Thread: Joke: Late Breaking News!
07-25-2003, 08:05 AM #1
Joke: Late Breaking News!
This, just in:
At Heathrow Airport today, an individual, later discovered to be a public school teacher, was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a compass, a protractor, and a graphical calculator.
Authorities believe he is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He is being charged with carrying weapons of math instruction.
07-25-2003, 08:28 AM #2
Wow that was pretty bad....but hey they make me laugh so here's some more bad jokes:
How do you catch a unique rabbit?
Unique up on it.
How do you catch a tame rabbit?
The tame way, unique up on it.
What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand?
And my all time favorite bad joke:
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
07-25-2003, 08:44 AM #3Originally Posted by Catamount
I know it was bad
07-25-2003, 09:44 AM #4
07-25-2003, 12:21 PM #5
Obviously MBH wasn't thrilled with the jokes. I'll make it up to you by telling an even better joke:
What type of coffee were they drinking on the Titanic?
Oh my god I am the funniest man alive!
07-25-2003, 12:25 PM #6Originally Posted by Catamount
That wasn't too bad
07-25-2003, 02:11 PM #7
those are the stupidest jokes i've seen, however i haven't laughed that hard in a long time.
07-25-2003, 02:25 PM #8
Why didn't the elephant eat the clown?
He thought he tasted funny.
What do you call 4 cows in a room masturbating?
07-25-2003, 02:26 PM #9
stupid jokes what in the bloody hell
best ones ive seen in forever best jokes are the simple ones you can laugh at right away
son: dad look at this rock its really cool
dad: yah thats a leverite
son: a leverwhat
dad: a leave er right where yah found er
07-25-2003, 03:07 PM #10
Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.
This made him what?
A super callused fragile mystic plagued with halitosis
07-25-2003, 03:09 PM #11
A man rushed into the doctor's office and shouted, "Doctor! I think I'm shrinking!"
The doctor calmly responded, "Now, settle down. You'll just have to be a little patient."
07-25-2003, 06:36 PM #12Originally Posted by FrkyBgStok
07-25-2003, 06:39 PM #13Originally Posted by Red Ketchup
Too bad I started this thread now all the bad jokes are coming out
07-25-2003, 10:43 PM #14Originally Posted by TheMudMan
Well, you made your bed bro...
07-25-2003, 11:16 PM #15
Hey did you guys know French Fries really were not imade in France?
They were made in greese.
07-25-2003, 11:16 PM #16
Alright I think this is how the joke goes...
A kung-fu dude and a mexican are getting into a bar fight and the karate dude says "I don't think you want to fight me, I know judo." The mexican dude says "Well I know MEXICAN judo, mang!" Chinese dude - "I've never heard of mexican judo, is there such a thing?" Mexican - Of course, mang! Judono if i got a gun, judono if i got a knife...."
07-26-2003, 07:46 AM #17Originally Posted by AandF6969
07-26-2003, 07:59 AM #18
What the hell are you guys talking about? Those jokes are fucken great!!! Laughed at all of them! Keep them coming!
07-26-2003, 08:09 AM #19Originally Posted by Terinox
07-26-2003, 08:32 AM #20
Man walks into a bar.......Ouch!
07-26-2003, 01:24 PM #21
Horse walks into a bar, bartender says: "Why the long face?"
FUCKEN CLASSIC!!! I LOVE THIS ONE!!!
07-26-2003, 02:35 PM #22Originally Posted by hercules88
See hercules88, a horse has a long face, but also, a long face is an expression used, may vary depending on the mood of the individual it is being said to.
07-27-2003, 07:47 AM #23Originally Posted by hercules88
Any time you want to go over and practice some ABC's and some 123's let me know
07-28-2003, 06:11 AM #24
What did the fish say when he ran into concrete?
07-28-2003, 07:33 AM #25New Member
- Join Date
- Dec 2002
Did you hear about the old lasy who got arrested off the airplane?
She was attempting to knit an afghan
07-29-2003, 08:47 PM #26
i'm gonna bump the crappy joke thread.
07-30-2003, 05:57 PM #27
Ooh my turn.
Guy walks in to a psychologist's office wrapped in Saran wrap and to this the shrink replies "Well, I can clearly see your nuts".
How do you recycle a condom?
Turn it inside out and shake the fu(k out of it.
07-31-2003, 07:19 AM #28
[/QUOTE]How do you recycle a condom?
Turn it inside out and shake the fu(k out of it.[/QUOTE]
HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That one was funny
07-31-2003, 10:17 AM #29New Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2003
What kind of bees produce milk?
07-31-2003, 11:42 AM #30
you all need to go home
07-31-2003, 12:09 PM #31
what do you call a bunch of lesbians in a closet?
a liquor cabinet
07-31-2003, 12:16 PM #32Originally Posted by FrkyBgStok
07-31-2003, 04:05 PM #33
All great, keep them cumming.
07-31-2003, 05:29 PM #34Originally Posted by TheMudMan
07-31-2003, 10:23 PM #35Originally Posted by Latin-muscle
07-31-2003, 10:26 PM #36
Where do you find a dog with no legs?
Right where you left him.
08-01-2003, 06:12 AM #37
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn't matter, he's not going to come to you anyways!
08-01-2003, 06:16 AM #38Originally Posted by Juggernaut2148
Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because they have big fingers.
08-01-2003, 06:17 AM #39
I don't know if this is a joke or just truth.
How are a texas tornado and a tennessee divorce the same?
Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.
08-01-2003, 07:28 AM #40
How do you know when you're REALLY ugly?
Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.
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