Anabolics
Search More Than 6,000,000 Posts
Results 1 to 3 of 3
  1. #1
    63190's Avatar
    63190 is offline Anabolic Member
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    El Paso, Texas
    Posts
    2,263

    Things that Hallmark cards never say

    THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS
    DON'T SAY

    //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

    My tire was thumping.

    I thought it was flat

    When I looked at the tire...

    I noticed your cat.

    Sorry!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~

    Heard your wife left you,

    How upset you must be.

    But don't fret about it...

    She moved in with me.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

    Looking back over the years

    that we've been together,

    I can' t help but wonder...

    "What the hell was I thinking?"

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

    Congratulations on your wedding day!

    Too bad no one likes your husband.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

    How could two people as beautiful as you

    Have such an ugly baby?

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

    I've always wanted to have

    someone to hold,

    someone to love.

    After having met you.

    I've changed my mind.

    -------------------------------------- ---------------------------



    I Must admit, you brought Religion into my life.

    I never believed in Hell until I met you.

    //////////////////////////////////////////////////////

    As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...

    That you're not here to ruin it for me.

    ################################################## ##

    Congratulations on your promotion.

    Before you go...

    Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

    You'll probably need it again.


    ************************************************** ********************



    Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

    (Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~

    Happy birthday! You look great for your age.

    Almost Lifelike!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

    When we were together,

    you always said you'd die for me.

    Now that we've broken up,

    I think it's time you kept your promise.

    ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////



    We have been friends for a very long time.

    Let's say we stop?

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++

    I'm so miserable without you

    It's almost like you're here.

    ================================================== ===

    Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.

    Did you ever find out who the father was?

    %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

    Your friends and I wanted to do

    Something special for your birthday.

    So we're having you put to sleep.

    )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))



    So your daughter's a hooker,

    And it spoiled your day.

    Look at the bright side,

    It's really good pay.

  2. #2
    IronFreakX's Avatar
    IronFreakX is offline Banned
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Location
    U.S.A.
    Posts
    8,803
    dunno y people get mad when some1 is being honest

  3. #3
    Slick Arrado is offline Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    840
    Funny.



Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •