Homophobes, Read This Sh!t And Tell Me What U Would Do.

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 02:19 PM

This is somewhat of a long story, but I have to go back to the beginning. OK, I was having dinner with a group of ten, fairly diverse group of 30's, 40's, couples, singles, but no homo's. We end up staying at the restaurant for drinks after dinner cuz they have a nice outdoor patio. The waiter who waited on us who was joking around with us throughout the dinner comes outside with his apron and tie off and starts mingling with us. I think nothing of it as the restaurant had closed and the bar was open and I had done this years ago when I was a waiter. At one point after speaking with almost everyone who was there, he looks at me and says "So, what do you do?" I told him I was a dentist. He asked where my office was and yada yada yada, the type of shit you ask someone you just met. He asks if I'm married. I say no. He says "Damn, you must pull a lot of ass in this town." I say something like "Yeah, I do OK, I guess". Then, we proceed to talk about CHICKS for the next 5 minutes, just what types we like, golddiggers, blah blah blah. After that, he turns and starts talking to somebody else and 30 minutes later I leave. . .

The next Monday, my secretary comes to me and says "Your friend Rick is on line 1". I think "My friend Rick? Do I have a friend Rick?" I pick up the phone "Hello?" and hear "HEY, MAN, IT'S THE RICKSTER! HOW WAS YOUR WEEKEND?!" I say "Uhhh, Rickster?" He says "Yeah, man, you know, Rick, the waiter from (omitted)?" I say "OH, yeah right. . . Uhhh, my weekend was good. Listen, Rick, I've got patients to get to so. . . ."

He says "Oh, that's cool. Listen, I just wanted to see when you wanted to get that drink?" What fvking drink was he talking about? "Listen, Rick, I don't know my schedule yet. Gotta go." "Alright, speak to you later."

So, then, there about FIVE moe calls like this over the next few weeks with me blowing him off everytime. It seems like the guy has no friends or something or maybe he needs a wingman, but he's a little creepy so I'm just trying to blow him off.

A few months go by.

I get a message on my machine "Uhhh, Hi. This is Uh, Richard. I'm interested in getting my teeth whitened so if the doctor could call me back at (omitted), I'd like to ask him a few questions" I KNEW IT WAS HIM. So now, I'm a little freaked out and of course, DO NOT call him back or even take his calls. He calls like that A FEW MORE TIMES OVER THE NEXT FEWMONTHS and then gives up. I don't hear anything for a few more months.

It is now 6 months after that dinner night. I haven't heard from him in a few months. I get a call at 9:30AM at the grocery store on my cell phone from ID UNAVAILABLE.

"Hello?"
"Ooooo, I wanna svck your big d!ck, you gorgeous stud!"

It must be one of my friends fooling around so I say
"Wow, you must be desperate cuz my d!ck is REAL dirty!"
"Oooooo, I don't care I just wanna svck it and fvck you and get you off like never before you b!g fvckin stud!"
It's not one of my friends. . . .

IT'S RICK!
"Rick, I know it's you."
*Click* Hangup
A few minutes later . . .
"Hello?"
"You knew it was me?"
"Yeah, how could I forget your creepy voice?"
"So, why did you lead me on that night?"

"What? What do you mean. We shook hands and talked about chicks for five minutes!"
"Yeah, but the way you looked at me. And you fingered my palm."

"I DID NOT finger your palm. I HAVE NEVER fingered ANYONE's palm, especially a MAN'S palm cuz I am 110% straight."
"Well, listen. . . . . Basically, I just wanna svck your dick and fvck the sh!t out of you and. . ."
"WHOA! Stop right there! Understand something Rick. I am 110% straight. Even if youwere a hot chick, I wouldn't do this cuz you're so ****in wierd and creepy. Now listen, if you hang up right now and NEVER call me again or come near me, your health will not be in danger. But understand this, hear me clearly. If you EVER, EVER call me again or come anywhere near me, I swear on my grandmother's grave, I will put you in the ICU drinking through a straw. Is that understood?"
"But. . .:
"ARE WE CLEAR?!"
"Yeah, OK, good luck to you. . . ."

Whew, what would you guys have done? I hate talking to people like that, but I felt like there was no other way. God damn, this pretty face of mine.

**icedudez** · 11-21-2005, 02:29 PM

**** sakes man thats so weird ! i would go to where he works and scare the living shit out of him, hes basically stalking u bro ! get it sorted, smash him!

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 02:31 PM

Originally Posted by icedudez

**** sakes man thats so weird ! i would go to where he works and scare the living shit out of him, hes basically stalking u bro ! get it sorted, smash him!

He doesn't work there anymore and he's seen me so there's no point in finding him just to scare him. I just hope he doesn't vandalize my office or something.

**icedudez** · 11-21-2005, 02:33 PM

lol. thats just not cool man, personally id prob get sum1 else to set about him!

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 02:37 PM

I've got a few goons that I've used before, but they're expensive, so I reserve them for "special occasions". This guy's not worth it and he doesn't deserve it unless he calls me again.

