Starting up new cycle following a drug addiction...

With out getting too much into detail, i have been into bodybuilding and Juicing for 7 years now. Done some massive cycles back in the days 2g test + stuff like that. This is really readers digest versions but i got really addicted to prescription pain meds for about a year and then that escaleted to fullblown oxycontin and cocaine addiction and by the end was herion. Long story short i'm lucky to be alive and have such a wonderful family... I went to an impaitent rehababiltaion for 60 days the 1st of March. The last shot of steroids i did was in december of 04 but keep in mind i was a full blown junkie and just ran whatever was there at the time... All that being said, heres my delemia... I have all my shit ready and want to do a big cycle and then actually cycle off... unlike my past where i just stayed on years at a time... I want to gain 20 or so pounds and then come off for another 6 months at a minimum.. Main reason is i want to stay away from that old addict behavior where i always need something, weather to get High or get big, same thing. So i want to go all out and really put on size, tell me what you think, do i need higher MG??

Test 400 by Denkal 800mgs pw 1-12
Deca 300 by QV 300mg pw 1-12
Fina home brewed 100mg ED 1-12
Slin 10ius's pd 1-4 and 10-14

Yes, i have ran Deca and Fina many times together with no problems... however is 300mg to low? I'm just thinking with 7 months off, after about 3.5 years pretty much straight being ON, that those doses may be suffcient. I do have enough deca to go 450mg or even 600mg.... 600 is what i use to run about a year and a half ago... thats the last time i did deca.

Sorry such a long strang post, i guess i just like it to be known that i myself am a recovering drug addict and would love to lend a helping hand to anyone going through the same shit, i dont have too much time behind my belt but i'm passionate about it and feel i could help another bb out. ANyway, thanks for the time! Let me know what you all think i could change... Money isnt really an issue... Only roid i have ever disliked has been Winny... too expensicve and too hard on joints. Oh and state right now are 5'9 212 with about 9 or 10% bf.... use to be around 235 solid before i got addicted to drugs. want to get back up around there.!

Have 75mg Drols on hand as well... looking for more quality weight however... that is a possibility though!

Juice,

Man, congratulations on getting clean, those pain kilers are a Biaaaatttccchhh!! I know, I too had a major addiction that finally ended 4 years 8 months ago. It began however, from 2 herniated disks I developed in 98' from going all out on squats while on cycle I was 29 at the time and in my prime...physically speaking. I was 225 lbs @10% body fat (6'1"), I was in the best shape I had ever been and then the back injury came. I had to give up lifting for 2 years (Drs.' orders) and in that time I became so depressed I latched on to the pain meds and what's funny (funny in a sick sort of way) is the more pills I ate---the more the Drs. would write for me and when it finally ended almost 5 years ago now, I was shooting morphine and eating 15-20 percocet 10s a day...no I did not type that wrong 15-20 a day. Only by the grace of God am I still here...and believe it or not my liver still works too! LOL!

Anyway bro, it took me loosing absolutely everything, and I mean everything before I finally had enough and got the help I needed. And gradually over time I was able to start training again and working myself back into the shape I had been before the addiction, but I did not run another cycle until last June, a year ago. I waited almost 3 years to run another cycle because I needed that time to get my head right, to make sure that i wasn't going to pick up the drugs when they came calling again. I am not going to comment on your cycle, except to say that I ran deca and tren together last year with some test of course and had great results too, the deca was basically to aid in mobility of my joints, at 36 everything takes a little bit longer to recover. I know this has been a long post, but I just want to encourage you to make sure that you have given yourself enough time (mentally and emotionally) to recover since you've been clean.
It's easy to fall back into that mindset you spoke of...."I need something...anything to look good or feel good." Because the desire or temptation for the painkillers WILL COME AGAIN write it down, it's going to happen, just be ready and able to tell yourself NO! when it does. Stay strong...in the Spirit.

Sorry for the length of this post guys and if it was off topic.

Ran

ranran i tried to send you a PM but you dont get them did you ever live in a place that started with a M and ended in a E this is JS think real hard you have beed to my house many of time

Helllo my friends i was also a drug friend, i did the rehab thing three times, fianlly i got clean for three years. just within the last few months i have started drinking again... not heavily, and definitely staing away from the damn drugs, good job my friend, i fully understand the pain involved in getting clean, it is awful, and a horrible thing to go through.. anyways bro how was kickin the dope.....if these guys only new, makes tren sides feel like a swedish massage. anyway bro just keep the juicin under control, do not let it become your life, remember for those like us its spirituality that must be the center of life, not hugeness, its not fair but drug addicts are prone to fu*king up their lives, if you use your addictive behavior with juice, you will probably die just like if you used it with the drugs, and you know this my friend, feel free to pm me if you wanna chat. Regards, nomore1324

nope sorry didnt read all the post you are a little older you arent who i was thinking of sorry

oh yes my friend i must truly tell you that i believe you must get more clean time under your belt, just to get life straightened out before returning to the juice, get your six months, hit your m's every week, and talk to the s ED, then after about 6 months or a year try it out.

Pin,

No problem, but you definitely had my brain smoking bro, trying to remember...but that period of my life is a little foggy.

Ran

nomore,

Swedish massage LOL, -----well come to think of it that does sound kind of nice, I mean this was leg day after all and my quads are killing me. But no joke... you're right, painful, very... painful. Night sweats from tren got nothin' on the sweats from opiods, the morphine come down almost killed me. I forgot to add in my reply to juice, I ended up at 165 Lbs. when I finally hit the wall.

Ran

lol ran ran, but es im glad you identify tren aint got nuthin on dope as far as pain goes.

Wow thanks for the comments guys, truly nice and postive encouragment. Thanks again, it means a lot. Good point on giving myself a little more time, i'm thinking i will, but to be completely honest, i'm probably only thinking maybe 2 or 3 more months... maybe hit my 9 month mark and give it a go. Thats just being honest. As far as the cycle... You hit it on the head that i dont want to go back to that "alitte is okay so a ton must be better" attitude in regards to doses and what not... so you think what i have is suffcient enough?

bro running a 14 weeker directly following gettting clean is definitely more than enough my friend

Gratz on kicking the drugs! Your cycle looks good but you may want to up the deca to at least 400 to get some benefit from it. 300 of deca just barely lubes my joints.