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  1. #1
    bermich's Avatar
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    What type of family are you from

    Type of family in meaning of: If you got suspended in school for fighting, would you get grounded for awhile based on the fact that you got suspended, were fighting, both, or wouldnt get grounded at all.
    I was explaining in another thread that I was brought up being told to earn and keep your respect. If someone tries to bully you or take advantage of you, you need to confront the person and do what it takes to make it stop.

    I know several friends whos family does not allow fighting under any circumstances. Everything can be worked out civily or you need to talk to the principal or teacher about the situation. If those friends came home suspended, especially for fighting, they would get grounded for months.

    I am glad I was raised with that sort of understanding where I had the decision of determining for myself when physical conflict was necassary and not an adult to rectify the problem.
    In school, if you told on someone, it usually escilated the problem even worse. You will not always have the protection of an adult.


    Sure suspension was not good but if you earned respect of the onlookers and better yet, the person whos ass you just kicked, then the suspension was well worth it in the eyes of my family.

    Were you allowed to fight or were you taught that violence just causes more problems???

  2. #2
    TheMudMan's Avatar
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    My family is extreamly disfunctional........... So being suspended for fighting never phased my parents. My father who didn't teach us much at least tought us to never let anyone take advantage of us. He also tought us to go into every situation thinking the worse so that you are never cought off guard.

  3. #3
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    My family would back me up if i had a good reason to fight...self defense or someone really pushing me...im very laid back so they know it'd take a hellof lot for me to throw hands.....

  4. #4
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    My mom is very old fashion, she belives everything could and should be solved by talking and that only stupid people take to their fists and that you should always turn to the police if your a victim of violence or theafth etc.

    Personally i try and talk but belive that sometimes you hafto teach people that they cant take liberties with you.

  5. #5
    KrashRoute's Avatar
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    My rents were pretty apathetic when I was growin up.. long as the cops didnt show up.

  6. #6
    bermich's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KrashRoute
    My rents were pretty apathetic when I was growin up.. long as the cops didnt show up.

    K-RASH. Is that your cat in your avy? He looks pretty wicked. Doesnt seem like he plays well with others. Is he juicin?

  7. #7
    Testify's Avatar
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    I never did get into fights. I have always been pretty mellow like that. I guess I take after my Dad . . . or maybe I just smoked too much pot in HS and college . . .

    If I had been in trouble for fighting, I would have also been punished at home. I remember getting grounded on top of suspensions (but not detention level stuff) for other non-violent stuff.

  8. #8
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    [QUOTE=palme]My mom is very old fashion, she belives everything could and should be solved by talking and that only stupid people take to their fists and that you should always turn to the police if your a victim of violence or theafth etc.

    Personally i try and talk but belive that sometimes you hafto teach people that they cant take liberties with you.[/QUOTE/]

    MY MOM IS LIKE THIS ALSO. MY DAD ON THE OTHER HAND WAS ARMY SPECIAL FORCES IN VIETNAM, SO IT IS A LITTLE BIT OF A CONTRAST. GROWING UP I WAS TAUGHT TO DEFEND MYSELF BY MY DAD, BUT I HAVE NOT BEEN IN A FIGHT IN A WHILE MAYBE IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH BEING 6'8" 335LBS

  9. #9
    bermich's Avatar
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    Six eight at 335 lbs? That is extremely massive. Ive never backed down from huge guys but your stats are way scarey. I would be scared if I pissed you off.
    Were you a linebacker for the raiders or something? What is your body fat?

  10. #10
    allsaucedup's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bermich
    Six eight at 335 lbs? That is extremely massive. Ive never backed down from huge guys but your stats are way scarey. I would be scared if I pissed you off.
    Were you a linebacker for the raiders or something? What is your body fat?
    body fat is kind of high right now just finished bulking im about 19-20% believe it or not i actally played high school and college basketball. got into lifting after that ended because of knee problems

  11. #11
    Tock's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bermich
    Were you allowed to fight or were you taught that violence just causes more problems???
    st ignore him and he'll go away." I took it for as long as I could, then one day whupped the living daylights out of him then threw him into the basketball pole. No one messed with me after that . . .
    But it took years to get back my natural aggression and to figure out I had a right ot defend myself after that, thanks to a dysfunctiona family.
    Geez, y'all think my job killing dogs was awful, I could tell ya some stories about my family.
    --Tock

  12. #12
    daman1's Avatar
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    I was taught to ignore them until they came at you. Once they come at you, beat the hell out of them.

