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  1. #1
    Kärnfysikern's Avatar
    Kärnfysikern is offline Retired: AR-Hall of Famer
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    fuck

    damn it just gest worse and worse. I dont know if i can take this much longer.

    I cant stand loneliness!!
    I have been fucking completely alone all my life. My parents never cared shit for me.

    It just goes to hell for me everytime....i have never even kissed anyone i my life.

    I just moved here to Linköping(1400 kilometers from where i used to live) and offcourse i find a girl imidietly that i start to care for alot!!
    I try to spend alot of time with her and everything and what happens. I get the fucking "I just want to be friends" line as usual. 5th time in a row.....5 different girls but they all said the same fucking thing...I just want to be your friend....fuck that.

    I just cant be alone anymore!!! I dont know what to do. I just cut myself(on the upper forearm. I dont dare to cut my wrists yet). I hate this! I hate my life!! I just fucking want to die. Im alwasy going to be alone no matter what I do il always be alone...it all seems so pointless.

  2. #2
    bigol'legs's Avatar
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    Wo settle down over there. A lot of my friends got the same problem but they will eventually meet a girl. Hey just remember theyll hinder you in the gym so just go to the gym and put the knife down...

  3. #3
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    Johan man, relax!

    Don't worry about being alone... I know the feeling.

    Almost all the women I've dated in the last 2 years just "wanted to be friends"... what that really means is they bitch and whine at ya, tell you all their problems and use you as their emotional tampon, but no fucking, no love. Screw that...

    Do what you need to get someone bro... christ if you need use internet dating do it!... no shame there and usually people who use those sites want a relationship.

    Just cut the crap about cutting yourself... it's stupid and all it will do is hurt people who care about you (even if you think nobody cares... someone always does and get deeply hurt... at the very least *I* care dammit). If you read the "get to know each other" thread you know I have been suicidal since I was young... I know a thing or two about how it feels.

    Bro, I ain't got any magic solutions for ya... (hey I am in my mid 30's, had more than a few failed relationships, have a 10yo boy and still am alone...) so all I can say is kick yourself hard in the ass, change the attitude and stop the self pity.

    You're not alone bro... you're not alone.

    Red

  4. #4
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    [QUOTE=johan]damn it just gest worse and worse. I dont know if i can take this much longer.

    I cant stand loneliness!!
    I have been fucking completely alone all my life. My parents never cared shit for me.
    =============================================



    Huh . . . sounds like a case of depression to me.

    Yes, life sucks sometimes, and sometimes it gets so bad that it sucks chancred penii.

    Sometimes there are things you can do about it, sometimes not.

    The "sometimes not" is usually when you get so down and depressed about life that you succeed in committing suicide. Funny thing about suicide, though, is that a day or two after you've sucessfully done it, your problems are over, but then, so are the good things life has to give ya.

    The "sometimes there are" is when somebody notices you're on death's doorstep and pulls you away, shows you how to get laid on a regular basis, how to be a friend with girls who want to be friends (and more than "just friends"), watches over you until you're back on your emotional feet.

    I've been there a time or two, and have a pretty good idea of how awful what you're going through can be. But hang in there, it'll pass; ask someone who "gives a rat's ass" for help, maybe someone on the AR board here, maybe someone close at home.

    One of the turning points in my life was when I was in a car wreck and I went through the windsheild. I was knocked out for a while, but a couple hours after I regained consciousness I was just fine . . . well, took a few days to fully recover from the head concussion, but I didn't have any broken bones or etc.
    I figured as bad as that accident was, I could have died . . . actually, I'm surprised I didn't. After narrowly escaping death, it occurred to me that I was living on "borrowed time," and that I may as well just enjoy the rest of my days on this planet, and fuck what anyone else may say.
    You mentioned something about cutting yourself on the forearm . . . well, considering that lots of people kill themselves this way (and you could have died today--ugh!) you too can consider Today as being "The First Day of the Rest of Your Life." It might sound a bit corny, but you could just tell the rest of the world to "fuck off" and tell your problems to "fuck off" and tell people who don't like you to go "fuck themselves" and then go find other people who enjoy your personality quirks and like you for the crazy person that you are. No, you don't have to put up with the vast majority of people on this planet who are so stupid it's a wonder the earth doesn't open up under them and swallow them up. All it really takes is finding a few diamonds among the rocks, or a few pearls among the oysters, One Good Woman among the bitches, and you'll be good to go.

