View Poll Results: Which is your Favorite
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11-08-2005, 10:41 AM #1
Top 4 Funnies, Choose Your Favorite!!!!!!
A man bumps into a woman in a hotel lobby, and as he does, his
elbow touches her breast. They're both quite startled. The man turns to her
and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll
forgive me." She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in
One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts
rubbing his wife's arm. The wife turns over and says, "I'm sorry honey, I've
got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow, and I want to stay fresh." The
husband, rejected, turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls over, and asks
his wife, "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too ?
Bill had been employed in a pickle factory for years. He came
home one day, to confess to his wife he'd had an urge to stick his penis
into the pickle slicer. His wife suggested that he should see a sex
therapist to talk about it, but Bill said he'd be too embarrassed. He vowed
to overcome the compulsion on his own. One day, a few weeks later, he came
home, and his wife could see, at once, that something was seriously wrong.
"What's wrong ?" she asked him. "Do you remember when I told you how I had
this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer ?" "Oh, Bill,
you didn't !!" she exclaimed. "Yes, I did," he replied. "My God, Bill, what
happened? " she asked. "I got fired," he told her. "Bill, I mean what
happened with the pickle slicer? " she questioned. "She got fired too!!!!"
A couple, who'd been married for 50 years, were sitting at the
breakfast table one morning, when the wife said, "Just think, 50 years ago
we were sitting here at this breakfast table." "I know," the old man said.
"We were probably sitting here naked as jaybirds 50 years ago." "Well,"
Granny snickered, "Let's relive some old times." Where upon the two stripped
to the buff and sat down at the table. "You know, honey," the little old
lady breathlessly replied, "My nipples are as hot for you today as they were
50 years ago." "I wouldn't be surprised," replied Gramps, "One's in your
coffee and the other's in your oatmeal !!"
Last edited by CRUISECONTROL; 11-08-2005 at 10:51 AM.
11-08-2005, 12:58 PM #2
11-08-2005, 01:19 PM #3
tie between #1 and #2
11-08-2005, 07:46 PM #4
1 cause ive already heard 2.
11-08-2005, 08:04 PM #5Originally Posted by edmen2
11-08-2005, 10:44 PM #6
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