Would you let you wife/husband die?

**D-END** · 03-19-2005, 03:52 PM

I was watching the this whole Terry Schiavo thing on the news today. And I don't know what I would do if my wife was on a feeding tube for 15 years and their was no hope for her having a life outside of a hospital bed.

Part of me wouldn't want to want her suffer, but the other part of me thinks who am I to decide if my wife lives or dies.

Who you guys remove your wife's/husband's feeding tube and let her starve to death?

For those of you who don't know terry schiavo is a woman with brain damage that was caused by a stroke and for the last 15 years she has been eating through a feeding tube, the tube was removed yesterday by her husband and hospice doctors. It will take her anywhere from 7-21 days to starve to death.

**BUBBA74** · 03-19-2005, 03:57 PM

Like I said in another thread. I hope they can keep her feeding tube in but if not they need to find a better way to end her life. Starving her to death isnt the way to go.

**J-Dogg** · 03-19-2005, 03:58 PM

wtf, kill her don't let her starve.

She probably can't feel any of it or anything.

I don't think I would be able to remove the tube, I'd hold out for hope of a new procedure (STEM CELL RESEARCH!) to be able to cure them.

In 10 years, think back to what we can do with the body today. You'll laugh and think it's pathetice. Their is so much to learn (DNA/RNA/Stemcells) and we are learning fast. Discovering how to map human DNA and to manipulate stem cells is by far the biggest achivement humans have made.

**Lozgod** · 03-19-2005, 03:58 PM

I posted about this in the political forum. No way would I let her die.

**The Massacre** · 03-19-2005, 03:58 PM

Tough decision. I think she would suffer more if she were to starve to death. Remember...She's been fed by a tube for 15 years. She hasn't been dead for 15 years. I don't think its right. Thats JMO

**D-END** · 03-19-2005, 04:03 PM

Originally Posted by Lozgod

I posted about this in the political forum. No way would I let her die.

so you would keep feeding her until she died from natural causes?

**The Massacre** · 03-19-2005, 04:04 PM

Thats the approach I would take.

**Lozgod** · 03-19-2005, 04:04 PM

Originally Posted by D-END

so you would keep feeding her until she died from natural causes?

yup. You never know what tomorrow's medicine brings.

**D-END** · 03-19-2005, 04:07 PM

Originally Posted by Lozgod

yup. You never know what tomorrow's medicine brings.

yeah I agree there.....but what if she asked you to either kill her or let her die (before she was is that state), would you?

**Lozgod** · 03-19-2005, 04:10 PM

Originally Posted by D-END

yeah I agree there.....but what if she asked you to either kill her or let her die (before she was is that state), would you?

I couldn't do it. Everyone talks like that until they are faced with death. Then they don't want to die. I had a friend that jumped off the Delaware Memorial Bridge and lived. He was one of only 3 people that had lived out of 100's that jumped. He said the first thought in his head once his feet left the bridge was he didn't want to die.

**The Massacre** · 03-19-2005, 04:11 PM

Originally Posted by Lozgod

I couldn't do it. Everyone talks like that until they are faced with death. Then they don't want to die. I had a friend that jumped off the Delaware Memorial Bridge and lived. He was one of only 3 people that had lived out of 100's that jumped. He said the first thought in his head once his feet left the bridge was he didn't want to die.

Why would he even do that? Thats nuts.

**D-END** · 03-19-2005, 04:11 PM

what if she left it in her living will?

**Lozgod** · 03-19-2005, 04:13 PM

Originally Posted by The Massacre

Why would he even do that? Thats nuts.

He was depressed about something. I don't remember. His girlfriend killed herself when he cheated on her I think.

**Lozgod** · 03-19-2005, 04:13 PM

Originally Posted by D-END

what if she left it in her living will?

I would want to out of respect, but not a death by dehydration.

**J-Dogg** · 03-19-2005, 04:14 PM

I would not be able to do it for my own selfish reasons, I don't care what they said or left in their will.

I would assume though that if they left that in their will, they said it only because they did not want to cause a burden upon anyone. I'd gladly take the burden as long as she was a loving wife and did not **** my brother

**D-END** · 03-19-2005, 04:23 PM

Originally Posted by J-Dogg

I would not be able to do it for my own selfish reasons, I don't care what they said or left in their will.

I would assume though that if they left that in their will, they said it only because they did not want to cause a burden upon anyone. I'd gladly take the burden as long as she was a loving wife and did not **** my brother

I disagree, I will have my living will completed in a few days. I have stated that anytime past 90 days on life suppport (breathing machine, feeding tube ect). I want everything to be removed and want to expire naturally. I wouldn't want to "live" like that. I don't want my family or wife to have to watch (which could be over what could be years) me slowly waste away into nothing. I would want them to remember me as a great athlete, strong and vibrant, not some withered shell of what I use to be.

