sick of seeing people being mean to their kids--pisses me off

**Tapout** · 10-30-2002, 01:35 AM

it seems like every time i'm in a store i see someone giving their kids a bad time. yes i know they can drive you crazy--my little boy is 4 yo and he can be crazy in a store.but people get carried away.
kids are the greatest gift God can give. usually you have a child by choice and they did not choose to come here. i would not trade my son and being a dad to him for nothing. i get pissed when i hear some assinine person getting on their kid for wanting a drink or having to go to the bathroom. yelling at them in a store telling them to hurry up-- complaining entire time their kid is doing the task. they look over at me and bitch about their kid i tell them to shut up and be thankful they have a healthy child and quit complaining because before you know it that child will be grown and gone(i talk that nice when i'm in a good mood usually its a little rougher)

remember many times in our lives we are polite and nice to a stranger who dont give a shit about us---but we come home and yell at the child who is annoying us only because they've waited all day to see you(just because they missed us and wanted to show some love)or yell at your spouse--these are the people who love us and we care the most about yet treat them the worse.
you never know what tommorow will bring everyone you have could be gone(hopefully not)and it will be too late to say i'm sorry or i love you. be good to your family and kids they are a gift.

**seniormateus** · 10-30-2002, 03:38 AM

This is the best thread I've read on AR. Let us live life with the joy of children and may we have the wisdom of our grandparents to guide our inner child through this journey. We build powerful minds and bodys to use with our powerful hearts to protect our children from evil. People who can't understand how beautiful life is and inflict their misery on defensless children and animals will eventually have a big debt to pay come judgement day. I personally like to turn the tables on these people. The next cat they kick could come back as a lion. The next kid they scare, could come back as a powerful man and make that will make them TAPOUT if they get that lucky. Great thread bro!!!

**Totenkopf** · 10-30-2002, 05:38 AM

Good read Tapout
You sound alot like myself i just hate everyone that isnt my family :}
Drives my wife crazy that im so anti social. And god help anyone that hurts my children. I must add that i think everyone is somewhat guilty of ignoring thier kids,when you come home from a tough day all you want is an hour of peace then you can deal with the little animals :}

**palme** · 10-30-2002, 05:44 AM

I hate kids

There expensive they smell bad and they scream!

**123A** · 10-30-2002, 07:20 AM

PALME, you never had a kid, i can see...

**palme** · 10-30-2002, 07:27 AM

LOL no bro not that i know of hehe!

Was a joke people.

**Tapout** · 10-30-2002, 09:21 AM

seniormateus and totenkopf thanks bros couldnt agree more
senior--wow deep bro

palme was that you at the store the other day---lol
i know it was a joke you got to be alright to have dog in avaitar---to some their pets(i got a dog and 2 cats--and also get pissed at people who hurt animals)are their kids

**Babyweight** · 10-30-2002, 09:30 AM

Man Tapout.....I don't even have kids, and you still made me cry...
It is all so true about strangers and our loved ones.

**thegame01** · 10-30-2002, 09:37 AM

hey bro nice thread .It's nice to hear the softer side of the boys of AR once in a while. I agree 100% eventhoughi have no kids myself yet .

GZ

**nuke** · 10-30-2002, 09:38 AM

Tapout- A bad ass and a big heart !

I like that I too have a 2 year old....I must agree They can drive us to the brink of insanity. But shes mine and I love her....Kids R gonna be kids and like Tapoout says :
remember many times in our lives we are polite and nice to a stranger who dont give a shit about us---but we come home and yell at the child who is annoying us only because they've waited all day to see you(just because they missed us and wanted to show some love)or yell at your spouse--these are the people who love us and we care the most about yet treat them the worse.

I LOVE THAT BRO ! Even me, DAD OF THE YEAR, Could learn from that !!

Peace,
Nuke

BTW Stop crying Baby...Ur too cute !

**ripsid** · 10-30-2002, 09:52 AM

I have a son 6, daughter 9 & 7. My girls are wonderful and my son is well....He's me x400! Which means he's a ball breaker extraodinare! He's got a few problems as far as adhd and impulse disorder (which i believe I have and was never tested) he can be the nicest kid in the world and the biggest prick all in the same minute! At 6 am he'll be up and bouncing off the F'N walls, he'll yell at you and growl at you and ...I love my boy more than anything on the face of this planet. I tell him all the time just like this "Carlo...yes dad...love ya boy!, love you dad" 50x's a day. He pushes mine and my fiance's buttons but that's ok. He's a VERY smart kid, who we hope and pray will grow out of this stuff. I mean he turned 6 in sept and he's already in 1st grade and when it comes to the work he's in the tops of his class! but his behavior is over the top. No matter what he does, I love him, granted you have to spank him sometimes, and get sick to my stomach when it happens, but I try to explain the love and why I don't want to do it and why he needs to do so and so. Trust me when you have a kid that has issues it's trying, but it's not something I regret! My boy is the world and it's my goal to make him the best he can!

