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  1. 03-31-2004, 04:15 AM #1
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    My Testicles: The Greatest Gift of All

    Honestly, I mean what the ****. I mean I'm banging away at the keyboard like a cracked out monkey. Maybe I shouldn't have cracked out and rolled around in fur, but I'm not getting any younger. Kind of like when you really have to grab your crotch, and people are watching, but you do it anyway, and as blatantly as possible. I mean there have been times when I've sat in a waiting room and readjusted myself for what must have been 45 minutes. People stare, yeah. But is it any worse than the fact that I wear nothing but a "SUCKHOI" t-shirt and sweatpants with the ass cut out?

    My balls are hot. I mean they are beyond toasty. Like burning stars, giving off a luminance that rivals the sun of our own solar system. Often times when I grapple them, no matter how gently, I singe the hair on my palms. Too many young women have been sent to the hospital by the heat of my testicles. I almost feel bad. But I do not; they venture into uncharted territory, much like legendary Captain Jean-Luc Picard, of the Starship Enterprise. The risks they take are their own.

    I once had a swollen testicle at the age of six. It was quite amazing, to say the least. I had been fondling myself, as I usually did, and looked down while making a "poo-poo" to see what had to be a large softball implanted in my left testicle. The doctors had never seen anything like it, and several dropped to their knees, in repentance, praising the Eucharist and Hailing Mary. I have been enchanted with this deeply rooted heat ever since. I have the ability to warm a room like no other machine. When we camp, we often sit around my shaven testicles, roasting marshmallows and ironically, wieners. I am blessed like no other man.
    Last edited by rambo; 03-31-2004 at 04:37 AM.
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  2. 03-31-2004, 06:19 AM #2
    KeyMastur
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    ok nathan wanna be
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  3. 03-31-2004, 07:44 AM #3
    stack-a-licious
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    LOL...!!!
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  4. 03-31-2004, 10:06 AM #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by KeyMastur
    ok nathan wanna be
    bwhahaha
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  5. 03-31-2004, 10:10 AM #5
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    Your Testicals? I beg to differ....MINE are the greatest gift! And I give them to the opposit sex as often as possible...here of late it hasn't been possible and it **** sure hasn't been often.
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  6. 03-31-2004, 01:22 PM #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by KeyMastur
    ok nathan wanna be
    Hey, **** you old man. Nice contribution to a thread I took time to write. Next time you have a really constructive comment make sure you write it down nice and neat, put it in a coke bottle, and shove it the **** up your ass.
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  7. 03-31-2004, 01:31 PM #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    Hey, **** you old man. Nice contribution to a thread I took time to write. Next time you have a really constructive comment make sure you write it down nice and neat, put it in a coke bottle, and shove it the **** up your ass.
    nice comeback


    Rambo>Keymastur
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  8. 03-31-2004, 01:39 PM #8
    BOUNCER
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    My balls are hot.
    Didn't think you had any
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  9. 03-31-2004, 01:42 PM #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    Hey, **** you old man. Nice contribution to a thread I took time to write. Next time you have a really constructive comment make sure you write it down nice and neat, put it in a coke bottle, and shove it the **** up your ass.
    Is lube allowed or is that totally out of the question.....from a comfort standpoint of course.
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  10. 03-31-2004, 02:27 PM #10
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    rambo revealed!!!!
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails My Testicles: The Greatest Gift of All-untitled2.jpg  
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  11. 03-31-2004, 02:30 PM #11
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    **** DB...............looks like Rambo needs to do squats....lots and lots of squats. In the gym! I'd hate to know what he would be doing had I not stated that last little tid bit. hahahahaha
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  12. 03-31-2004, 04:15 PM #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by BOUNCER
    Didn't think you had any
    Bouncer, why do you have a picture of Eminem in fatigues as your avatar?
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  13. 03-31-2004, 04:28 PM #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carlos_E
    Bouncer, why do you have a picture of Eminem in fatigues as your avatar?
    HAHA, hadn't noticed that.

    "I'm Slim Shady,
    yes I'm the real Shady
    All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
    So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up,
    please stand up,
    please stand up?"
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  14. 03-31-2004, 06:16 PM #14
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    Flame war!!! No good can come of this.......but **** is it funny.
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  15. 03-31-2004, 08:17 PM #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by chicamahomico
    Flame war!!! No good can come of this.......but **** is it funny.

