya!!! LOL Tell anyone who calls or comes by that you were in a 3 piece suite and that granny has a vivid imagination!!!
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11-21-2004, 10:42 AM #10
not to get u worried bro, but u can get in trouble. something like this just happened in my city. a dude answered the door in just a t-shirt and his dick was exposed to the pizza lady. she called the cops, in the end he was charge with lewd behavior and indecent exposure i beleive. he spent a couple days in jail.
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11-21-2004, 10:45 AM #11
LMAO that was pretty funny.
Do you have a peep hole in your door????? I'd suggest installing one if not. Will save you some grief. Thank god it wasn't a girl scout or something!!!1. Once a cheat always a cheat!
2. YES, SHE can get pregnant the first time!
3. NO, PULLING out IS NOT a RELIABLE method of Birth Control. DAMMMMIT..... Wrap that shyte UP!!
Women over 30 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the opera or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won't hesitate to shoot you, if they think they can get away with it.
For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free". Here's an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire Pig, just to get a little sausage.
What the mind can conceive....the body will achieve!
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11-21-2004, 10:47 AM #12
sounds kinda like bs but funny as hell. how could you just stand there and have a conversation?
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11-21-2004, 11:16 AM #13
LMAO!!! These 3 lines should be all time AR classics...
Originally Posted by Tony Soprano
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11-21-2004, 12:01 PM #14Associate Member
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- Jun 2004
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so far so good, no calls from any cops yet, knock on wood.. I have a clean record and intend for it to stay that way!
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11-21-2004, 12:52 PM #15Originally Posted by Tony Soprano
no pun intended!! hahahah
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11-21-2004, 01:08 PM #16Member
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- Dec 2003
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- 492
Was it one of those dam Jehovah Wittnesses, They must be the most miserable basterds ever. But like they said it's her word against your's and their's nothing to worry about.
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11-21-2004, 01:52 PM #17Originally Posted by kloter1
Sound like something i'd do...I mean, dang you've been already spotted nude..why run cover up?
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11-21-2004, 02:13 PM #18
Hope she didn't spoil your booty call for ya.
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11-21-2004, 02:21 PM #19
SO the big question is did you ever end up getting ass that day because if you did thats all that matters right just tell the cops hey at least i got some
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11-21-2004, 02:25 PM #20
Hey no kidding did you get to hit it or not????
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11-21-2004, 02:31 PM #21
**** man your lucky thats who was at the door. Do you not look through the eye hole or at least ask who it is before opening the door, especially naked...lucky it wasn't your grandma or your gay neighbor
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