**tatty** · 10-30-2002, 10:35 AM

I feel the same way, also when boyfriends or husbands make a big scene and make their gf/wives cry. Hey, it's not my business but boy it makes me feel like I need to rectify the situation between the two...

***Shredz*** · 10-30-2002, 11:44 AM

Amen!

**palme** · 10-30-2002, 11:48 AM

JJ the more i read your post you become more and more a A++ guy in my book. Your views are real and i like that.

But can someone please explain the corner thing? What kind of punishment is it to sit in a corner?

**ripsid** · 10-30-2002, 12:12 PM

When it comes to discipline every child reacts differently. My girls are like just raising your voice gets there attention and my son you need to get his attention. I don't give in but I do like to put a smile on his face, and I let him know you have to EARN things. I'm not going to give you anything, you need to earn the Yu-gi-yo cards or what ever.
I know when I was growing up, and well I think I needed it, but I got my ass kicked and I deserved it! I also know that I wish I had listened to my father and didn't need to get my a$$ kicked. I try to teach my son based on that.
The big joke is he has my ex-wifes gene's and my son (according to the doc) should be about 6-8 and upper 200's (thank god I'm 5-10 and my pop is 5-5) so my dad says you better get the upper hand now before he beats your ass when he's older!!!!! Funny!

**nuke** · 10-30-2002, 12:29 PM

Palme - The corner or " time-out" a we call it in my house, is time the child spends alone and not getting to watch tv, play,etc....
Since my kids just 2 we ask her if she wants to go in her room fo time out...
9 out of 10 times she says " no daddy " and chills. The 1 in 10 chance that she says yes, I'm like " OH SHIT NOW WHAT !!" LOL !!!!

But JJ you are a great dad and it sounds like your kids are growing on the right path.. Its sad that today we as parents have to watch what we do or say in public....( Some people think its extreme to even tap your kids hand ! ) But thats a whole other post....

I think its even harder when you have to raise a girl..... I am the hero always and moomys the cruel evilina... ( Iknow I git the shit beat out of me when i needed it.)

I have since grown up to be a member of AR !! ( LOL !!!!!)

**Totenkopf** · 10-30-2002, 03:20 PM

Damn this is the Best thread i have read yet. Hats off to everyone that has posted. JJ you hit the nail on the head i think you should publish this and it should be required reading before anyone can have Kids.
There is only one problem with this if your wife/Husband doesnt do the same home can be living HELL. My wife will not let me discipline her 8 yr old daughter,The girl gets away with everything and it drives me crazy.
Ill give you an example my wife and i had a lil girl together when she was around 1 yrs old i saw her 7 yr old punch the younger one as hard as she could. I freaked out almost killed her my wife sided with her kid. events like this that happen often(not quite extrem) drive me away from
her when i am suppose to treat her like my own. I feel it is key to be on the same page or there will be constant conflict within the home (kinda Like Mine) :{

**Tapout** · 10-30-2002, 03:30 PM

thanks for all the replys guys
thanks nuke(alsp for pm)
thanks babyweight
i feel ya ripsid and from what you wrote your doing good
thanks jj

i can tell you jj is an excellent dad,his kids are great and they are the kids i love my little one to play with. they respect and listen.yes hes good at discipline but hes also a big softe to them until they need different and his kids love him to death

the only thing i see wrong with jjs statements is the fact of letting their kids starve-i agree probably no one here would but too many so called parents let their kids go without but they still have their cigs and beer. and that is a sad world --i see it way too much

i was very big into discipline,my boy acted great then we found out he has cystic fibrosis and it changed me for a long time. i say for about 6 months i could not discipline him and you could tell ,it took almost a year to get a grip on him and his dr saying hes going to live a long life and be ok but without discipline he will be in trouble so got to discipline. once i got over the shock and realized he is very healthy and probably going to live a regular,normal and long life i started the discipline again and had to play major catch up.
for any parent who loves their child it is hard to do any thing to that child but like jj said you have to for them---just after give them a hug and tell them you love them.

dont get me wrong-- i didnt start this thread because someone disciplined their child--i started it cause it pissed me off to see someone going off on their child and acting like they are a burden,because they wanted to use restroom and get water out of fountain----the way that lady(seen many but this was the breaking point)bitched and rolled her eyes ---i wanted to roll her head off her shoulders
believe me i let her know what i thought about her

**ripsid** · 10-31-2002, 07:48 AM

Totenkopf > Hey bro I know what it's like. I was married and she had a son, he was a good kid, but man he would get away with shit all the time. Thank god I got out of that marriage (I had 2 kids). Now I'm engaged and she's awesome man! I love her to death, she has a daughter and she's good, but my girl was letting her get away with alot and my son (who lives with me) would be the bad guy. We've been through alot in the last 3 years, but it's finally starting to work out as far as equal discipline. It's tough!!!!!! Real tough! but she's a good girl and when she gets out of line I let her know it! It's tough, because you're only the "step" and you don't have "the right", but you pay for her you do more than the father and then when it comes to discipline you can't. I think it's horse shit! If she hit my kid I'd flip! Good luck bro! We "Steps" have to stick together!

**maguilagorilla** · 10-31-2002, 07:52 PM

i agree with everything juice is saying i think the world needs more "discipline" alot of kids get their way and turn out to be nothing but "grown up kids" my father was very hard on me and he always ran a strict household, but he always let us know why were being punished (scolded or spanked) and when he could he would let us have things we wanted there was eleven kids in my home and dad or mom couldnt be as tolerant as he probably wished ,but it tuaght us to be tuogh mentally and emotionally anyway i wanna take this time to thank my father for being a man and making one outta me!!...... man this was a great thread, i think we should vote it thread of the month if there was such a thing!!

**Tapout** · 11-01-2002, 01:28 AM

thanks mag
my parents were (still are and i'm 35)the same way--i didnt argue with them theyd but my behind BUT on the other hand they did more things with me than any friend ever did. my dad would come home from work and would play baseball or basketball with me every day no matter how tired. every weekend my parents would take me to the beach or my dad would take me fishing. we'd get ice cream and my mom would take me in the pool when we got home. you know i cant tell you 5 toys i got throughout my life(i got many but not that important) but i can tell you things they did with me--thats the things i remember not the toys.
i aways say if i'm half the dad to my boy that my dad is to me i'm going to be great

**Rugby13** · 11-01-2002, 10:17 AM

I agree totally. I don't have kids of my own...yet, but I live with my girlfriend and her family. Great family but her mom is SO hateful towards her and her little brother and it's not like she's pissed off or tired from the days work....she's a housewife and complains everyday how she wishes people would just leave her alone...DRIVES ME INSANE!!!!
When me and her little bro (11yrs) play fight she sends him to his room because she doesn't want to hear him...like he's giving her a headache. This morning me and my girlfriend were leaving for school, I was waiting in the car for her, she just ran back to tell her mom bye and that she loves her. Her mom came to the door and when she told her, this was her moms response "You made me come open the door for you to tell me that!!!" And she turned around and walked back inside. I could've jumped out the car and strangled her but I need the accomodation now so I'll keep my mouth shut till I move out

... Sorry bro, just me venting!! I get so pissed at people that just can't find ANY good in ANYTHING!!! Life's not that damn bad!!

**DeFiNeDMasS** · 11-01-2002, 10:58 AM

i don't have any kids but it pisses me off really bad when i see stupid ass parent that put their little kid in like a harness with a leesh(sp?) like there a dog or something,it horrible the kids runs or just walks and he gets snagged back by the leesh. i feel like slappin the crap out of the parent.

**Tapout** · 11-01-2002, 10:59 PM

rugby i couldnt agree more
every day i wake up i'm glad i can see,hear,walk,talk and able to train.--people are always bitching and dont realize how good they got it

**sicilian40** · 11-02-2002, 02:28 PM

tap out man i agree with you 100%. kids can be annoying and they cant drive you nuts but thats cuz they are kids...imagine how our parents felt wish us...i know i drove mine nuts but hey they still loved me ...my lil niece is the absolute cutest girl i have seen in my life and shes nuts ! she drives me insane but when i put her back in her little bed and pull her little covers over her i cant help but smile because i know this little girl is one of those little things in life that mean so much but come in such little packages. i only see my niece a few times a week because i take care of her when my bro is at work and so is his wife but i love the little girl, i do know how annoying kids do get i had 2 little sisters and the age dif between the youngest one is 10 years...they are annoying sometimes but you gotta love em...especially if they are your child, some people would do anything to have a child and not to be lonely..to have someone that looks up to them the way someones child does. I know this is so because thats how i felt when i was a child. My father was the most amazing person in the world and i looked up to him even till this day. I try as hard as i can to even be a eight of that man because even after a 12 hour day and getting shit at work and being tired and sweaty he would still kiss my mom when he walked in the door and hug us and ask us how are day was even though our days never changed...the bottom line is appreciate little kids...appreciate em before they grow out of your life

**Tapout** · 11-02-2002, 11:07 PM

agree sicilian thanks for your input

**TestTubeBaby** · 11-03-2002, 12:27 AM

ripsid, your son sounds ALOT like me when i was younger, he should grow out of most of it, except maybe the ADHD part. im 17 and still battle ADHD and impulse, you learn to control it as time passes on though.

