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  1. #1
    CRUISECONTROL's Avatar
    CRUISECONTROL is offline Post Whore Extraordinaire Cruising On Autopilot
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    Redneck Letter!!!!!!!!!! OMG too Funny

    Dear Redneck Son;

    I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read fast.

    We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the
    newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home, so
    we moved.

    I won't be able to send you the address because the last Arkansas family
    that lived here took the house numbers when they moved so that they
    wouldn't have to change their address.

    This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I'm not sure
    it works so well though: last week I put a load in and pulled the chain
    and haven't seen them since.

    The weather isn't bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first
    time for three days and the second time for four days.

    About that coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanley said it
    would be to heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut
    them off and put them in the pockets.

    John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried
    because it took him two hours to get me and your father out.

    Your sister had a baby this morning; but I haven't found out what it is
    yet so I don't know if your an aunt or an uncle. The baby looks just
    like your brother....

    Uncle Ted fell in a whiskey vat last week. Some men tried to pull him
    out, but he fought them off playfully and drowned. We had him cremated
    and he burned for three days.

    Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ralph was
    driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other two
    friends were in back. They drowned because they
    couldn't get the tailgate down.

    There isn't much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.

    Love, Mom

    P.S. I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already
    sealed.

  2. #2
    NYGIANTS21's Avatar
    NYGIANTS21 is offline Senior Member
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    haha that's a good one. good luv them red necks

  3. #3
    marcus300's Avatar
    marcus300 is offline AR-Platinum Elite- Hall of Famer
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    ehh?

  4. #4
    panasonicbike is offline Junior Member
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    hahahha

  5. #5
    panasonicbike is offline Junior Member
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    hahahha

  6. #6
    crazykris6 is offline Junior Member
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    funny!

  7. #7
    needmorestrength's Avatar
    needmorestrength is offline Anabolic Member
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    LOL thats funny bro

  8. #8
    kloter1's Avatar
    kloter1 is offline Southern Steel Bodybuilding
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    ma is that you?

  9. #9
    steve0's Avatar
    steve0 is offline NASM~AFPA~CPT
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    too funny bruh

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