**Booz** · 11-21-2005, 03:29 PM

fvck that shit mate,seems like youv done wats needed to be done,hopefully thats the end of it!!gay fvck!!!

**icedudez** · 11-21-2005, 03:33 PM

lol i hate how "some" gays think they can get away with what chicks can, like we wont **** them up for it- i dont think so!

**icedudez** · 11-21-2005, 03:34 PM

there are so many gays at my gym and it just pisses me off when they are in the changing rooms oogling and me and my buds,fukers!!

BG · 11-21-2005, 03:36 PM

Tell him you want to meet somewhere then beat the shit out of him, you gave him his chance time and time again to leave you alone, now kick his ass for making us read that!!!!!

**stocky121** · 11-21-2005, 03:37 PM

Originally Posted by booz

fvck that shit mate,seems like youv done wats needed to be done,hopefully thats the end of it!!gay fvck!!!

P.S. could i have his number bro ??

**edmen2** · 11-21-2005, 03:41 PM

damn bro sucks to b you! hopefully he gets the picture good luck!

**Mizfit** · 11-21-2005, 03:42 PM

was it good for u hunny:P

joke same thing

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 04:01 PM

Originally Posted by Mizfit

was it good for u hunny:P

joke same thing

I've been hit on a bunch of times down here as I'm right next to the densest gay population in south florida, but nothing like that. Man, if I was gay, I'd definitely have HIV by now with all the action I'd be getting!

**NotSmall** · 11-21-2005, 04:01 PM

You did the right thing bro.
Not wanting to freak you out but if I were you I would at the very least talk to the cops about this, just so they have it all on file in case this escalates in any way. For instance if he suddenly turned up at your home and you broke his jaw it would look alot better for you if the police already knew about him harrassing you. Hell you may even have enough already for a restraining order - dunno much about your laws over that side of the pond.

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 04:04 PM

Originally Posted by NotSmall

You did the right thing bro.
Not wanting to freak you out but if I were you I would at the very least talk to the cops about this, just so they have it all on file in case this escalates in any way. For instance if he suddenly turned up at your home and you broke his jaw it would look alot better for you if the police already knew about him harrassing you. Hell you may even have enough already for a restraining order - dunno much about your laws over that side of the pond.

ANYBODY can get a temporary restraining order over here. You just have to go down to the courthouse and fill out some papers, but a permanent one goes on your public record and therefore, requires much more proof. I think he'll go away, but maybe you're right. I have plenty of cop friends, I'll ask.

**NotSmall** · 11-21-2005, 04:09 PM

Originally Posted by SMYL_GR8

ANYBODY can get a temporary restraining order over here. You just have to go down to the courthouse and fill out some papers, but a permanent one goes on your public record and therefore, requires much more proof. I think he'll go away, but maybe you're right. I have plenty of cop friends, I'll ask.

The other option is you drink a couple of cocktails, call him up, grit your teeth and go with it. He's probably just in it for the thrill of the chase, once he's had his way with you a couple of (dozen) times he'll get bored and move on!

**Kärnfysikern** · 11-21-2005, 04:13 PM

Homosexual or not, male or female any person acting like that towards me would give me the creeps. Hopefully he wont bother you anymore. But incase he calls again dont threaten him or anything incase he tapes it or some wierd shit like that.

***Giantz11*** · 11-21-2005, 04:15 PM

That's a great story but I'd bet you did finger his palm you flaming butt pirate

**Keyser Sozey** · 11-21-2005, 04:18 PM

WOW. I must say that you handled that very well. You did all the right things to avoid this lunatic...I just find it amazing how people get the wrong idea.
Personally, I would have freaked out and probably not done what you did (I have not taken these situations well in the past, and I live very close to the gay population you speak of

...We're neighbors, practically).
I commend your actions.

**oldman** · 11-21-2005, 04:18 PM

Dude that is not a "gay" thing at all.. I mean Yes this happen to be a guy that liked you but this sh!t happens all the time with straight people too. I got stalked by two chicks almost the same way (back in the day) thank God I am married and don't have to hit the bars anymore.

If I were you I would start logging all (if any more) phone calls or encounters with this dude and I would also let someone else you trust know when it happens. Having a stalker is nothing to joke about (gay or not)... sometimes these things end in death.. not trying to scare you or anything but I had to go to the police to get these psycho's off my back and you might consider it if it happens again.. Cover yourself because they might do something and try to put the blame on you.

Just my 2 cents

Oldman

**icedudez** · 11-21-2005, 04:37 PM

Originally Posted by NotSmall

You did the right thing bro.
Not wanting to freak you out but if I were you I would at the very least talk to the cops about this, just so they have it all on file in case this escalates in any way. For instance if he suddenly turned up at your home and you broke his jaw it would look alot better for you if the police already knew about him harrassing you. Hell you may even have enough already for a restraining order - dunno much about your laws over that side of the pond.

do you even need anything for a restraining order?

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 08:28 PM

Originally Posted by Giantz11

That's a great story but I'd bet you did finger his palm you flaming butt pirate

Alright fine, I blew him a kiss, but that cold be taken a hundred different ways!

