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Thread: problem...

  1. #1
    liltae86's Avatar
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    problem...

    I've been going out with this guy for about 9 months and I decided not to see him again on Jan. but he kept emailing and calling me everyday (yes, from Jan to April) He waited for me near my house for a few days and just now I got an email and he said he is still waiting for me to come back to him. what should I do? The reason I don't want to see him anymore is because he asked me to marry him but I don't want to.

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    Blown_SC is offline Retired Vet
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    Are you positive you're over him? If so:

    Invite him over for a cup of coffee, sit him down, and explain to him your feelings.......... exactly how you feel. Tell him that there is NO chance of you reconsidering your decision, and take it from there...

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blown_SC
    Are you positive you're over him? If so:

    Invite him over for a cup of coffee, sit him down, and explain to him your feelings.......... exactly how you feel. Tell him that there is NO chance of you reconsidering your decision, and take it from there...
    I already did that but it didn't work.

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    Blown_SC is offline Retired Vet
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    Quote Originally Posted by liltae86
    I already did that but it didn't work.
    Then it's time to do something else.....

    Have you any friends in common, who could help you persuade him to move on?

  5. #5
    busster is offline Associate Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by liltae86
    I've been going out with this guy for about 9 months and I decided not to see him again on Jan. but he kept emailing and calling me everyday (yes, from Jan to April) He waited for me near my house for a few days and just now I got an email and he said he is still waiting for me to come back to him. what should I do? The reason I don't want to see him anymore is because he asked me to marry him but I don't want to.

    waiting near your house ??? can you say restraining order ??

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    Honestly, if YOU are over HIM and he still loves you, you have to just shut him out of your life completly, do not return his emails or his phone calls, do not even talk to him on the phone, dont try to be nice because that only leads him on to believe something that isnt true. This sounds a bit insensitive, ya, but thats what has to be done for him to actually get over YOU, if you keep talking to him he'll think that it's ok to call you on a regular basis, only hurting him more. Now, if you still have feelings for him thats a whole different story, but dont just hang around cuz you think something MIGHT work or settle for anything less than your worth.

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    Does he have a job? That is how many men in asia are. I lived in Sri Lanka for awhile and observed that most men dont really do anything except try to "whoo" girls to them even if that means waiting for them at their house or work. If you want to finish it tell him to leave you alone and quit talking to him, don't answer his calls ignore him when he waits for you and so on. He will eventually get over you.

  8. #8
    liltae86's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by notus
    Does he have a job? That is how many men in asia are. I lived in Sri Lanka for awhile and observed that most men dont really do anything except try to "whoo" girls to them even if that means waiting for them at their house or work. If you want to finish it tell him to leave you alone and quit talking to him, don't answer his calls ignore him when he waits for you and so on. He will eventually get over you.
    he's south african and he works 12hours a day. I think he's a very nice guy but I don't want to marry him. So it's impossible to be friends?

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    Quote Originally Posted by liltae86
    he's south african and he works 12hours a day. I think he's a very nice guy but I don't want to marry him. So it's impossible to be friends?
    YES. Coming from a guy who was once in this situation (I never showed up to the girls house uninvited though, lol) I can say that being friends does not work. He'll always think of you as more than a friend.

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    liltae86's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blown_SC
    Then it's time to do something else.....

    Have you any friends in common, who could help you persuade him to move on?
    I think he doesn't want me to have any friends. He doesn't want me to see any male. the funny thing is when I was talking to his friend one time he said "you guys should get together because you guys are having so much fun talking" and his friend was like "sure I'd like to" lol...

  11. #11
    Blown_SC is offline Retired Vet
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    Quote Originally Posted by liltae86
    I think he doesn't want me to have any friends. He doesn't want me to see any male. the funny thing is when I was talking to his friend one time he said "you guys should get together because you guys are having so much fun talking" and his friend was like "sure I'd like to" lol...
    You have 2 options:

    a) Remove him from the situation.
    b) Remove yourself from the situation.

    Get some help if need be, and work on a)...

  12. #12
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    wow you must have been doing something right for him to keep harassing you. all jokes aside though i would tell him to leave you alone before you take some serious actions on him.

  13. #13
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    just looked at your profile and your only 18??? Tell your parents there is a guy stalking you

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