My experience with steroids...

**GotMilk?** · 11-10-2005, 04:09 AM

The cycle I just finished I plan on being my last...I thought that taking steroids would get me big....and then I would get more respect from people and that I would get more attention from the ladies. That was the biggest lie out there.
I am 20 years old now and have done 4 cycles already. What have I got to show for it ?? Nothing but a big body, acne, stretch marks and -$3000 in my bank account. All I was concerned about the last couple of years was bodybuilding, eating and sleeping. I put everything else on hold, i am still making minimum wage $10 working security and have accomploshed nothing with my life. A couple of my friends are in the same boat as me and they are going nowhere fast.
I have just started seeing a counsellor now once a week, my parents are paying $100 for one hour with him a week. The thing that worries me a lot is losing a lot of the size that I have put on. But I really am trying to stop what I feel is a physycological addiction to the juice.
Here are a couple pics of me all natural at 17 years old around 190 lbs. Girls tell me I looked better then than I do now. I am 260lbs with 12-14% bf.

**elitetky** · 11-10-2005, 04:25 AM

bro look good man but its the pic you said u r now or when u r 3years ago ?

bro pm me i got some to ask u in private

**GotMilk?** · 11-10-2005, 04:29 AM

Originally Posted by elitetky

bro look good man but its the pic you said u r now or when u r 3years ago ?

bro pm me i got some to ask u in private

that is me 3 years ago... Ill post up pics of the freak I turned into tommorow...

**elitetky** · 11-10-2005, 04:47 AM

ok man make sure u r one hell of the freaking man

**wascaptain5214** · 11-10-2005, 05:05 AM

well........i think you started to young, ....big and bad dont get respect, you have to earn it........your right about woman, im 50 and still cant figure-em out......zits and stretch marks, oh well it happens, but you can controll it.... everyone cant be rich.......we cant be all winners we need losers too...oh and for the shrink thing.......get over it..............................good luck bro, hang in there it will work out

**Hazeyshade** · 11-10-2005, 05:08 AM

Dont look natural to me in those pics

**Gra** · 11-10-2005, 05:12 AM

Originally Posted by Hazeyshade

Dont look natural to me in those pics

So you`re saying that there is no chance to get some muscles without juice??

**GotMilk?** · 11-10-2005, 05:15 AM

Originally Posted by Hazeyshade

Dont look natural to me in those pics

hahahaha lol ill take that as a compliment... I am lucky to have good genetics I guess... My dad being Austrian and my mom German....I didnt have a problem putting on muscle and recovering fast. And believe me...in those pics ....there are people twice my size who are all natural.

**zircon** · 11-10-2005, 05:24 AM

well. Yes I feel where you're coming from. As well as the woman thing, I also have my issues even though I'm already 28. The main diff between you and me though is at 18 I was 52kg...yes, abotu 110 lbs. Let me tell you, that is no fun. Its all good in saying that yes size doesnt count blablabla, but guess what? We're all human. I got it drilled into my head that being that small, made life ****in difficult for me, so now I dont really care.

I'm still very careful with roids, more so than most. I run test 500mg per week maybe 18 weeks per year, which is quite low compared to what most do here. I've made good gains, yet with women and self confidence in geenral, it has helped somewhat, but not that much as I'd hoped to.

As for zits, get accutane and sort it out fbefore you go on cycle again.

You have to understand, the AAS work. But. But. If you take them to solve other issues (even like im doign now), it can do damage. I'm also seeing someone to sort some of my shit out. But I'm having fun, being sensible about aas usage, so far. Just hope it doesnt change

**ODC0717** · 11-10-2005, 05:24 AM

Originally Posted by GotMilk?

I would get more respect from people and that I would get more attention from the ladies. That was the biggest lie out there.
I am 20 years old now and have done 4 cycles already. What have I got to show for it ?? Nothing but a big body, acne, stretch marks and -$3000 in my bank account.