    Don't know what I can do for you aside from giving you the benefit of my experience, but PM me if you can think of anything.
    I think I speak for all the bro's on AR in saying, as they do in the radish, onion, carrot, and potato industries, "We're rootin' for you . . ."
    Be like a shirt in your closet and hang in there . . . you've got what it takes to learn from this shit and make a better life for yourself.
    Best,
    --Tock

  5. #5
    bedrocked is offline Junior Member
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    I just cant be alone anymore!!!
    one thing i can tell you, if you can't live your life on your own, you're not ready to live it with someone. keep your head up, learn to love yourself first.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by bedrocked
    learn to love yourself first.
    Words of wisdom!!!

    Red

  7. #7
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    Johan, bro I’ve sat here at least 20 minutes trying to think of something to say and I damn sure wish it were more than this. Two bros just offered some good advice so please read back through those posts. Red has confessed he’s been depressive most of his life and must know something if here’s still here to offer his input and Tock, from the posts I’ve read of his he seems to have a pretty good angle on life and I consider above average intellect. As for my input on the matter…….first off I’d say you’re being a little rough on yourself right off the bat, you’re not even giving yourself a chance. You’re trying to HARD to make things happen, slow down and let them happen on there own. You need someone to talk to even if it’s a professional. Have you talked to your doctor? My brother has suffered depression all his life. So he got the advice of a good doctor and he is doing very well for himself in every aspect of life. Many talks with him I learned he was suffering some of the same things you described. I damn sure don’t want you to hurt yourself bro and I’ll bet every man and woman on this board feels the same way. PM me if I can offer any help at all.

    Jugg

  8. #8
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    go watch swingers, was a big inspiration for me.

  9. #9
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    Hey buddy. It's not so bad. I can give you some advice, having been in your situation before.

    One thing that girls can sense is desperation.
    You can't under any circumstances tell a girl how depressed you are, otherwise you'll automatically be put into the friend only category indefinitely. They can't afford to have a situation where they're at risk of getting hurt emotionally because you want to hurt yourself physically.

    Second.
    you've got to learn to appreciate the good things. and believe me, there are always good things. you've got a place to live, a new start, your health. these are things that many people would kill for. think of all the homeless. think of all those in 3rd world countries. You've got it better than probably 75% of the world, the only problem is that it's so hard to see it when you're down.

    third.
    Love comes along. Go out and meet some people. I would recommend going to a bar, meeting a girl, and just going for it. if you like her, kiss her. right there, in the bar. don't use too much tounge. It'll be like a huge weight off your chest. If she ends up not being the girl for you, so what. if she rejects you, so what? there's billions of girls in the world, and that one wasn't the one for you.

    Look forward to your better future.

  10. #10
    talon's Avatar
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    Man just cause the girls only want to be your friends, dosnt mean there isnt one out there that dosnt. Just think about it right now your getting practice with these girls. Use them to your advantage, ask them what they want in a man. Get this knowledge and boom use it for your maximum potential. Man life is to important to even worry about death. Enjoy this for its the only one ya got. Damn, bro after having a GF for two years and just breaking up w/her 5 weeks ago I felt like shit to. You gotta put your hardships under the table and move on. Good luck man, you will find the women thats right for you.

  11. #11
    Cycleon is offline AR-Hall of Famer / Retired
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    dude - one word, GET OUT OF SWEDEN! the world is a lot bigger place than somewhere that is dark 1/2 of the year and there are very few chicks and you are isolated - go travel through the EU with a bike or something - yes, youll be poor but think of the adventure - go to scotland or ireland, i guarantee you could have a face like a baboon;s backside and get a fine girl over there.

    Get out, see the world.

  12. #12
    Tock's Avatar
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    Oh yeah, as I mentioned in a previous post:
    There's no woman so beautiful, so sexy, and so glamorous that somewhere there isn't a man who's sick and tired of her.
    And here's something else to think about, a word from Confucious:
    "Wise man marry his second wife first."

    Hang in there, bro . . . we're rootin' for ya . . .
    --Tock

  13. #13
    BDTR's Avatar
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    CYCLEON offered you the best advice, it's a big fuggin' world out there. Don't give up yet, go out, travel, see the world. You'll find someone or something to make you happy. Shit you're young, you got a lot of time to be grumpy and miserable, have fun now.

  14. #14
    bermich's Avatar
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    Best advice is INTERNET DATING. Meet and get to know the girl before you actually meet and get to know her.
    Worked for me 6 years ago. Met some awesome chicks from there whom I would not have met in a regular situation. A few of them changed my life in the best ways and I still talk to and get advice from most of them.
    Try it. It might take away some of the loneliness.

