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  1. #1
    Jack87's Avatar
    Jack87 is offline Retired Vet
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    Talking Joke of the Day #2

    A guy out of town on business stops by the hotel bar and sits to have
    a drink. At the other end is an attractive woman with whom he
    occasionally exchanges a glance. After the second round he saddles up
    next to her and they begin a conversation where the man explains his
    reason for being in town. The woman listening explains that she's
    working the bar and offers him a hand job. "How much?" inquires the
    businessman. "Two hundred?" replies the hooker. "Two hundred dollars
    for a hand job, isn't that a little pricey?" She responds by leading
    him to the door and showing him a red Ferrari parked by the
    curb. "You see that car; I bought it with the money I made from
    giving hand jobs!" Intrigued but undecided, he hems and haws yet
    ultimately decides to bring her back to his room where she gives him
    an unbelievable hand job.
    The next night he ventures downstairs and runs into her again. This
    time she tells him that she can give him a blow job for $500.00.
    After him questioning that price she takes him by the hand and points
    out an apartment building across the street. "You see that building,
    I bought that with the money I made giving head!" Again he succumbs
    and takes her to his room where she gives him the best toe-curling
    blow job he's ever gotten! That night he tosses and turns thinking
    about what the pussy must be like. The following evening he sees her
    and immediately propositions her for sex. Again she takes him by the
    hand, leads him to the door and points across the river to the
    neighboring town. "You see that city over there?"
    "No, don't tell me you own that town with the money you made selling
    pussy?"
    "No, but if I had one…"

  2. #2
    BigMike J's Avatar
    BigMike J is offline Anabolic Member
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    Ewww man that's raw, but funny

  3. #3
    fast's Avatar
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    hihihi

  4. #4
    clockworks's Avatar
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    hehe, thats funny...=) lemmie try one. i heard this one the other night...

    so there's this doode at a bar and he's down in the dumps, all teary eyed and drinking his sorrows away. well then this lady comes in and sits down at the bar and orders a drink. he notices that she's upset also, he can tell that she's been crying as well. they sit there for a while, both drinking their drinks, kinda noticing each other, catching each other's teary eyes and what not. finally the man asks her what is the matter. she responds by telling him that her husband left her because she is too kinky. the man's eyes light up and he exclaims that his wife also left him because he's too kinky! so they start taking and continue drinking and they decided to go home together. so back at her place, she leaves him in the living room while she retreats to her bedroom to prepare for some kinky sex. she got dressed in her leather dominatrix outfit, readied her cat o nine tales, made sure she had some lube left, found her handcuffs, dusted off her gag, charged her nipple shocker, cleaned off her chinese anal love beads, warmed up her three prong anal dildo, and finally got some whipped cream. once she was all ready, she went back to the living to find the man fully dressed, ready to leave, and infact, on his way out the door. "where are you going? we haven't even started!", she exclaims. the man replies, "huh? i've already fucked your dog and shit in your purse."

    -- clocky baby

  5. #5
    Jack87's Avatar
    Jack87 is offline Retired Vet
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    That's the best....

  6. #6
    ripped4fsu's Avatar
    ripped4fsu is offline Anabolic Member
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  7. #7
    BigMike J's Avatar
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    .lol:

    that 2nd one was funny.

    I have one 2 but im not sure if it's is inappropriate not.. Mods if you feel it is delete it.. This joke is sorta stupid but im gonna tell it anyway.

    Little junebug is at home with his brothers/sisters. Anyway little junebug wants to go play so he say, "Mommy, mommy can i have some money to go down to the pool hall to play" So his mom gives him some money to go play. Well while on his way to the pool hall 5 chiggers jump out from nowhere and beat the shit out of him and take his money. So the little junbug runs home and says,"MOMMY MOMMY FIVE CHIGGERS JUMPED OUT FROM NOWHERE AND BEAT ME UP AND TOOK MY MONEY." His mom stunned by what her son just said, his mom says, "Now now son those aren't chiggers they're chigros"

    HAHAHAHA .

    PEACE.

  8. #8
    Jack87's Avatar
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    Where the hell did you hear that one.... Little JuneBug... LMFAO

  9. #9
    BigMike J's Avatar
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    Some dude at work told me that joke about 3 years ago.. i laughed my ass off when he first told me, but it' has since lost it's humor with me.

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