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  1. #1
    KunipshunFit's Avatar
    KunipshunFit is offline Lounge Lizard
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    TOP 8 Moron's of 2002 (ALL TRUE) - Joke of the day for Feb 27

    1. Will The Real Dummy Please Stand Up? AT&T fired President John Walter
    after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a
    $26 million severance package.

    2. With A Little Help From Our Friends: Police in Oakland, California spent
    two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside
    his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the
    man
    was standing beside them in the police line, shouting "Please come out and
    give yourself up."

    3. What Was Plan B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped
    a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller
    machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his
    own bank accounts.

    4. The Getaway! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and asked for
    all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he
    tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours
    until
    police showed up and grabbed him.

    5. Did I Say That??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery
    suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup.When detectives
    asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, "Give me all your money
    or I'll shoot," the man shouted, "That's not what I said!"

    6. Are We Communicating?? A man spoke frantically into the phone, "My wife
    is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" "Is this her
    first child?" the doctor asked. "No!", the man shouted, "This is her
    husband!"

    7. Not The Sharpest Tool In The Shed!! In Modesto, California, Steven
    Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch
    without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun, but
    unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellllllooooooo!)

    8. The Grand Finale!!! Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the
    high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to
    boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they
    couldn't
    get their brand new 22 ft. boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every
    maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour
    of trying to make it go, they putted to a nearby marina, thinking someone
    there could tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed
    everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out drive
    went up and down, the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the
    marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up
    choking on water, he was laughing so hard.

    Now remember...This is true...

    Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer!

  2. #2
    Terinox's Avatar
    Terinox is offline The One & Only
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    HILARIOUS!!!

    GOOD ONE!

  3. #3
    Big Rush's Avatar
    Big Rush is offline The Juice Man
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    LOL

  4. #4
    rambo's Avatar
    rambo is offline The Lord God
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    # 2 slays me...

  5. #5
    EXCESS's Avatar
    EXCESS is offline Retired Moderator
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  6. #6
    Butch is offline Anabolic Member
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    Naw...the fuckin boat one is the best....I can not stop ....

  7. #7
    Shredz is offline Respected Member
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    this is some funny shit...man I am so glad there are people like this around...When ever you feel down you can read shit like this and all of a sudden you feel on top of the world.

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