quarter life crisis

**lucabratzi** · 01-03-2006, 04:47 PM

since i've been home (dec 16) every single day my dad has been gettin on my case about what i wanna do with my life...i understand his concern but honestly, literally every conversation i have with him is how im wasting time (going to college) and how i have horrible work ethic and im lazy...when we speak it doesnt feel like he's trying to motivate me but put me down...he doesnt understand im not a business mogul like him...at christmas dinner in front of all the family him and my bro. keep goin on about how lazy i am and all i do is workout and do steroids ..i havent juiced (yet) and sorry for having a healthy lifestyle/hobby. as for the lazy and bad work ethic that is bs...i got my first legit job when i turned 15 and kept that job until i was left for college. i also always helped him when he needed help cuttin trees and shit...i want to finish college but all he keeps saying is that its a waste of time...i have accomplished alot in my life, things they dont know about, and the way i see things is that i am alot more ahead of many 20 year olds i know. the average person my age is getting drunk and doin drugs most nights out of the week. dont do shit in school and dont have a job or a very shitty one...sorry for the rant but i just feel like i get no support...hopefully some of u can relate to me..

**FROST** · 01-03-2006, 05:09 PM

I'm goin threw the same shit with my step father, so for the last 2 years i wont talk to him. He can spout off at the mouth all he wants i just ignore him and act like he aint there. Cant do much more than that because i am in his house

I literally say about 2 sentences to him a year.

Brian

**SwoleCat** · 01-03-2006, 05:22 PM

That really sucks.

I've been blessed to have parents who stuck by me with whatever I wanted to do with my life, and always encouraged me.

I'd come out and just tell him how you feel, kind of like you did to us here, and see how he responds. It's tough for me to give advice, because I cannot imagine being ridiculed, especially this time of the year when family and togetherness is so "precious", by my own father.

~SC~

**Evil Predator** · 01-03-2006, 05:34 PM

Thats shitty bro..

My old man worked hard his whole life so I could do what I wanted with my future, but he never, ever pushed me one way or the other. If I was happy shoveling shit in a shit factory, he'd have still been there for me. When I was drunk, he was there for me. When I sobered up, he was there for me. When I finished university with a double major, he was the proudest father alive. Even when I destroyed my hockey career, he never once made me feel like wasnt worth the skin I was made of. When I started dating a girl with a terrible past, my old man was as happy for me as if I had married a doctor. He see's the happieness in my eyes, and that makes him happy.

Like swole said, I cant imagine not having the support of my family, and im thankful every day that theyve been there for me all this time. Im sorry man, if my dad was like yours, I think i'd be better off without him. Putting me down in front of family and friends just isnt cool.

**lucabratzi** · 01-03-2006, 05:54 PM

sucks dont it frost im just tryin to stay straight and do what i feel is the right thing...swole and evil predator u guys are lucky that ur parents supported u like they did, my mom wants me to finish college and wants me to do what i want, which has changed a few times, from wanting to open a gym one day, to being a trainer for pro sports players, to something in the medical feild. but he was persistant on making me go into the business he's in, which is the book industry. its easy money and i could be rich for the rest of my life, but i dont think i would enjoy that kind of work. he is pushing way to fast for me to become this amazing business man. im 20 i want to enjoy my last two years of college and freedom as i see it...like i said ima try to keep my head on straight and get my education....

**steve0** · 01-03-2006, 05:58 PM

i think hes just giving you tough love bruh , maybe thats what his dad did to him, if he wants you to drop out school then ask him what am i supposed to do if i drop out ???? ask him if hes gonna find you a good job with beifits and great pay if you drop out???

**lucabratzi** · 01-03-2006, 06:16 PM

Originally Posted by steve0

i think hes just giving you tough love bruh , maybe thats what his dad did to him, if he wants you to drop out school then ask him what am i supposed to do if i drop out ???? ask him if hes gonna find you a good job with beifits and great pay if you drop out???

i would def. be set up with a great job, either with him when his no compete contract ends or with my bro. but i dont know if i want to jump into that, so quickly...because college life with a part time job is alot better then a full time job..