**Lozgod** · 03-19-2005, 04:26 PM

I don't have a living will but when I make one it is going to say you better keep me alive as long as possible. I am not a religous man. I believe when I die exostance is over, I want to exist as long as possible.

Originally Posted by D-END

I disagree, I will have my living will completed in a few days. I have stated that anytime past 90 days on life suppport (breathing machine, feeding tube ect). I want everything to be removed and want to expire naturally. I wouldn't want to "live" like that. I don't want my family or wife to have to watch (which could be over what could be years) me slowly waste away into nothing. I would want them to remember me as a great athlete, strong and vibrant, not some withered shell of what I use to be.

**J-Dogg** · 03-19-2005, 04:26 PM

Originally Posted by D-END

I disagree, I will have my living will completed in a few days. I have stated that anytime past 90 days on life suppport (breathing machine, feeding tube ect). I want everything to be removed and want to expire naturally. I wouldn't want to "live" like that. I don't want my family or wife to have to watch (which could be over what could be years) me slowly waste away into nothing. I would want them to remember me as a great athlete, strong and vibrant, not some withered shell of what I use to be.

I can respect that, wanting to go out with honor some what. We'll all have different views, death is just a hell of a thing to deal with, but one thing for sure is we will have to deal with it in this life time.

**D-END** · 03-19-2005, 04:29 PM

Originally Posted by Lozgod

I don't have a living will but when I make one it is going to say you better keep me alive as long as possible. I am not a religous man. I believe when I die exostance is over, I want to exist as long as possible.

yeah i don't think that their is anything else after this life sometimes......but someone please kill me if I'm a veg.

**Lozgod** · 03-19-2005, 04:30 PM

Originally Posted by D-END

but someone please kill me if I'm a veg.

I will come to Chicago and do it. I got your back bro.

**D-END** · 03-19-2005, 04:31 PM

Originally Posted by Lozgod

I will come to Chicago and do it. I got your back bro.

seriously?

you sick fvck..j/k

**AVAGO** · 03-19-2005, 04:42 PM

If it were me id want to die defo....

**SwoleCat** · 03-19-2005, 05:47 PM

My wife and I have talked about this, and if we are ever in "vegetable" status, where the docs say the person is basically never going to wake up, then pull the plug!

I told her to pull it on me, let me rest in peace, begin your healing process and it'll be over quicker and it's better for both parties. Dragging it on over years and years may feel like there is hope, but it only serves to consume you negatively for years on end.

Again, this is only what her and I have decided for us, not what I am saying is "right".

~SC~

**PaRiS2005** · 03-19-2005, 08:07 PM

I honestly don't know what I'd do in a sitution like that. Thats a difficult place to be in.

**tycin** · 03-19-2005, 08:19 PM

if i were in that state then i would definatly want the plug pulled, but its different if its ur wife! i dont think i could do it, like loz said u dont know wut the future has to bring medical wise, wut if they could reverse it eventually. its too hard to say wut u would until ur in the situation, i dunno wut i would do if i lost my girl.

i'm not afraid of dying myself, i'm afraid wut it would do to my girl and i'm afriad wut it would do to me if i lost her.

**yikes!!** · 03-19-2005, 08:20 PM

man, I just want to be kept alive for a maximum of 2 years.....after that they can pull the plug....I don't see how anybody would want to live that long by artificial means

**AVAGO** · 03-19-2005, 08:25 PM

Originally Posted by yikes!!

man, I just want to be kept alive for a maximum of 2 years.....after that they can pull the plug....I don't see how anybody would want to live that long by artificial means

Aight in that kind of situation you arnt really liveing just being kept alive by technology IMO that is wrong. We would all have our loved ones kept alive in the hope of new technology.

**TheMudMan** · 03-19-2005, 10:48 PM

I wouldn't want to be in the condition that woman is in. Also, she told her husband before this even happened that she would not want to be hooked up to any type of life support. So I hope she gets her wish and rest in peace because her and the husband derserve it. Why would anyone be so selfish and let another human have to live thier life that way when it wasn't what they wanted in the first place?

***Mr. Sparkle*** · 03-19-2005, 10:53 PM

The questions that keeps running in my mind is, is she truely living?

**XxElitexX** · 03-19-2005, 10:59 PM

very tough decision...i like what SC said about this

**TheMudMan** · 03-19-2005, 11:08 PM

Originally Posted by Mr. Sparkle

The questions that keeps running in my mind is, is she truely living?

That's a very good question and you know that she isn't............ It's a shame and I'm happy that I don't know how hard it would be to decide if a person was going to live or die. But a good part of this woman's life has been in a hospital and she most likely doesn't even know she's there.

**tycin** · 03-19-2005, 11:13 PM

Originally Posted by TheMudMan

That's a very good question and you know that she isn't............ It's a shame and I'm happy that I don't know how hard it would be to decide if a person was going to live or die. But a good part of this woman's life has been in a hospital and she most likely doesn't even know she's there.

true.... but it would b very hard to actually pull the plug on ur wife. i know it might b the better choice but it would still b extremly hard to do. in a way u would b putting her in peace which is good but then on the other hand i would always b thinkin wut if somehow,sometime they can reverse that and get her to live normally again.

