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  1. #1
    Nathan's Avatar
    Nathan is offline Retired Moderator
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    I want to be a vampire

    The whole thing sounds dark and mysterious to me, and I think we all know that that **** is appealing. Plus, I think I'd be able to pull off wearing a cape a whole lot easier. It would just be more all around socially acceptable. Moreover, no one in there right ****ing mind would turn down a kick ass pair of fangs. Sharp things are so much better than not so much sharp things. Furthermore, I'd be paler than I already am, which, while not technically possible, would certainly be a sight to see. Clitoris.

  2. #2
    rambo's Avatar
    rambo is offline The Lord God
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    I want to be a wombat.

    Yes, because being a wombat would be much more my style. Vampires are just so gay. I mean seriously, who likes biting things that much. Hell, my cape would even be built in, and that beats the hell out of my Precious Moments bedsheet. To tell the truth I only want to be a wombat because it's easier than being a snorkel, and even easier than being a spatula. All these words make me want to roll around in Crisco and then masturbate in a preschool. Sphincter.

  3. #3
    Nathan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    Yes, because being a wombat would be much more my style. Vampires are just so gay. I mean seriously, who likes biting things that much. Hell, my cape would even be built in, and that beats the hell out of my Precious Moments bedsheet. To tell the truth I only want to be a wombat because it's easier than being a snorkel, and even easier than being a spatula. All these words make me want to roll around in Crisco and then masturbate in a preschool. Sphincter.
    HappyScrappy? Supersizeme?

  4. #4
    rambo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nathan
    HappyScrappy? Supersizeme?
    Neither.

  5. #5
    LORDBLiTZ Guest
    Where would you bite CYC with them fangs?

  6. #6
    jeffylyte's Avatar
    jeffylyte is offline Member
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    God I miss this! Scnookums!

  7. #7
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    Yeah, that would be pretty tight...I'd go around biting all the pretty girls necks.

  8. #8
    palme's Avatar
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    Me 2! Vampires are very sexual.

  9. #9
    abstrack's Avatar
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    I agree, to be able to live for centuries and fly through the air. I would very much like to be a vamp.
    abstrack@protonmail.com

  10. #10
    hoss827's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by abstrack
    I agree, to be able to live for centuries and fly through the air. I would very much like to be a vamp.
    I thought Vampires could live forever though, until they saw sunlight...

  11. #11
    sigrabbit's Avatar
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    You could start practicing by sucking on a dirty tampon. Oh wait, Nathan already does that for fun.

  12. #12
    Juggernaut's Avatar
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    Now you're talking. I've often thought of what it would be like to be a vampire..........that or maybe a werewolf. Werewolf might be as cool though.....you can't pick up chicks in werewolf mode but **** don't all the Vampires get the hotties! But I don't know if I could kill innocent people just so I could survive. I could probably live off indegents and criminals.........and anyone that really pisses me off but i don't think I could eat the average population.

    And no cape. Well, maybe one that looks like a nice silk sports jacket that with a streach of the arms becomes a cape...........that would be sweet. Tant.

  13. #13
    Devourer's Avatar
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    the sun will come out tomorrow tomorrow

  14. #14
    TheMudMan's Avatar
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    This is the first post Nathan made that makes any sence to me

    Vampires are cool....... you live forever, stay young, have special poweres, and like you said you can wear a cape...... what isn't there to like

  15. #15
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    Hell everyone wants special powers but I surely don't want to live forever. I would rather be a daywalker like Blade.

  16. #16
    LuvMuhRoids's Avatar
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    Nathan you been watching to many Buffy reruns.

  17. #17
    palme's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Juggernaut2148
    Now you're talking. I've often thought of what it would be like to be a vampire..........that or maybe a werewolf. Werewolf might be as cool though.....you can't pick up chicks in werewolf mode but **** don't all the Vampires get the hotties! But I don't know if I could kill innocent people just so I could survive. I could probably live off indegents and criminals.........and anyone that really pisses me off but i don't think I could eat the average population.

    And no cape. Well, maybe one that looks like a nice silk sports jacket that with a streach of the arms becomes a cape...........that would be sweet. Tant.

    Vampires dont kill b/c itīs fun they do it to survive, kinda like lions kills zebras, you wouldnt think about it as innocent poeple, you think prey.

    If anyone here on AR is a vampire come look me up! Open invitation!

  18. #18
    groverman1's Avatar
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    Yeah if you drank palme's blood you wouldnt need any gear then again as a vamp you shouldnt need gear anyway.

  19. #19
    palme's Avatar
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    Hahaha! True bro

  20. #20
    BUYLONGTERM's Avatar
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    Hmmm, was that you outside my window last night looking to suck the Testosterone from my blood? One of you sick bastards were there...

    Someone confess...

  21. #21
    groverman1's Avatar
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    It was I and **** tasted like vet gear.

  22. #22
    bigol'legs's Avatar
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    Well...

    theres no way you could be a vampire bodybuilder... cause of the strength issue... couldnt work out in the gym... because the stink of Jugg's garlic smell would drive you off..


  23. #23
    groverman1's Avatar
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    That's true and if you wanted to kill one on gear you could put holy water into one of his vials.

  24. #24
    Juggernaut's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bigol'legs
    Well...

    theres no way you could be a vampire bodybuilder... cause of the strength issue... couldnt work out in the gym... because the stink of Jugg's garlic smell would drive you off..

    Hey! It's my liver spots that cause that smell.

  25. #25
    Nathan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    Neither.
    But you know who they are?

  26. #26
    rambo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nathan
    But you know who they are?
    I know of them.

  27. #27
    LORDBLiTZ Guest
    Nathan's wet to bite stuff.

  28. #28
    Nathan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    I know of them.
    Who are you on Elite? Did you know me as well? I'm gonna crack this case.

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