  15. #15
    talon's Avatar
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    Just make sure it isnt a 300 pound male, boy toy on the other end, I mean DEMAND pictures...LOL

  16. #16
    BDTR's Avatar
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    Meeting girls online is LAME. It takes all the fun out of the game, seriously. It's like drugging a dear before you go in for the kill, 80% of the fun of dating is actually getting the date. Online dating is like a dumb video game. Just my 2 cents... I guess im old fashion, but i still prefer to use sleezy pick up lines and flash my dick at drunk girls.

  17. #17
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    I think you should see someone about your depression. This is not the first time you have posted about this problem and I think if you are hurting yourself or seriously contemplating suicide then a psychiatrist maybe able to help through medication or simple therapy. The truth is women don't find a needy person attractive and that is where you are right now. Learn to have fun and love yourself and you will be amazed out how many will be interested in you.

  18. #18
    clockworks's Avatar
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    whoa doode, hold the clomid...=) i have a friend who had never even HELD A GIRL'S HAND till he was 25 years old. all of a sudden at 25, he landed a really nice girl who fucked and sucked him forwards and backwards till he didn't know up from down. they recently moved in together and are doing great.

    doode, i feel your pain. i was totally alone (girlwise) till i was like 19. i dunno how to explain it, but for guys like me its total random chance to get a girl. it seems no matter how hard i try, i always get rejected to my face. every girl i have every laid or dated has approached me and basically "gone after" me. i always say "every girl i've ever been with has fallen into my lap". thats just the way it is for some people (i think you might be one of these people). no matter how hard we try, we'll fail. but when your time comes (and it will, trust me), a great girl is just gunna fall into your lap when you LEAST expect it.

    i dunno if that helps you at all, all i'm trying to say is, don't fret. you'll land a girl in due time when you're not even expecting it. till then, >try< not to worry about it so much. i say try cuz i >do< worry about it a lot also...=/

    -- clocky baby

    Quote Originally Posted by johan
    damn it just gest worse and worse. I dont know if i can take this much longer.

    I cant stand loneliness!!
    I have been fucking completely alone all my life. My parents never cared shit for me.

    It just goes to hell for me everytime....i have never even kissed anyone i my life.

    I just moved here to Linköping(1400 kilometers from where i used to live) and offcourse i find a girl imidietly that i start to care for alot!!
    I try to spend alot of time with her and everything and what happens. I get the fucking "I just want to be friends" line as usual. 5th time in a row.....5 different girls but they all said the same fucking thing...I just want to be your friend....fuck that.

    I just cant be alone anymore!!! I dont know what to do. I just cut myself(on the upper forearm. I dont dare to cut my wrists yet). I hate this! I hate my life!! I just fucking want to die. Im alwasy going to be alone no matter what I do il always be alone...it all seems so pointless.

  19. #19
    Tock's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by talon
    Just make sure it isnt a 300 pound male, boy toy on the other end, I mean DEMAND pictures...LOL
    ========================

    Man oh man, some people are so damn picky . . .
    --Tock

  20. #20
    Kärnfysikern's Avatar
    Kärnfysikern is offline Retired: AR-Hall of Famer
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    Thanks for all the advices.

    I kind of realised yesterday that I have to seek help and not just keep on thinking the problems will go away by themself.

    Seems like when Im decently happy its like balancin on a line or something, i just need one little push and I fall down into a depression again. Each one worse then the one before.
    Have to try and not get so drunk either when Im partying because its when Im realy drunk that I hurt myself.

    Now im going to do the one thing that truly makes me happy, hit the gym

  21. #21
    Juggernaut's Avatar
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    Good to hear Johan. Let us know how things are going for you. I hope you are able to find some relief from your depression. Best of luck.

  22. #22
    Tock's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by johan
    Thanks for all the advices.

    I kind of realised yesterday that I have to seek help and not just keep on thinking the problems will go away by themself.

    Seems like when Im decently happy its like balancin on a line or something, i just need one little push and I fall down into a depression again. Each one worse then the one before.
    Have to try and not get so drunk either when Im partying because its when Im realy drunk that I hurt myself.

    Now im going to do the one thing that truly makes me happy, hit the gym
    ======================================


    Oh yeah, the first thing you want to do to conquer depression is to give up the alcohol. It's a drug that acts as a depressant, making things worse for you.

