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  1. #1
    SV-1's Avatar
    SV-1 is offline Respected Member
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    Diary entries of your household pets.

    After reading the thoughts of your household pets thread I thought I'd post this.




    EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DAILY DIARY:

    8:00 a.m. Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

    9:30 a.m. Oh, boy! A car ride! My favorite!

    9:40 a.m. Oh, boy! A walk! My favorite!

    10:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Getting rubbed and petted! My favorite!

    11:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

    Noon - Oh, boy! The kids! My favorite!

    1:00 p.m.Oh, boy! The yard! My favorite!

    4:00 p.m.Oh, boy! To the park! My favorite!

    5:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Dog food! My favorite!

    5:30 p.m.Oh, boy! Pretty Mums! My favorite!

    6:00 p.m.Oh, boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

    6:30 a.m.Oh, boy! Watching TV with my master! My favorite!

    8:30 p.m Oh, boy! Sleeping in master's bed! My favorite!



    EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DAILY DIARY:

    Day 183 of My Captivity: My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded; I must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair, must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, this is not working according to plan. There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was due to my power of allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives here are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant, he speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current lacement in the high metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time ......

  2. #2
    Rugby13's Avatar
    Rugby13 is offline Member
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    ....funny

  3. #3
    ttuPrincess Guest
    Stop.. your giving my cat ideas..

    Lol that was funny!!

  4. #4
    decadbal's Avatar
    decadbal is offline Banned
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    goldfish, u have to get a goldfish one....funny stuff bigtime

  5. #5
    Testify's Avatar
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    LMAO!

    Those are awesome . . . I have to show this to the wife.

  6. #6
    Kärnfysikern's Avatar
    Kärnfysikern is offline Retired: AR-Hall of Famer
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    lmao **** cats

  7. #7
    Terinox's Avatar
    Terinox is offline The One & Only
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    Quite funny indeed!!

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