**1819** · 03-19-2005, 11:16 PM

dont think i'd know until put in that position. l myself have a living will that is pretty extensive. i hope to convey my wishes, very clearly, to my loved ones so that the decision does'nt fall on their shoulders. lets hope none of us ever have to go through it. god bless her.

***Mr. Sparkle*** · 03-19-2005, 11:16 PM

Originally Posted by TheMudMan

That's a very good question and you know that she isn't............ It's a shame and I'm happy that I don't know how hard it would be to decide if a person was going to live or die. But a good part of this woman's life has been in a hospital and she most likely doesn't even know she's there.

yeah and that sucks, Im sure it would not be easy to let her go. But if I were in her place, Id like to think I would want to go... I have a strong faith, so death doesnt scare me...

Now if it were up to me to pull the plug on my wife... wouldnt be easy, but I think I would. I mean sitting there in an almost veg state is not really living IMO.

**Rob** · 03-19-2005, 11:20 PM

well..from experience with a friend..i can tell you to NOT PULL THE PLUG

I had a friend who Overdosed on cocaine and speed all at once last summer...she was found the next morning, completely blue but not dead.

Anyways, she was in a comma for 2 months, the doctors told her parents she WOULD be a vegetable for life if she should ever wake up. There was no brain activity or anything, she was on life supports.

Her parents didnt pull the plug, even after the doctors diagnosed her as brain dead, miraculesly(sp), one day, there was some brain activity. Well, she eventually woke up form the comma.

She didnt remember anything, her parents, her friends etc. It was as if she was born again, no intelligence or anything whatsoever.

After months of rehabilitation, shes managed to lead a semi normal life. Started walking, socializing etc.

To this day, she isnt fully recovered, she still needs a walker, she has trouble writing and cant read but she is living proof that miracles can happen.

**Timetraviler** · 03-19-2005, 11:21 PM

Originally Posted by D-END

I was watching the this whole Terry Schiavo thing on the news today. And I don't know what I would do if my wife was on a feeding tube for 15 years and their was no hope for her having a life outside of a hospital bed.

Part of me wouldn't want to want her suffer, but the other part of me thinks who am I to decide if my wife lives or dies.

Who you guys remove your wife's/husband's feeding tube and let her starve to death?

For those of you who don't know terry schiavo is a woman with brain damage that was caused by a stroke and for the last 15 years she has been eating through a feeding tube, the tube was removed yesterday by her husband and hospice doctors. It will take her anywhere from 7-21 days to starve to death.

My wife and I said longago that we would not want to live like that SO I WOULD PULL THE PLUG and let my best friend fialy REST in PC

**TheMudMan** · 03-19-2005, 11:21 PM

Originally Posted by tycin

true.... but it would b very hard to actually pull the plug on ur wife. i know it might b the better choice but it would still b extremly hard to do. in a way u would b putting her in peace which is good but then on the other hand i would always b thinkin wut if somehow,sometime they can reverse that and get her to live normally again.

I see your point but what if that time never comes.............. it is hard and I'm so happy I never was in that position and I hope to God I never will be. But this is why it's important to have a living will made up so that it's in a legal document what you want done in a situation like this.

**TheMudMan** · 03-19-2005, 11:22 PM

Originally Posted by Mr. Sparkle

yeah and that sucks, Im sure it would not be easy to let her go. But if I were in her place, Id like to think I would want to go... I have a strong faith, so death doesnt scare me...

Now if it were up to me to pull the plug on my wife... wouldnt be easy, but I think I would. I mean sitting there in an almost veg state is not really living IMO.

Yep, it's very sad indeed and not just for her but the whole family.

**tycin** · 03-19-2005, 11:33 PM

Originally Posted by TheMudMan

I see your point but what if that time never comes.............. it is hard and I'm so happy I never was in that position and I hope to God I never will be. But this is why it's important to have a living will made up so that it's in a legal document what you want done in a situation like this.

i know but the thought that they might b able to fix it would always b in the back of head until i died. i'm just happy that i've never been in the situation as well and never am put in that situation, losing a loved one is the worst feeling in the world! (especially your wife)

**MrMondodondo** · 03-20-2005, 12:47 AM

You will all probably be at a point where that decision has to be made. At 40 years old with 3 kids a Will/Trust is a must. It was a hard decision for me and the wife as well. We decided to take no "extreme measures" to save the life. If a vegatative state persists for (i forget the time) then all measures keeping the body alive are to cease. Never did think about this scenario tho. So , we are changing our position in the next draft of our wills so that we do not get starved to death as we both feel that it is cruel and unusual. So needless to say you just never know. We both do not want our family put through years of pain and misery for nothing either.

Mondo