  13. #13
    NissanRider240 is offline Junior Member
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    My family has been said to be like the Brady bunch. My parents always expected me to be a good kid and never get in trouble. Defanately no fighting. Just hope they dont find out about the extra "supplements" im taking. Their perception of my perfection would be tainted.

  14. #14
    LilVito469's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bigsd67
    My family would back me up if i had a good reason to fight...self defense or someone really pushing me...im very laid back so they know it'd take a hellof lot for me to throw hands.....
    mine are the same way, they know if i got into a fight i didn't start it im not the type to go out looking for trouble it just finds me sometimes and they understand that.

  15. #15
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    At 15 I basically started doing whatever I pleased. Drank every day, smoked pot, etc. My parents are good people but very uninvolved. I will be much more dilligent with my kids.

  16. #16
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    my family is pretty badly ****ed up... so i'd have to say that when i got suspended for fighting, which has happened numerous times, and im not proud of it... i was usually commended by my dad because in any situation where i resprted to violence it was wholly justified and well thought-out.

  17. #17
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    My parents, they don't care as long as i'm the one being attacked first. As long as I dont innitiate the fight, it's all good. But if someone pushes me, then the shi ts on, and i wont be grounded.

  18. #18
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    The two questions my dad always asked after I got in a fight was 1.) Did you start it? If I said yes...smack across the face and 2.) Did you win? If I said yes...He usually congratulated me for sticking up for myself.

  19. #19
    Devourer's Avatar
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    i was never encouraged to fight. when i was young my parents tried to ground me. they learned it didnt work. i would be grounded but id just walk away. so they would take things away from me. that didnt work either.

  20. #20
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    yeah my parents are cool they just aren't crazy about me smoking weed, but it's all good they are cool as long as im not dealing drugs out of there house and they dont see it laying around.

  21. #21
    BOUNCER is offline Retired Vet
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    Thankfully my son keeps most of his fighting to the ring and mats. Although he's had to kick some ass a few times on the street, after all he has a little sis to take care off!. His martial arts keeps him very well disciplined so when he tells me he's been fighting on the street I've never questioned his motives, and hope I never have to. I had a fight last summer with a Romania refugee scumbag on the street, my son threw in a few sly one's too, made me very proud!. He's 11 and just won another kickboxing title in Northern Ireland last Sunday.
    My daughter is 8, she doesn't do martial arts yet, she pretty wild and I love her for it. i'll never try to extinguish that fire in the kids. I

  22. #22
    cb25's Avatar
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    My family was the super-soft "fighting doesn't solve anything" kind. For that reason, i was never in a fight growing up...i would've been punished for both fighting and being suspended.

    At the same time, i'm extremely mellow and nothing really gets to me. The only times I've had to step up because someone was crossing lines...they've backed down.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by cb25
    My family was the super-soft "fighting doesn't solve anything" kind. For that reason, i was never in a fight growing up...i would've been punished for both fighting and being suspended.

    At the same time, i'm extremely mellow and nothing really gets to me. The only times I've had to step up because someone was crossing lines...they've backed down.
    man you say you have to step up and they back down, you must not have been in boston at the time lol... from my experiences no one in their right mind where i grew up backed down for anything.

  24. #24
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    my parents were divorced when i was in 3rd grade or so, my dad's a acholic. about fighting though, my father always taught me let them swing first, after that i dont care what you do to the kid, just dont come home if you loose. so i always just stuck by that, but now its gotten more to the point of where they have to touch me first, like a push or some **** like that.
    i turned it into my box rule. talk all the sh-t you want, but step into my box and its on, and you wont like the outcome at the end

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by cb25
    My family was the super-soft "fighting doesn't solve anything" kind. For that reason, i was never in a fight growing up...i would've been punished for both fighting and being suspended.

