Basic Rules For Driving In The Toronto Area

[Shredz]

I am sure that this applies to more then just Toronto since I have seen this all over the place. But I thought I would post it for you guys/gals to get a kick out of it.

BASIC RULES FOR DRIVING IN THE TORONTO AREA
1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real Toronto driver
never uses them.

2. Under no circumstance should you leave a safe distance between you
and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody
else, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

3. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance
you have of getting hit.

4. Never, ever come to a complete stop at a stop sign. No
one expects it and it will result in you being rear-ended.

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive bodywork.
Ontario is a no-fault insurance province and the other guy doesn't have
anything to lose.

6. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that
your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake
pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch
your legs.

7. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good
way to scare people entering the highway.

8. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as a suggestion and
are apparently not enforceable in Toronto during rush hour

9. Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or
move over doesn't mean that a Toronto driver flashing his high beams
behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.

10. Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident or even
someone changing a tire.

11. Learn to swerve abruptly. Toronto is the home of the high-speed
slalom driving thanks to the Provincial Highway Department, which puts
potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on
their toes.

12. It is traditional in Toronto to honk your horn at cars that don't
move the instant the light turns green

13. Remember that the goal of every Toronto driver is to get there first
by whatever means necessary.

14. In the Toronto area, 'flipping someone the bird' is considered
polite Toronto salute. This gesture should always be returned.

15. At least four more cars should proceed on a left after the light
turns red. If you fail to do so, you will be rear-ended.

16. The highways can also be used to dispose of any messy garbage that
may be lying around. These items are better off cluttering the side of
the road then cluttering your car's interior where they may distract you
and cause an accident.

17. If someone cuts you off you should return the gesture by speeding
around them on the right, pulling in front of them and slamming on the
brakes. This works even better when your car is of lesser value.

18. Never make eye contact with another driver when passing through
Scarborough. Nuff said! [/B]

[Babyweight]

I follow #4 daily..

Babyweight

[groverman1]

I hope your not driving the engine.

[juicehoe]

LMAO most of those are the same here.... i live in "god's waiting room", so the oldster's must have a copy of this

[Money Boss Hustla]

Shredz are you Canadian!?

[Shredz]

Shredz are you Canadian!?

Yes bro, from the Toronto area!!

[Shredz]

I hope your not driving the engine.

Of course I do bro, just gotta make sure you keep the lights and sirens on all the time. Expecially when we are headin' back from calls to watch the rest of the hockey game!!

[Tedmax195]

Just moved to To in August and i gotta tell yah, i have become a very different driver compared to the way i used to drive up North. What a wake up call driving in this city.

[Money Boss Hustla]

Yes bro, from the Toronto area!!

I just remember you saying that Philly is going to bring the cup home...so I thought you were in Philly.

Go Flyers!

[D00fy]

good info ,i live in south florida, hurricane season a bitch, rain everyday.......

here is some important SHELTER tips while staying indoors

1)Lots of Weed,Get High,Watch Tv High,Talk on the phone High, Workout High,Eat High,Jerk Off HIGH,

2) Lots of liquids since you get dehydrate from weed

3) A good Selection of DVDs or for some of you oldies "VHS CASSETTE TAPE"

4) Lots of Good food,consider it a cheat day

5) A Bitch to **** after dvds get bored

6) Shotgun ,when the tornado is over and you see ****ers trying to robb you

7) An emergency Joint,just in case u smoked all your weed,u have hidden stash

[D00fy]

oh **** me **** me ,i thought it was a tornado thread

u obvisously know i smoke to much fking weed haha

[navydevildoc]

****, this could be SoCal too...

[juicehoe]

oh **** me **** me ,i thought it was a tornado thread

u obvisously know i smoke to much fking weed haha

brutal

[ChiTownTommy]

for the most part it sounds like your driving in Chicago,

[TPAK]

I had to spend a week in Toronto for work. The f'ing traffic was crazy. I left on Friday night at rush hour. Took me 4.5 hours to get to Niagra Falls. Talk about road rage. **** I was about to flip out. I remember seeing the traffic signs and not a single person was even close to what they said. Crazy place!

[Full Intensity]

ahahah those are all sooo true. Driving over here is nuts, its like an adrenaline rush every time. AND RETURN MY PM's MOFO! ( <-- that was for shredz) lol