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Thread: Should i buy a house? Alot of info

  1. #1
    Octaneforce's Avatar
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    Should i buy a house? Alot of info

    I tried posting this on quora and yahoo answers but theres a character limit and i cant seem to get the whole story into 1 post on those boards and its making it hard for me to explain to people whats going on. Its alot of info but i theres alot of wisdom on this forum so here goes.

    I live in a house with my father who we rent from a good friend of his. My parents got a messy divorce when i was a teenager and despite growing up fairly wealthy, they both pretty much lost everything and had to start over. Im 24 now and want to buy the rental house i live in. However its not that simple. About 2 years ago when we decided we wanted to buy this house, me and my father "expanded" my salary to qualify for a mortage (we have a construction company). Basically at the time my father said we would make it look like i make alot of money because his credit is so bad and then that way i could get the mortage to buy the house instead of him. Also we had to come up with "clean" money. He said he would claim less money to make up for my inflated salary and save alot of what i made. Fast forward to today and i have about 50k saved and the same salary, however our company has grown since then and he claims even more money than me now, regardless of the fact that i have been living off 30% of my salary to save up the money, granted he deals with all the bills. Also my sister moved into the house rent free during this time which added alot of nonsense to this whole ordeal. So very soon i am supposed to give up all this money i saved in my personal bank account to buy this house under a mortage in my name, BUT i still have to live with my family and my father wants to put his name on the deed. The house was appraised at about 40k more than we are getting it for so its not a bad financial decision, i just really would prefer to live alone. Should i take my money and run and buy a house somewhere else? It would for sure ruin the relationship with my family but i dont know how much longer i can live with them.
    I also feel like im worthy of the salary i make at our company, but my father thinks all the money i make is a gift from him. I work my ass off selling and running jobs and answer calls from physcotic customers at 10pm. My mother says he takes advantage of my abilities. I love my old man but im starting to beleive her. Sorry for the long post i dont know where else to turn!

  2. #2
    diesel101's Avatar
    diesel101 is offline Anabolic Member
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    The only thing I will say from experience is business and financial dealings with family and friends never turns out well.
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    Clove1234 is offline Associate Member
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    I second that
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    Bring up the point that you feel taken advantage of. Tell your father you want to come to terms and you want to negotiate the deal with him, or not make a deal at all.

    Doesn't sound like you're being taken advantage of. He's paying your bills and he gave you a higher salary. Though if you like the deal or not is up to you.

    My personal advice is don't get involved in deals that are difficult to back out of. Do you want to live with your family for a long time? I sure didn't I moved out as quickly as I could, I wanted at 18 but had to wait to 22 to get my own apartment in this city, and most would say I'm very lucky. I did it because I needed my own space and the silence so I could think and act on my own terms.

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    Quote Originally Posted by rnsplg View Post
    Bring up the point that you feel taken advantage of. Tell your father you want to come to terms and you want to negotiate the deal with him, or not make a deal at all.

    Doesn't sound like you're being taken advantage of. He's paying your bills and he gave you a higher salary. Though if you like the deal or not is up to you.

    My personal advice is don't get involved in deals that are difficult to back out of. Do you want to live with your family for a long time? I sure didn't I moved out as quickly as I could, I wanted at 18 but had to wait to 22 to get my own apartment in this city, and most would say I'm very lucky. I did it because I needed my own space and the silence so I could think and act on my own terms.
    Your probably right. I just feel like im picking ip the slack because my parents started their lives over. Most guys my age making my salary and still living at home live pretty crazy lives. New cars, always on vacation, guns and toys. Which is understandable. Might as well live it up while you can. I know my old man is trying to help me by "forcing" me to save money instead of buying dumb shit. But in a normal household i could go and guiltlessly buy a second house instead of having to buy the house im already in with my family. I dont know, i should be more humble because im a very fortunate guy but DAMN i just wanna be a baller and not have to stress over this.

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    Material things won't do much to make you happy unless you are good at lying to yourself lol. A vacation to Thailand would be nice, straight to the massage shops/bars/gogos, eating out, getting a massage, drinking an ice cold coconut... you get bored of this too though but it's good to relax and enjoy. Save up it's the rational thing to do. But I would seriously make the terms clear, what is the deal you are getting in to, and then use your mind and listen to what the other guys in here said, deals with family usually don't work out as you think they will...
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    Quote Originally Posted by rnsplg View Post
    Material things won't do much to make you happy unless you are good at lying to yourself lol. A vacation to Thailand would be nice, straight to the massage shops/bars/gogos, eating out, getting a massage, drinking an ice cold coconut... you get bored of this too though but it's good to relax and enjoy. Save up it's the rational thing to do. But I would seriously make the terms clear, what is the deal you are getting in to, and then use your mind and listen to what the other guys in here said, deals with family usually don't work out as you think they will...
    You are definitely wiser than me lol. I'll have to really analyze the deal. Financially its not so bad. If shit hits the fan i could just sell the house and probably still be on top. Best case scenario would be me buying this house, business continuing to boom, and then my father buying another house with my sister. And bam. I got my bachelor pad free and clear. Well, not free!

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    Might as well try and keep being wise then; assume the worst scenario for whatever decision you make
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    Quote Originally Posted by rnsplg View Post
    Might as well try and keep being wise then; assume the worst scenario for whatever decision you make
    Amen!!

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    I can say at your age the best thing to do is rent and save. Save as mush as you can. From owning a house you have no idea how much they really cost, both time and money, plus you lose a lot of freedom. Freedom to move due to any number of things. Change locations, states, cities, among other things.

    Credit does not mean much really. It is a trap. If you always pay for only what you can afford and pay yourself first, savings, the you will be so much further than most people. Cash always talks. Woth enough cash you never need credit and with enough money down credit again means shit.

    I got into a guy named David Ramsey over 10 years ago amd only have one Cc for online shopping only and it is paid off monthly. When I refinanced my house from a 30 to a 15 year note I had a death notice on my credit. Had to prove I was alive. If you have credit like that then no one can steal your identity.

    Just my thoughts and what I wish I would have done when I was in my 20's

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G935A using Tapatalk

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    Quote Originally Posted by David LoPan View Post
    I can say at your age the best thing to do is rent and save. Save as mush as you can. From owning a house you have no idea how much they really cost, both time and money, plus you lose a lot of freedom. Freedom to move due to any number of things. Change locations, states, cities, among other things.

    Credit does not mean much really. It is a trap. If you always pay for only what you can afford and pay yourself first, savings, the you will be so much further than most people. Cash always talks. Woth enough cash you never need credit and with enough money down credit again means shit.

    I got into a guy named David Ramsey over 10 years ago amd only have one Cc for online shopping only and it is paid off monthly. When I refinanced my house from a 30 to a 15 year note I had a death notice on my credit. Had to prove I was alive. If you have credit like that then no one can steal your identity.

    Just my thoughts and what I wish I would have done when I was in my 20's

    Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G935A using Tapatalk
    I feel like ive saved more than the average guy in his 20's. problem is everything is so god damn expensive in new york. I feel like I'll never get ahead and develop assets without a mortgage. But i agree, i refuse to borrow money for anything. I buy my cars outright and never use my credit cards. I just keep them going to keep my credit looking good. But like you said with enough cash up front you dont need credit anyway

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