    At the same time, i'm extremely mellow and nothing really gets to me. The only times I've had to step up because someone was crossing lines...they've backed down.
    yeah thats basically my family as well. They dont see any reason for fighting and hate that I'm a bouncer and a sambo fighter. I on the other hand love the violence but will never encourage my kid to use violence. There is someone always bigger badder and tougher than you are and I dont want to see my future kid finding that out the hard way. Maybe when he's a kid he'll get the message through the school yard but when he gets older I'd rather not have him fight.

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by USfighterFC
    yeah thats basically my family as well. They dont see any reason for fighting and hate that I'm a bouncer and a sambo fighter. I on the other hand love the violence but will never encourage my kid to use violence. There is someone always bigger badder and tougher than you are and I dont want to see my future kid finding that out the hard way. Maybe when he's a kid he'll get the message through the school yard but when he gets older I'd rather not have him fight.
    If you don't mind telling me bro, where do you bounce. If you want PM me with your reponse.

  27. #27
    Warrior's Avatar
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    In High School I got 5 days of out of school suspension (OSS) for gettin' into a heated arguement with a teacher (I heard she cried after I walked out of the class). My dear ol' Dad called the school and arranged for the "lesser punishment" - 5 days of IN SCHOOL suspension (ISS). Man... 5 days in a row of 7 hours of detention SUCKED!

  28. #28
    Elliot's Avatar
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    I was bought up in a family that would back me up on almost anything, however if was suspended from school i would get my ass beat/screamed at when i was younger but as time progressed they stoped caring since i was my own person and im responsible for my own actions.

  29. #29
    Warrior's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KrashRoute
    My rents were pretty apathetic when I was growin up.. long as the cops didnt show up.
    That was my father too... as long as I told him everything and he never got any surprises from the cops. I remember one day coming home with 3 squads pulling up 15 minutes behind me - BOY WAS HE PISSED! He came in my room and said, "you got about 2 minutes to explain why the police are here..."
    Last edited by Warrior; 02-13-2004 at 12:06 AM.

  30. #30
    bermich's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Warrior
    That was my father too... as long as I told him everything and he never got any surprises from the cops. I remember one day coming home with 3 squads pulling up 15 minutes behind me - BOY WAS HE PISSED! He came in my room and said, "you got about 2 minutes to explain why the police are here..."

    Well....Why were they there? Whos boyfriend did you beat up?

  31. #31
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    never got in fights in school kids were to afraid to fight me because i was the biggest kid in school that doesn't mean i didn't get in my fair share out of school sticking up for my little sh#t talking friends

  32. #32
    Warrior's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bermich
    Well....Why were they there? Whos boyfriend did you beat up?
    I was expressing my artictic tallents at a local playground with a buddy and a few cans of spray paint... someone called in my plates on my car when we left - I was around 16 or 17 then... we actually did some pretty cool stuff their... I thought the playground had a better "feel" to it... ya know?


  33. #33
    KrashRoute's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bermich
    K-RASH. Is that your cat in your avy? He looks pretty wicked. Doesnt seem like he plays well with others. Is he juicin?

    Not at all shes on a strict diet of drol, halo, jameson and socks. \\m//

    na actually snagged it off somethingawful.com

  34. #34
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    The rule in the house was no fighting...but when it happened:

    1. Punishment for fighting.

    2. Punishment for losing the fight (if applicable)

    Then life went on...no big deal.

    peace,

    ttgb

  35. #35
    cb25's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LilVito469
    man you say you have to step up and they back down, you must not have been in boston at the time lol... from my experiences no one in their right mind where i grew up backed down for anything.
    hell no...grew up in AZ...and it's always been someone i knew...not random people

  36. #36
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    I could always do anything I wanted. My parents never had any control of me whatsoever. But we lived out in a village where I couldnt realy do anything bad and when we moved into a town I was a total nerd and just never got into troubble.