    I'm not trying to flame anyone. I'm being serious. That isn't Eminem?
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  16. 03-31-2004, 08:53 PM #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carlos_E
    I'm not trying to flame anyone. I'm being serious. That isn't Eminem?
    Oh I get it...you were implying that all white people look alike
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  17. 03-31-2004, 10:15 PM #17
    KeyMastur
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    Hey, **** you old man. Nice contribution to a thread I took time to write. Next time you have a really constructive comment make sure you write it down nice and neat, put it in a coke bottle, and shove it the **** up your ass.
    what's the matter hoss ? didn't get enough of your flintstone vitamins this morning ??
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  18. 03-31-2004, 10:28 PM #18
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    LOL you sly c**t........nice turnaround you pulled on me there LOL

    And KeyMastur, you better stop throwing potshots....WanneBeNathan doesn't think it's funny LOL

    Quote Originally Posted by Carlos_E
    I'm not trying to flame anyone. I'm being serious. That isn't Eminem?
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  19. 03-31-2004, 10:30 PM #19
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    lol oh man haha
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  20. 03-31-2004, 10:51 PM #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by KeyMastur
    what's the matter hoss ? didn't get enough of your flintstone vitamins this morning ??
    No, I did not. I was a little dizzy, and my cock ached from ramming your mother all night long.
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  21. 04-01-2004, 05:37 AM #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    No, I did not. I was a little dizzy, and my cock ached from ramming your mother all night long.
    typical high school comeback line.
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  22. 04-01-2004, 06:30 AM #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by KeyMastur
    typical high school comeback line.
    Sometimes it's best to go back to basics, as opposed to using one line half-ass quips that lack wit, punctuation, or any sort of grammatical structure.
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  23. 04-01-2004, 06:41 AM #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by KeyMastur
    ok nathan wanna be
    Are you getting tierd of these lame attempts aswell?
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  24. 04-01-2004, 06:53 AM #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by palme
    Are you getting tierd of these lame attempts aswell?
    Then don't ****ing read it. No one asked you to. Just because you both went on the rag at the same time of the month, doesn't give you license to talk ****.
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  25. 04-01-2004, 07:10 AM #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    Then don't ****ing read it. No one asked you to. Just because you both went on the rag at the same time of the month, doesn't give you license to talk ****.
    Normally i dont read your threads, but i was bored.

    If you had your own style it would be funny but your just copycating Nathan.
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  26. 04-01-2004, 08:13 AM #26
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    Palme...I don't think his style is a copycat of Nathan's. There's a thread where Rambo calls out Nathan that I thought was **** funny.....and you can see how they differ. I find both to be funny as hell and I'm extremly pleased both are here.....between them both I've sprayed at least a six pack of diet coke on my PC. Not to mention they do offer some good advice and input.

    Now how about a great big group hug? No grabbing my ass Palme......not until the kids leave the room. hahahahahaha
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  27. 04-01-2004, 08:15 AM #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Juggernaut2148
    Palme...I don't think his style is a copycat of Nathan's. There's a thread where Rambo calls out Nathan that I thought was **** funny.....and you can see how they differ. I find both to be funny as hell and I'm extremly pleased both are here.....between them both I've sprayed at least a six pack of diet coke on my PC. Not to mention they do offer some good advice and input.

    Now how about a great big group hug? No grabbing my ass Palme......not until the kids leave the room. hahahahahaha
    haha....well said juggy...well said
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  28. 04-01-2004, 10:11 AM #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Juggernaut2148
    Now how about a great big group hug? No grabbing my ass Palme......not until the kids leave the room. hahahahahaha
    Who wants to grabb that saggy ass? Face it bigman your getting oooold! Soon its diapers and mashed fruit for you.
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  29. 04-01-2004, 10:35 AM #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by palme
    Who wants to grabb that saggy ass? Face it bigman your getting oooold! Soon its diapers and mashed fruit for you.

    now that is some funny sh1t
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  30. 04-01-2004, 10:44 AM #30
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    Flushhhhhhhhh
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  31. 04-01-2004, 10:46 AM #31
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    ok, so i was wrong and thats funnier...lol
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  32. 04-01-2004, 12:03 PM #32
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    The members of this board are entitled to share their opinion(s) with you, and at AR we're even obligated to be nice about it. I think your threads are d**n funny, but I seriously doubt you would have ever started posting threads like this in a Nathan free universe.

    Quote Originally Posted by rambo
    Then don't ****ing read it. No one asked you to. Just because you both went on the rag at the same time of the month, doesn't give you license to talk ****.
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  33. 04-01-2004, 12:07 PM #33
    BOUNCER
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carlos_E
    Bouncer, why do you have a picture of Eminem in fatigues as your avatar?

    I was going to ask about Micheal Jackson fist fcuking himself in yours
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  34. 04-01-2004, 12:13 PM #34
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    mine are... a bit over producing at my age ;p But way over!!
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