Depression

**GenuinePL** · 12-03-2001, 10:24 PM

Hey guys.
I have a problem. I have been in depression for last 3 months. It happened when me and my girlfirend broke up. Right now I'm over her and trying to get out of this depression shit, but it's not working. It's messes with my gym work out, my daily life and everything that I do. I have to get out of it but just can't figure it out how. I try everyday but I fail. Please help me out, I need to get back to thegym like I used to do (everyday hardcore, great gains). HELP

ptbyjason · 12-03-2001, 10:31 PM

We've all been there man. I have been engaged before, and when we broke up I thought my life was over. I was depressed for quite a while. But when I finally realized that I wanted to make the most of my life, I ended up finding more motivation to get in the best shape of my life. So I had to use the depression and anger of everything that happened to motivate me. It will take time to totally move on, if you are still depressed right now. What you have to do is find a way to make the pain a good thing.

I don't know if that helps or not, but it worked for me. Good luck man, if you ever need someone to talk to, let me know.

**arthurb999** · 12-03-2001, 10:44 PM

Get laid bro. That is the best cure for heartache.

**GenuinePL** · 12-03-2001, 11:01 PM

Thanks for the advice PT, I'll try my best. I have to get out of this shit, casue it's pissing me off and I don't know what to do about. I will give it a try. If you got more advice please share.

Arthur, I already did that and it hasn't worked. LOL

ptbyjason · 12-03-2001, 11:12 PM

This isn't much more help, but it might help some. I will just expand on what I was saying until I can think of other things. I had a goal to get in better shape than I ever had been just because I was no longer with her. Every mile I ran, I thought about what happened. Everytime I started a set, I would think about how much my life sucked at the time. I pounded the weights and the pavement. Everytime you want to slack off, think about walking up to your ex and saying, look what you are missing now. This may all look different when you look back at it in the future. But at the stage you are at now, it's ok to be selfish and cocky. Don't let yourself slow down. Wake up in the morning and think about what you can do to improve your body and pay her back. I hope this helps, I will think about it some more and see if I can think of some other things.

Jason

**partyboynyc** · 12-03-2001, 11:12 PM

that's too much of a robotic response to breaking up.it serves no purpose.it's not that you're battling rejection as much as you are loss.

when you have a loss in life, of any kind, use it as a time to reflect on what is important to you in life.reprioritize what your short term and long term goals are for yourself.you may have lost someone you cared about, but spend time w/ the people who care about you.for each person that negatively effects you there are 100's who will see the good in you.use negativity as a motivator as Jason said.

spend time doing what you enjoy to stay occupied.surround yourself w/ postive people.

TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS OF THE HEART

**GenuinePL** · 12-03-2001, 11:28 PM

Thanks a lot guys, I appreciate your help. I can do this. Thanks for motivation.

**PaPaPumP** · 12-03-2001, 11:29 PM

PT and Partyboy- Both beautifully written. When it comes time to step up, you guys never cease to amaze me. Good work.

**peaker** · 12-04-2001, 12:57 AM

nice advise guys

peaker

**bigtraps** · 12-05-2001, 07:49 AM

TIME...

Time is the only thing that has ever worked for me.. I have been through this enough in the past. I know that everything will be better, and that is Possitve! All you need is time.

No, there is no quick solution IMO. You still have us!!

**Billy Boy** · 12-05-2001, 08:37 AM

Its hard to get out of that rut once you start to slip and I have been there.i found I gradually slipped further and further into it and never noticed but other people around me did.

Remain postive these things are sent to try us out thats what keeps us fresh and alive.One thing I,ve learnt is the lower things get when you push through it life could,nt be sweeter.

Remain focussed and talk about it you get rid of your anger and frustation and that helps.

**GenuinePL** · 12-05-2001, 08:42 AM

I'm trying my best guys, the only part that's killin me is that right now it's the end of the sememster. It messes me up with school work

**pureanger** · 12-05-2001, 08:48 AM

Bro I know what your going through when my first wife divorced me. Big suprise i was ruined for a year and half I still think about the mistakes I have made the only thing you can do is wait it out time will help but its not the cure you need to find people that have the same situation and talk it out.

**Billy Boy** · 12-05-2001, 11:04 AM

Shit this is depressing me I split up with my fiance after putting a small fortune down as a deposit for the wedding I split up with another ex when my girl was 8 mths old and her family tried to do everything to stop me seeing her but 4 yrs on I,m still smiling because it is sorted it took time but I got there thats all what counts.I,ve made major fuck ups but why dwell on them its the past I have a future i,d rather spend time on building it into what I want it to be than worrying about the past.

Get on with your life take it on the chin yeah it was a blow and I don,t want to depress you and hopefully it won,t but it may happen again thats life and nothing you or I do can change the way someone else feels.Every r,ship I,ve been in I thought it was meant to be but it has not been so but do you stop trying ? No you pick yourself up dust yourself down and press on forwards its the way life is.

**pureanger** · 12-05-2001, 12:12 PM

Good advice Billy glad to here it worked out with you

**dane26** · 12-05-2001, 12:16 PM

Originally posted by partyboynyc
that's too much of a robotic response to breaking up.it serves no purpose.it's not that you're battling rejection as much as you are loss.

when you have a loss in life, of any kind, use it as a time to reflect on what is important to you in life.reprioritize what your short term and long term goals are for yourself.you may have lost someone you cared about, but spend time w/ the people who care about you.for each person that negatively effects you there are 100's who will see the good in you.use negativity as a motivator as Jason said.

spend time doing what you enjoy to stay occupied.surround yourself w/ postive people.

TIME HEALS ALL WOUNDS OF THE HEART

wow, that was an awesome repsonse! i didn't know you had that in ya. i'm impressed

**partyboynyc** · 12-05-2001, 02:40 PM

it can't always be jokes ,you know?haha.sometimes i have to flip into serious mode.

**GenuinePL** · 12-05-2001, 02:53 PM

Thanks for your support guys. Yea I have been there before Billy and I slipped really bad on the one before. It really messed me up. I'm doing a lot better on this one, it just keeps me so depressed and I can't afford to slip on college work again. Thanks for advice

**Tobey** · 12-05-2001, 04:04 PM

Listen to the guy's here. You and me are going through the same thing . I'm dealing with it better and better each day. It will take time but you will find that someone special again. It does hurt like hell but hey, your tough. Try keeping your self focoused around positive people and yes get out and date. You do not have to fall in love, your just getting on with your life right now. To tell the truth I really do not think that you could be in love right now. You like me have to many feelings for someone else. But you know what? Those feelings will come back. You just have to get over the pain right now and that will just take time.
IC

To all the guy's that responded to this, ptbyjason, Billy, Dane, Partyboy and the rest. You really surprised me with this post. Especially you Partyboy. You really can come through for a bro when they need it. What better people in the world to be considered friends. You are all tops in my book. Listen to them bro, they were there for me and I know they will be there for you as well. Stay cool and keep your chin up.

Now let's party!!

**Cali** · 12-06-2001, 09:34 AM

I just read this post and was wondering how you're doing PL? I think these guys gave you some great advice, esp impressed with partyboynyc since that was the first serious post I've seen from him!

Hope you're getting better, PL!

**GenuinePL** · 12-06-2001, 09:45 AM

Thanks to you all.

I'm doing just OK Cali, just trying to get through the finals with it, and after that I have a 5 week break to get my stuff mentaly together.

Thanks guys, I knew that I could depend on you.