**Tapout** · 11-06-2002, 12:59 AM

got a good friend with adhd and hes doing fine just have to keep his intrest

**m16a2** · 11-06-2002, 01:52 AM

Originally posted by palme
I hate kids

There expensive they smell bad and they scream!

Although I share this opinion (and I know you were joking, but I'm not), I totally agree with Tapout's post, and I agree even more with JJ's post. Good posts guys, very insightful. There has to be a balance between discipline and affection. These are two concepts that often appear to clash, and its important to make sure you don't confuse them. Kids are just like animals, you have to teach them by example, and by guidance. If they screw up, you have to punish them, and you gotta be consistant about it like JJ pointed out. Showing love isn't giving in to your kid's every want and impulsive desire. Love is teaching your child the knowledge he will need the rest of his life. If your kid breaks down in toysRus and starts crying because you won't buy him talking fido, the robotic dog, and you give in -- that sends a message to the child that breaking down and crying in public places gets him rewards/desired objects. It's extremely harmful to an adolescents mind to give in when this happens.

Parenthood seems dreadful, props to all you guys who taking on the challenge.

**Tapout** · 11-07-2002, 11:32 AM

thanks rampage
parenthood can be very hard and it is a challenge
you have to discipline your child but you hate to.it shows great love to hug your child but it takes great love to discipline.
when a parent says it hurts me more to spank than it hurs you ---i believe it now

yes rampage its hard to raise a child but its not dreadful---i would not change it for all the money in the world.
there is nothing better than doing jui jitsu with my 4 y.o.,us lifting weights in the garage,waking up in the morning and him stareing at you saying lets go eat(waking up being stared at is a little spooky till you get used to it) and to see a childs face on Christmas morning there's nothing better.
you do have to be ready for the challenge though

**hacksign** · 11-11-2002, 12:51 AM

Ah, I would beat the shit out of my kid if he got outta line, hell, I would beat your kid if he pissed me off doing something stupid out in public. I hate seeing little bratty fuckers running around with no parental supervision tearing the store apart,

if anyone sees this regardless if it's your kid or not slap the little fucker.

**m16a2** · 11-11-2002, 04:35 AM

Originally posted by hacksign
Ah, I would beat the shit out of my kid if he got outta line, hell, I would beat your kid if he pissed me off doing something stupid out in public. I hate seeing little bratty fuckers running around with no parental supervision tearing the store apart,

if anyone sees this regardless if it's your kid or not slap the little fucker.

calm down bro, sounds like your real stressed bro, or drunk. if you ever hit my kid, i'd cut your heart out, but that's just me.

**m16a2** · 11-11-2002, 05:30 PM

When you get to the point where you are actually contemplating assaulting an unruly child, you should probably take a deep breath and rush to the nearest bar/pub. Honestly, as much as it bothers me to see little brats misbehave, it would disturb me much more to see a stranger harm someone's child.

**ripsid** · 11-12-2002, 01:33 PM

Parenthood seems dreadful, props to all you guys who taking on the challenge.

Rampage...Man, I love being a dad! and trust me I never wanted to be married let alone a father. My kids can put a smile on my face after the worst days! Sure my kids can be more frustrating than chinese arithmatic, but you know what the good out ways the bad. I almost tear up with joy when I see my kids laughing and playing and when they wake me up in the morning it get's no better!

**Cali** · 11-12-2002, 02:20 PM

I hate it when people are mean to their kids, but I also hate it when you try to discipline your child(ren) and some dumbass looks at you like you're the worst person in the world. My friend actually had DHS knocking on her door because someone heard her raise her voice when she was trying to get her boys to straighten up and they turned her in for abuse.

I took my son to story time at the library last night and found out when we got there that it was pajama party night and we were supposed to bring a flashlight. Thankfully we got there early enough to run home only to realize ours was no where to be found. My son was so bummed cuz he didn't want to be the only one without one (and someday I'm going to need one anyway) so we ran to the dollar store. I was trying to get him to hurry through the store so we wouldn't be late and the lady behind the counter looked at me like I was a bitch. Some days I just hate people.