Anabolics
Search More Than 6,000,000 Posts
Results 1 to 8 of 8
  1. #1
    Nathan's Avatar
    Nathan is offline Retired Moderator
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Posts
    2,441

    Don't quote me on this...

    ...but I'm relatively certain that the one and only Jesus H. Christ hisself invented the mirror. Yessum. Think about it. Those stories about him walking on water and turning water into wine. Sounds to me like someone was playing around with the magic of mirrors. I'll bet after he did those two "miracles" in front of the stupid peasants, he was all, "And by the way, I invented something called the mirror. You can see yourself in it." The peasants were too damn busy rejoicing though I imagine to really pay the mirror much attention. Sure, some of them took a long look at their genitals and other hard to see areas via the mirror but most were more preoccupied with the divine feats. Plus, peasants are known to be below average intelligence and thus really could not have been expected to put two and two together. Well, just think about it is all I'm asking.


    Note: This has nothing at all to do with genuine religious beliefs, it's just me spouting off jibberish that coincidentally happens to come together to form complete sentences.

  2. #2
    monstercojones's Avatar
    monstercojones is offline The Anabolic Assassin
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    AnabolicReview.com
    Posts
    3,181
    so jesus was an ancient david copperfield in your estimation?

    personally, i cant believe everything that is written in the new testament. just because he was the first whacko to claim the title "son of god" doesnt give him any more credibility in my eyes. the gospels were written by early christians, of course they contained miracles. Christianity just something i cant rationalize. I do like the idealogy though.

  3. #3
    BigGreen's Avatar
    BigGreen is offline Anabolic Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    12,000 feet above it all
    Posts
    4,453
    If we are to accept your assertion then we are forced to one of two corrolary conclusions as a result:

    1. Christ also invented the time machine, so that immediately after conceiving the mirror, he traveled back in time to bestow it upon the Egyptians many, many years before his birth.
    2. The Egyptians (as well as some other civilizations) having possessed this reflective glass before Christ's birth did not, in fact, possess the mirror, but only the collectively psychological, and hence cultural, manifestation of the mirror...in much the same way that "we" possess a cultural rendition/manifestation of the time machine but do not physicall possess, nor have we invented it.

    Clearly, both of these represent an exercise in the most impotent and facetious of logic. To address the latter conclusion, the Egyptians are widely regarded as history's notorious truth tellers - they did not philosophize on, nor produce artistic renditions of, things that simply were "not". Any reading of Egyptian mythology confirms this. With regards to the latter, I have JUST NOW disproved the possibility. How, you ask? Well, just now I decreed that it will be family tradition, and a deeply imbedded one at that, to instruct all progeny and posterity throughout the rest of my bloodline to come back in time to this exact moment the minute time machine travel is invented. No one has shown...and we can assume that if a prophet was able to devise time travel with mud, sticks, straw and donkeys, mankind will be able to replicate that feat at SOME point in the future. The only possible escape from this logical conclusion is that my bloodline dies out before this can be achieved...something absolutely absurd and bordering on the laughable given the heartiness of my ancestoral bloodline and my personal virility.

    Thus, I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Christ did not invent the mirror...he simply expanded upon its uses...much like Henry Ford did not invent the automobile, but is generally considered its "father".

  4. #4
    palme's Avatar
    palme is offline Rosie Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Sweden
    Posts
    6,649
    I have walked on ice (water) many times. Does this mean im as good as jesus, or even better since he only did it once...? Nathan?

  5. #5
    Farmer's Avatar
    Farmer is offline Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    In the field, hunting for poonany
    Posts
    889

    Re: Don't quote me on this...

    Originally posted by Nathan
    ...but I'm relatively certain that the one and only Jesus H. Christ hisself invented the mirror. Yessum. Think about it. Those stories about him walking on water and turning water into wine. Sounds to me like someone was playing around with the magic of mirrors. I'll bet after he did those two "miracles" in front of the stupid peasants, he was all, "And by the way, I invented something called the mirror. You can see yourself in it." The peasants were too damn busy rejoicing though I imagine to really pay the mirror much attention. Sure, some of them took a long look at their genitals and other hard to see areas via the mirror but most were more preoccupied with the divine feats. Plus, peasants are known to be below average intelligence and thus really could not have been expected to put two and two together. Well, just think about it is all I'm asking.


    Note: This has nothing at all to do with genuine religious beliefs, it's just me spouting off jibberish that coincidentally happens to come together to form complete sentences.
    ...Just quoted ya bud

    lol

  6. #6
    Cycleon is offline AR-Hall of Famer / Retired
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Wherever necessary
    Posts
    8,159
    Originally posted by BigGreen
    Clearly, both of these represent an exercise in the most impotent and facetious of logic.
    Certainly not a first from nathan The only benefit is that this "mind purge" was free from scatalogical reference

    monstercojones1 - first of all, that you cant rationalize it seems to be the point - the Bible notes that without faith it is impossible to please God - seems all He would have to do is show up as himself and everyone would grovel - but seems like he has more of a revers "Joe millionaire" drama in mind - we (the prospective date) have to like Him without the trappings of power and glory - it takes belief, and many people dont want to give up their own claim to godship to determine what is legit via their own eyes (if I cant see it, it doesnt exist).

    Moreover - have you ever thought that "miracles", indeed any "spiritual" phenomena has no precedence in evolution - ie. there is no reason for it in the "physical" world - it is not soething that would lead us to come up with without outside influence - why fear a ghost? fearing a lion is understandable, even if you dont know what it is - fearing a ghost is irrational but clearly somewhere in us understands that there is something beyond the physical

  7. #7
    FKITLETSGO's Avatar
    FKITLETSGO is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2002
    Location
    Baton Rouge
    Posts
    1,285
    Miracles and the unknown

    We are supposed to rely on faith as our main source of understanding paranormal and coincidental phenoms but I believe that there is proof and logical reasoning for us(the human species) not to understand.

    Stephen Hawkins once said that our current technological state can only scientifically define and understand 4 dimensions of which the universe is made of. He also pointed to the fact that the undefinable and questionable dimensions lies in the range of 10-20 and may go beyond into hundreds or thousand to infinite amounts. That means that the way we gauge and interpret everyday life is judged bye only 4 dimensions which is almost unrestricted but just imagine if we could understand and comprehend 20 other "new" dimensions. The universe as we know it would be changed and our perspective outlook on life would be totally different. A dimension may be as broad as time and smaller than 1/1,000,000,000,000 of a proton. Just to get an idea of how much we dont know think of a proton and imagine it being the size of a baseball. If this were the case then the nucleus of which the proton rotates around would be 400 yards away. Just to begin to think about this blows my mind and helps me to realize that there was mastery planning and intelligent creation behind everything we do. Ok well I ventured off into about 10 different topics and now im blabbling so im just gonna shut it now.peace

  8. #8
    Terinox's Avatar
    Terinox is offline The One & Only
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    5,013


    Good old Nathan, another amusing thread which makes sense

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •