Childhood experiences

Big Show 23 · 08-16-2002, 08:57 AM

Do you think that your past childhood experiences can have an affect on your adult life.I totally believe this to be true because in truth you never forget the good and bad experiences you had as a child.I for instance had a pretty hard childhood(not hard in the sense of poverty)but still it wasn't fun

1)I spent most of my early childhood in and out of hospitals from age 5-13

2)Up untill high school I was always the target of bullies and groups of people picking on me and I was always ostracised from group activities.And even the teachers,principal and Guidence Counsellor weren't a big help.They always labled me as an immature trouble maker.In fact from grade 6-9 with the exception of a few people,fellow classmates really detested me and every student in that grade in my school days never accepted me.And the label of trouble maker stuck with me for a while.

In fact in my final year of jr.high even though I had sufficent grades the principal wanted to hold me back because she thought I was too immature for my first freshman year of high schol.

3)And for a long time(age 18-21)I was often called an unemployed loser,stupid and threatened constantly with being thrown out on the streets.

And there are some more things I could say but I choose to keep that between myself and mt friends and family.I know that these experiences totally played havoc with my self confidence(which as of this day I'm still trying to build up)This is part of the reason I took up bodybuilding because I believe a strong body = a strong mind.And I never want to be the person I was,I want to and will be a strong confident working man with a beautiful girlfriend. When I achieve this it'll be my way of saying "Screw you world I'm a success"

**Cali** · 08-16-2002, 09:20 AM

Sorry to hear it was so tough on you growing up. Experiences growing up definitely mold who you are or how you react to situations when you get older. You just have to hope that you really "grow up" and become stronger because of the tough times and are thankful for the good. Do something with your life that you enjoy and makes YOU happy, and don't worry about what the people from the past think or thought of you. You're the one who matters.

**tigress** · 08-16-2002, 09:48 AM

Martial arts helped me get over past anger and find some focus. A good spouse didn't hurt either.

**palme** · 08-16-2002, 10:13 AM

Personaly i think my teen years was so bad because i never had a male rolemodel. Got into alot of trouble and had weekly (sometimes daily) contact with the police and was almost sent to juvy(?) but i got true it.

Stay strong!

**BigLou** · 08-16-2002, 10:13 AM

Tough times are good in a way to thicken your skin (metaphorically speaking). If there is a person hasn't had any major problems they are sensitive to the slightest disturbance.

Big Show 23 · 08-16-2002, 01:03 PM

When I would watch those talk shows where people confront their bullies telling them much the bullying negatively impacted their life I would laugh calling them whiners and pathetic losers.But now I've grown up and I know better.To this day I can still remember and list names of people who were cruel to me in my younger days.This type of thing stays with you for a long time.

On a good note someone I haven't seen since my elementary/Jr.High years(I'm 23.5 yrs right not)saw me biking and he stopped to say hi and out of the blue he apologized to me for being such an ass in those days to me.He said that he felt real bad about it and wanted to at least say he's sorry.That IMO took a lot of courage and shows a lot of class

Big Show 23 · 08-16-2002, 10:20 PM

I know for a fact that bodybuilding has helped my confidence immensely. I'm a lot more assertive then I used to be although I'm still a work in progress.Whereas before if you got in my face I'd bow my head like a puppy,now I might still walk away because I will always try to avoid confrontation.But the difference is that if you won't let me walk away or keep in my face I will turn face and put you in your place.

**tatty** · 08-16-2002, 11:23 PM

Good for you bro. I too had a somewhat difficult adolescence...Not so much family or bullying or anything, but I fell into the wrong crowd, dropped from a good school and things snowballed into a bag of nonsense for me.

I also picked up a phobia anxiety disorder...almost like panic attacks, but I'm on my way to trying to lead a normal and healthy life. I figure things like this only make you stronger.

Believe it or not, picking up a religion or even a spiritual activity can help. It certainly doesn't hurt, but I'm going to try something called Qi Gong which focuses on mind, body and soul. It's hard for a skeptic like me, but my parents fully believe in it so much that I'm going to take a stab.

Good luck!

**maguilagorilla** · 08-17-2002, 05:57 PM

i think most of us had some truoble growing up, my problem was my parents were immigrants, and all they knew was how to work in the crop fields which i started to work in when i was only 7 yrs old didnt have much of a childhood what with me always working in the summer and sometimes into the school year ,but my parents were and still are real loving its just the straw that some people draw you know? Any way it made me really apreciate hard work and what we sometimes take for granted i dont do that type of work anymore and im making sure that my kids never have to, but sometimes you just gotta take on the chin and cowboy up you know. You cant let outside pressures make you you gotta make yourself 'nuff said

**partyboynyc** · 08-18-2002, 06:54 AM

my childhood wasn't so hot and i'm sure that's why i'm metally fucked up!!my mom was the best growing up though.can't blame dukes!!!but yeah, childhood shit still drives me insane at leats once a day.

**kreper69** · 08-18-2002, 07:22 AM

I don't think anyone had the perfect leave it to beaver childhood. I can relate to most of the stories that i read on here. I think i was marked from birth to have a crappy childhood (maybe cause i came out side ways, and I was dropped on my head multiple times as a baby) on a serious note i had a bad childhood. my mom disowned me when i was young, and i had to go live with my grandmother. i had no friends, and all my uncles were marked by the police to be vagrants. so automatically since i had there last name i was marked as a vagrant too. nobody's parents wanted there kids to hang out with me cause all the parents knew my uncles so automatically thought i was just like them..
i went to live with my father for awhile, and then my mom came back in the picture. we lived pretty good for awhile then my dad got laid off of work everything turned to shit, and my dad commited suicide in the upstairs bathroom. i left the house, and been on my own since i was 16 years old. i got put into a home cause i was living on the street in NYC when i turned 18 i joined the service, and everything has been better. i lost my leg when i was in the service, and thought i would go out like my dad. now i'm training again (sucks a little cause i'm limited to excercises) i got a great job, friends,and a awsome fiance.(if it wasn't for her fine latina @ss i wouldn't be here) things are turning out for the better. i guess it goes to show for every bad thing that happens to you whether it be as child or adult there always going to be a positive reaction in some aspect. (God has a plan for all of us)
peace

**BigLou** · 08-18-2002, 09:09 PM

I don't know if I can talk for everyone but I know the switch that starting creating balance in my life was weight training. It is very comforting that there are other like me that had issues and resorted themselves in a positive way. Much love you all of you out there.

**tatty** · 08-18-2002, 09:52 PM

Weight training was also a key ingredient in my turning point in life...It's amazing the amount of confidence it can evoke.

Good luck everyone in your endeavours.

**Tobey** · 08-18-2002, 10:05 PM

Emotional turmoil is a very powerful thing. Most often one (especially as with adolescents) will not even recognize the turmoil as it is happening. But it usually surfaces later on in life and how one deals with it is important. Sure there were times in my child hood that I was left alone. Hell I was on my own at 15. But I like to think that it made me stronger for all the mistakes that I made along the way. Some peoples personalities will not allow them to see threw this. Some can not learn from their past mistakes, but I like to think that most of us walking around in the free world have a morale obligation to try and better ourselves. I know I am much more confident of myself now than I was earlier in life.
IC