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 08:31 PM

Originally Posted by icedudez

do you even need anything for a restraining order?

Not really. I went to the courthouse and filled out the paperwork for it, then they serve the person you're filing against and there's a court hearing. At the hearing, both sides are heard, but the judge will hand out a temporary one (one year) pretty easily.

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-21-2005, 08:33 PM

Originally Posted by NotSmall

The other option is you drink a couple of cocktails, call him up, grit your teeth and go with it. He's probably just in it for the thrill of the chase, once he's had his way with you a couple of (dozen) times he'll get bored and move on!

I KNEW I would see that smiley at some point in this thread, you sick bastard!

**3Vandoo** · 11-21-2005, 09:25 PM

I would kill him

**bigron62** · 11-21-2005, 11:43 PM

this ASS CLOWN needs a good ole ass wuppin .. send youre goons over to beat him silly if he calls again ... a LONG nightstick might be what he really needs

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-22-2005, 09:11 AM

Originally Posted by 3Vandoo

I would kill him

You're right! . . . . Damn, if my TV remote is in the safe, where did I leave my Glock?

**shortie** · 11-22-2005, 09:54 AM

Sorry Smyl-this is the funniest shiat I have ever read here!

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-22-2005, 10:59 AM

Originally Posted by shortie

Sorry Smyl-this is the funniest shiat I have ever read here!

Happy to entertain. It'll be funny to me to in about 5 or 6 years.

**Carlos_E** · 11-22-2005, 11:22 AM

Originally Posted by SMYL_GR8

He doesn't work there anymore and he's seen me so there's no point in finding him just to scare him. I just hope he doesn't vandalize my office or something.

He's a desperate homosexual who obviously felt he had nothing to lose.

If some ugly fat chick you had no interest in came on to you in a blatant vulgar manner would you threaten to beat her ass? Probably not. Treat him the same way. You're not interested, leave it at that.

If he is a stalker, call the police. You beating the shit out of him will do nothing beside landing you in jail where you'll end up giving some ass to your cell mate.

**arthurb999** · 11-22-2005, 11:23 AM

LOL. Dude... that's crazy. You handled it very well.

**Carlos_E** · 11-22-2005, 11:25 AM

Originally Posted by icedudez

there are so many gays at my gym and it just pisses me off when they are in the changing rooms oogling and me and my buds,fukers!!

Have you ever considered they're looking at you because you have the smallest penis they're ever seen in their life?

**arthurb999** · 11-22-2005, 11:26 AM

Originally Posted by Carlos_E

If some ugly fat chick you had no interest in came on to you in a blatant vulgar manner would you threaten to beat her ass? Probably not. Treat him the same way. You're not interested, leave it at that.

A fat chick and some gay dude hitting on you like that is ALOT different IMO.

**Carlos_E** · 11-22-2005, 11:30 AM

Originally Posted by arthurb999

A fat chick and some gay dude hitting on you like that is ALOT different IMO.

What's the difference? Either way you're not interested. Because a fat chick hits on you do you suddenly feel threatened that you may be fat to? Because a gay guy hits on you do you suddenly feel threatened that you maybe gay? If no to either, who cares. Tell them both to fvck off and leave it at that.

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-22-2005, 11:31 AM

Originally Posted by Carlos_E

Have you ever considered they're looking at you because you have the smallest penis they're ever seen in their life?

**Carlos_E** · 11-22-2005, 12:12 PM

Originally Posted by SMYL_GR8

**icedudez** · 11-22-2005, 12:58 PM

Originally Posted by Carlos_E

Have you ever considered they're looking at you because you have the smallest penis they're ever seen in their life?

no ! wtf ! are you gay or somethin'? whats your beef?

**icedudez** · 11-22-2005, 12:59 PM

carlos_e, dont slag a slagger !

**NotSmall** · 11-22-2005, 01:39 PM

Originally Posted by Carlos_E

He's a desperate homosexual who obviously felt he had nothing to lose.

If some ugly fat chick you had no interest in came on to you in a blatant vulgar manner would you threaten to beat her ass? Probably not. Treat him the same way. You're not interested, leave it at that.

If he is a stalker, call the police. You beating the shit out of him will do nothing beside landing you in jail where you'll end up giving some ass to your cell mate.

Correct, all this "Beat his ass!" shit is gayer than Richard.

**arthurb999** · 11-22-2005, 02:44 PM

Originally Posted by Carlos_E

What's the difference? Either way you're not interested. Because a fat chick hits on you do you suddenly feel threatened that you may be fat to? Because a gay guy hits on you do you suddenly feel threatened that you maybe gay? If no to either, who cares. Tell them both to fvck off and leave it at that.

There is a big difference. By talking about chicks, clearly the guys isn't gay. Now the guy is calling him like that is completely unacceptable. The final call was asking for a beating. He handled it perfectly and if the guy stalks him anymore, a beating is certainly appropriate.

A skinny can guy hook up with a fat chick (lord knows I've been there) but a normal guy doesn't hook up with gays. He knew the guy wasn't like that and was just being an ass.