Marry My Sister-in-law

[gymnutt]

I found this on craigslist, she NOT my sister-in-law. Thought it might get a couple chuckles, especially if you have or have yet to uproost a deadbeat housemate from the nest.

http://www.craigslist.org/eby/w4m/124326817.html

Reply to: [email protected]
Date: 2006-01-10, 7:24PM PST


I have decided that we are going to find a husband for his sister.

About my sister-in-law:
She is 22, doesn't work, and is currently living with a 50-year old guy who she is supposed to marry but we think he is backing down. She moved in with him because he offered her a place to stay and a job taking care of his senile mother, but now she isn't taking care of the mother. She tried to get her mother to date the guy, but her mother said "no". The guy then gave my sister-in-law a cubic zirconia which we think is an engagement ring, but they aren't getting married quick enough for us.

My sister-in-law's recent jobs have included restaurant hostess, escort, bondage model, caretaker and cleaning lady. She wants to be a psychologist and go to school. However, we tried to get her into school before and she never followed up on anything.

I think she is good at cooking and cleaning, I am not sure as you will have to motivate her to get up off the couch. She is good at sex and can also function as a dominatrix. Anybody who takes her will have an interesting sex life. Note: She prefers open marriage.

My sister-in-law is ok looking. She's about a 4.5. I have not seen her lately. She has red hair usually, some piercings, a tattoo and is currently still thin. She needs work on her teeth (to be paid for by future husband). She has some existing arrest warrants that she still needs to take care of (lawyer to be provided by husband). She needs the warrants taken care of to get her driver's license.

You:
A man 18-100. Heterosexual preferred. Must be non-violent.
You own a house where my sister-in-law will live and take full-financial responsibility for her. Must provide proof of ownership of house.
You must have a room for my sister-in-law. My sister-in-law likes her own room. She likes to have a hotplate and a refrigerator in her closet so she doesn't have to go into the kitchen. She also needs a TV in her room.
You live in someplace that is NOT Oakland or Berkeley or anywhere near there. South Bay location is excellent as well as peninsula and North Bay.
You must have expanded cable. My sister-in-law likes to watch "The Gotti's" on A&E.
You must provide a car for my sister-in-law. She likes to drive her current fiance's car but she doesn't have a license or insurance.

How do you marry my sister-in-law?
Provide a short bio and picture of yourself, list your income, whether you own a house, location, phone number where we can reach you and model of car sister-in-law can drive. We then pick who we like and interview potential candidates. Then be prepared to meet her and get a marriage license on that day, pending her inspection of your house/car/room.

What do you get out of this?
You get my sister-in-law. I also have a used Linen's N'Things card with a balance of $17.34. This will be your wedding present.

[USfighterFC]

LMAO.............a 4.5......hilarious

[-DedicateD-]

I also have a used Linen's N'Things card with a balance of $17.34. This will be your wedding present.

HAHA

[juicy_brucy]

This reminds me of my girls stupid whore sister that used to free loaded off of us and slept with all my friends....

[hardgainer12]

hahahaha

[Hard Head]

This reminds me of my girls stupid whore sister that used to free loaded off of us and slept with all my friends....

Free booty for your buds, you the man!

[QuieTSToRM33]

lol hahaha

[Tren Bull]

haha, her teeth need work? this is almost too absurd to be real.

[jeremy11]

wow lol i hope it was a joke when the guys posted it on there

[aadrenaline]

best part is the linens and things card!! shit for that id jump all over it!

hahahahahaahahah j/k