  37. #37
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    My father wasn't around much, when i was growing up.. My mother is the strongest woman i know, she raised me, but she was so consumed with work and bills, alot I learned from trial and error.. As far as fighting, there is a time and a place for everything.. Through school, i had the rep as a tough kid, not a bully, but i was respected, because i respected everyone no matter who you were.. I was never suspended outside of school.. I didn't concern myself with bozos during school hours, after school was a different story, I was there to learn.. I never wanted to put my mother through any extra bullsh!t that she didn't need.. I never had a curfew.. If i fought, she never found out, period.. It was my decision, and I would never put burden like that on anyone.. It's my responsibility, and no one elses, thats how i thought, and still look at things now.. When i was 17 the last time i spoke to my father before he died, he gave me the whole women, jailtime, education is important speech.. If you go to jail, don't call your mother or me for bail, sit there and learn from your mistake.. Don't get a girl pregnant unless you can take care of the three of you, and never stop learning, education is your most important asset.. That was the last time i spoke to him, 1 month later he passed away unexpectedly..

  38. #38
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    I was actually brought up by the ideal family.

    Mom stayed at home until my sister and I entered HS
    Dad made a shïtload of money and spoled us rotten
    I was a model kid until HS (then I turned sour)

    When it came to fighting, I was not allowed to start anything, but if the other person swung or even grabbed first, then I was expected to go all out and win the fight. My dad always said "the only good fight is the one you win so do what it takes to win it"

    What that means is that I got in trouble for starting ****, but there were no questions asked when I got suspended for braining this 260lbs moron with the teachers ceramic planter after he pushed me to the ground and tried to pin me down.

    As for my kid, the same "rules" apply. Don't start **** and walk away from everything you can, but if you need to defend yourself... go all out. On the other hand in kids sports I have zero tolerance for fighting... he plays hockey and I do not allow any fighting... it does the team no good to have him benched in the box 2-5 minutes. Same in soccer, being red carded out of the game for scrapping with another kid doesn't help the team at all.

    Red

  39. #39
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    My father wasn't around much, when i was growing up.. My mother is the strongest woman i know, she raised me, but she was so consumed with work and bills, alot I learned from trial and error.. As far as fighting, there is a time and a place for everything.. Through school, i had the rep as a tough kid, not a bully, but i was respected, because i respected everyone no matter who you were.. I was never suspended outside of school.. I didn't concern myself with bozos during school hours, after school was a different story, I was there to learn.. I never wanted to put my mother through any extra bullsh!t that she didn't need.. I never had a curfew.. If i fought, she never found out, period.. It was my decision, and I would never put burden like that on anyone.. It's my responsibility, and no one elses, thats how i thought, and still look at things now.. When i was 17 the last time i spoke to my father before he died, he gave me the whole women, jailtime, education is important speech.. If you go to jail, don't call your mother or me for bail, sit there and learn from your mistake.. Don't get a girl pregnant unless you can take care of the three of you, and never stop learning, education is your most important asset.. That was the last time i spoke to him, 1 month later he passed away unexpectedly..
    sounds alot like my life.. except i never had a dad around, my mom would work 3 jobs at a time to pay the bills, and my bro always taught me to do everything i can to help my mom out. we both started working at age 12 and by 16, we were helping w/ bills and we even bought our own cars, we were both more mature than anyone our age. my mom knew that we were responsible so she never had to set any rules or punish us, because we never did anything wrong....or too wrong anyway. as far as fighting, my bro was always getting in fights, but he never provoked one of them.....ever, and my mom knew that so she didnt care much, she was only worried about us getting hurt. but all nall i was brought up in a laid back family (not much of a family: brother, mom and me)

  40. #40
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    Ok, well i am still with the fam. I was with my father growing up (divorced), he grew up on the streets since the time he was 13. Was in prison by the time he was 23, for 7 years. Getting in fights was not a big deal to him. It was ''As long as you wone'' So basicley i was growing up trying to be in my fathers shoes, trying to be the ''bad ass''. Well that got real old after a few years. After being arrested, charged, and all the other fun stuff thats about the time it got tiring. I guess after you spend the first 15 years of yor life trying to be a bad ass it sticks, even when you are just acting normal. I am always asked why i dont smile, why i dont laugh, and why i always look angry. Even though now i dont try and look a certan way, it just happens. I now live with my mother, looking to go to college and be sumthin. But i wouldent say my mother is the perfect parental figure, so i guess thats why i still feel like its me againts the word.

    Bri

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