**steve0** · 01-03-2006, 06:19 PM

i hear ya bro, just do what makes you happy you gotta tell ur pops how you feel, he's a parent so he thinks he knows all, im 22 and have been in ur shoes a few times you just have to express yourself to both ur parents sit them both down and talk it out, it will clear alot of shit up and you will feel better

**lucabratzi** · 01-03-2006, 06:24 PM

im goin to talk to them, clear things up. i've told him i wanna stay in school, and he says well then get a job at so and so business, he expects me to have a full time job and go to school...parents dont understand that even though college may seem easy it isnt, i will get a part time job at some kind of business, but it just doesnt help when he is always on my case every day, it makes me not wanna work...

**pump_hungry** · 01-03-2006, 06:42 PM

i don't understand how any parent would want their kid to drop out of school. i was raised by a single mom, and she's been so supportive, i love her. And the one thing she finds so important is a good education. Even now, when I'm out of school, she keeps encouraging me to read, learn something new. I think she's right.

Do what you feels right lucabratzi. If you feel college is your path, go for it. I can't stand knowing there are parents out there who push so hard on their kids. You think they would care more about their kid's happiness more than anything. I've met people with parents like that, and it just screws with there head. It's never a good thing. Stay strong and true to yourself. That's all I got to say about that.

**lucabratzi** · 01-03-2006, 09:07 PM

wow, just had the second conversation of the day about my future...i dont get how many times i have to tell them what i want to do until they understand, and stop telling me its a waste of time...my bro. is trying to lecture me about how much bullshit school is, and sayin all the right stuff to look good in front of my dad...he was in about 6 different high schools cause of violence towards students and faculty. but serious shit like puttin someone in a coma, and flipping the priciples desk on her...now he's mister rich man cause he was a lucky sperm and has his own business cuase of my dad...but honestly i'm so motivated cuase im goin to seriously strive for straight A's while juicin on the side, and when i come home with 3.0+gpa i will say **** u, get a job and move the **** out...

**darmadoc** · 01-05-2006, 06:44 PM

When I was in college I did nothing but take courses that were aimed at my career. I took no humanities, arts, and tried nothing that I didn't think I could ace. I regret that on a daily basis. You have an opportunity to learn things that may never come your way again. Don't waste it by worrying about what others think. College gives you the opportunity to broaden yourself. An education and a degree are not necesarily the same thing.

**LENNOXLEWIS99** · 01-05-2006, 07:16 PM

I FEEL YA 25 yrs old I think I am going same shit dawg keep working out.
LENNOX IS STILL WAITING ON A U-P.com order very depressed

**notanormalgent** · 01-06-2006, 04:39 AM

I'm in the same boat with my family. Everyone is always busting my chops, even though I have a plan set out my whole family is expecting immediate results. My brother keeps pushing me to get my real estate license, which I will get this year, because he's hustling at making six figures. I plan on getting everything, but right now I'm more in a spiritual/self mastery stage of my life. I'm focusing on what makes me do the things I do, so I really establish and sharpen the tools I need for life. I will move onto the other things when I have built up some decent groundwork on my spiritual level. If you're wondering what I'm talking about...One of the things that I'm learning to do is make everything I do fun and without procrastination. It's all done with passion, as opposed to "discipline", which never lasts long.

**lucabratzi** · 01-06-2006, 07:03 AM

Originally Posted by notanormalgent

I'm in the same boat with my family. Everyone is always busting my chops, even though I have a plan set out my whole family is expecting immediate results. My brother keeps pushing me to get my real estate license, which I will get this year, because he's hustling at making six figures. I plan on getting everything, but right now I'm more in a spiritual/self mastery stage of my life. I'm focusing on what makes me do the things I do, so I really establish and sharpen the tools I need for life. I will move onto the other things when I have built up some decent groundwork on my spiritual level. If you're wondering what I'm talking about...One of the things that I'm learning to do is make everything I do fun and without procrastination. It's all done with passion, as opposed to "discipline", which never lasts long.

i like the way u view things...i know it sounds typical but it feels good knowing there are other people going through the same bullshit...just keeping my head straight...now im off to some sales meeting my dad forced me to go to...