Mistaken Identity

A guy is in line at the supermarket when he notices that a rather hot blonde behind him has just raised her hand and smiled hello to him. He is rather
taken aback that such a looker would be waving to him, and although familiar he can't place where he might know her from, so he says
"Sorry, do you know me?"
She replies "I may be mistaken, but I thought you might be the father of one of my children."
His mind shoots back to the one and only time he has been unfaithful.
"Holy crap," he says, "are you that stripper from my bachelor party that I screwed on the pool table in front of all my friends while your girlfriend
whipped me with some wet celery and stuck a cucumber up my rear?"

"No," she replies, "I'm your son's English Teacher...."

this has already been posted

still funny though

Well then - let's try this one

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.

"Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here
tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a
serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your
immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room
raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if
tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and
utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced
to laughter and snickering. When silence is finally
restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student,
shakes her head and sweetly says,
"Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

hahahah yeha there we go

Owned. That really happened to by the way :lol:

Thought you were banned - in the thirties!!? :aaGreen22

that my friends is why im a switch hitter.