    There's a chance that you've got some sort of chemical imbalance in your brain that's making you feel bad. It's pretty common, and I'd say that probably half of everyone has the problem . . . some just a little bit, others quite a bit. Your doctor can prescribe one of several pills that'll fix things right up.
    A friend of mine called my up a few years ago, she was in tears because her girlfriend broke up with her. She had the business end of a shotgun in her mouth and asked me how she could pull the trigger.
    Oh yah . . .
    I talked her through the immediate crisis, and made sure she went to see her doctor. The first medication made her feel too sedated all the time, so the doc prescribed her something else, and that didn't work too well either, so they tried a third type, and it worked great. That, plus thyroid hormones, and some counseling, evened her out, so now she's no more obnoxious than any other woman.
    The moral of this story is, that some people feel miserable all their lives because they need a bit more of some brain chemical, and there's no good reason for you not to check and see if you're one of these people. So, go do it.
    Oh yeah, another thing -- I checked into various techniques of committing suicide (something I had to promise my lady friend as a condition of her not killing herself), and a gun to the mouth is one of the most painful ways to go . . . seems that usually, the gunshot pokes a hold through the throat, and all it does is let you bleed for an hour or so in great pain before you finally pass out and die. So don't do this.
    Anyway, go get some help, you deserve it, and go on to become a Mr Olympia, move to America, and become a governor of one of our 50 states (move to Texas and I promise to vote for you) . . .
    Best,
    --Tock

  23. #23
    bermich's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bdtr
    Meeting girls online is LAME. It takes all the fun out of the game, seriously. It's like drugging a dear before you go in for the kill, 80% of the fun of dating is actually getting the date. Online dating is like a dumb video game. Just my 2 cents... I guess im old fashion, but i still prefer to use sleezy pick up lines and flash my dick at drunk girls.
    GOD DAMN CLAPPY. My advice wasnt for you. It was for someone who doesnt go out much or doesnt have much luck with the pick up lines on the ladies.
    Come on now. If I was to give you advice on how to pick up the ladies I would type something like "CLUB EM OVER THE HEAD, DRAG EM TO YOUR CAVE AND FUCK EM" But no. The advice was not for you now was it?
    For someone who is shy or doesnt have much experience on picking up ladies, you have to admit, the internet seems like a good plan. IMO
    BTW. I met and fucked some HOT ASS girls awhile back when PRODIGY was around. (think it still is but) IT WAS TOO EASY like you said.

  24. #24
    bermich's Avatar
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    Zoloft and welbutrin work well.

  25. #25
    palme's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CYCLEON
    dude - one word, GET OUT OF SWEDEN! the world is a lot bigger place than somewhere that is dark 1/2 of the year and there are very few chicks and you are isolated - go travel through the EU with a bike or something - yes, youll be poor but think of the adventure - go to scotland or ireland, i guarantee you could have a face like a baboon;s backside and get a fine girl over there.

    Get out, see the world.
    We have plenty of girls here...stop being hateful towards my country

  26. #26
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    Ya I thought there was hella lot of hot chicks in Sweden.

  27. #27
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    Well I'll make my points short, as it seems everyones covered everything.

    You mentioned you drink a lot... nice little chemical to help you NOT concentrate on how "shitty" life is.

    You mentioned numerous times having depression, which is obviously severe, see a doctor, might turn out that you just need someone to talk to and let all that shit out... you will be surprised at the things that come out when you are talking to one, you might not even pinpoint your problem until that day.

    As corny as it may sound I am a firm believer that everyone in this world was put here for a reason. Even if you don't think so by killing yourself you will be hurting a lot of people, TRUST ME. Don't think you are unimportant, YOU gotta make that difference on your own, theres only one of you , but a hell of a lot of world. I believe that everyone was put here to accomplish SOMETHING, when that something comes you will know it. You are alive for a little bit, but death is forever. Make of that what you will.

    Another point. 1 of you billions of people, gotta find one right, HELL YEAH! Travel. Doesn't have to be immediately, save money, make that your goal, experience more, theres a lot to learn and learning things will SURELY change the way you view everything now.

    Sure life can be harsh, at times you can hate it. We only have one however, WE have to make the best of it, no one else will, they are too busy trying to make the best of theirs.

    Now think about someone you care, imagine they felt unimportant and were depressed and they killed themselves. Imagine what that would do to you... please don't do that.

    I hope I helped some. Take care. Remember theres only one of you...

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