All I've got to say is that that sucks bro. IMO, I think you got into bodybuilding for the wrong reasons. Did you ever compete? did you have aspirations to compete? Don't get upset because you didn't get the respect and ladies you were promised before you began this venture. A bigger body has nothing to do with respect and getting ladies. To me, bodybuilding is a chance for me to create something that not a lot of peole do, or have the will power to do. Bodybuilding, to me, be it natural or chemically enhanced is about the individual doing it, and they do so because they don't look at it as a pain in the ass, they look at working out as a labor of love. I genuinley love lifting weights. Squatting till I puke makes me feel savage like becaue I took it to the pain barrier and beyond. How many cat can say they did that? Everytime I go into the gym it has a sort of cleansing effect on me. I can focus all my anger, all my hate, all my rage into these intense bouts with myself, and I always come out better. This is what I'd reccommend for you, find what initially turned you on to bodybuilding. Was it size, strength, vanity, self-conciousness? Whatever the reason may be, once you find it then you need to use that as your energy to push yourself. I know a lot of the feeling you're going through. My ex worked at the gym I go to, and we were together for 3 years, and had plans to get married. One day, all that went away in the blink of an eye. 8 months later I was eating once every other day (yeah, no shit! You wanna talk about depression) and lost about 35lbs. That's when I realized that bodybuilding can not be your main focus in life unless it's your profession. Why you ask? Because we all need balance in our life. Balance work with family life, and religion (is you have one), and money. It's been my experience that if one of these are out of balance, a lot of shit will get fvcked up as a result. Either you spent too much time in the gym and not enough time with your wife or girl or family. Or you're working 18 hour days 6 days a week and basically are a Sunday dad or boyfriend or son for that matter. Balance is key in life. I hope you the best and a quick recovery from your depression. On a side note, if you need a listening ear, other then the shrink, you can always PM me, bro. I know first hand how much it sucks to have a cascade of emotions coarsing through your body with no one to say anything to. Take care bro. Oh, and by they way, you were one swole MFer natty.

**Hazeyshade** · 11-10-2005, 05:25 AM

Yes take it as a compliment, but there are no people twice your size all natural at seventeen.

**Hazeyshade** · 11-10-2005, 05:30 AM

Originally Posted by Gra

So you`re saying that there is no chance to get some muscles without juice??

Even you know thats not what Im saying

**Danbrooks2k** · 11-10-2005, 05:48 AM

cry me a river... I have been juicing for years... i went from a 137lb 6 foot 2 guy to a 220ish 6foot2 guy... I have my own self ran web design firm and because of my high test levels and much better body I got to do some porn work for a few big companies...

I home brew all my juice now and even a big cycle isnt going to cost me over 200$ unless I want to use anavar or primo...

sounds to me like you are a slacker, or just have your priorities all messed up, at 20 I was in the army sitting in iraq... trust me after that lifes little troubles seem very silly in perspective...

get a good job, get off the juice if you hate it so much and quit crying, nobody stuck a needle in your ass... i wonder if the kids you bullied have any sympathy for you... sounds like wanting to be a tough guy bit you right in the ass!

got alot of growing up to do...

**mx747** · 11-10-2005, 05:53 AM

dood, I know you feel like youve ruined your life but YOUR ONLY 20!!!!!!!!!!!!
Acne and some stretchmarks? When I was 18 not only was I super self consious
about my wimpy 150 lb frame, I had to figure out how to support a wife and kid.
with nothing but a highschool diploma and a bad police record. peer pressure can be a bitch when your looking for respect from the ladies or any one else for that matter.
Remember most men your age are pissing away life right now In college doing the same crap youve allready realized. So assume you have a head start in knowing what you do and consider your self extreamly lucky that the only negs were acne,strech marks and a little bit of debt. Loose the shrink and realize you just grew up!!!
good luck!!!!

**Testostack** · 11-10-2005, 05:57 AM

Originally Posted by GotMilk?

The cycle I just finished I plan on being my last...I thought that taking steroids would get me big....and then I would get more respect from people and that I would get more attention from the ladies. That was the biggest lie out there.
I am 20 years old now and have done 4 cycles already. What have I got to show for it ?? Nothing but a big body, acne, stretch marks and -$3000 in my bank account. All I was concerned about the last couple of years was bodybuilding, eating and sleeping. I put everything else on hold, i am still making minimum wage $10 working security and have accomploshed nothing with my life. A couple of my friends are in the same boat as me and they are going nowhere fast.
I have just started seeing a counsellor now once a week, my parents are paying $100 for one hour with him a week. The thing that worries me a lot is losing a lot of the size that I have put on. But I really am trying to stop what I feel is a physycological addiction to the juice.
Here are a couple pics of me all natural at 17 years old around 190 lbs. Girls tell me I looked better then than I do now. I am 260lbs with 12-14% bf.

Man, WTF??!
You started juicing at 17 and just for ladies n respect?! Ok First, you look good, i won't deny it, but w/ all due respect, you are one of fu(king asshole doing that, you just screwed your hormones and risked trouble at that age.....plus you limited the benefits of AAS by starting at an age at which you could have done far better....that said, now that you can't turn the clock back......well take it easy and try to ease up on AAS for a while.....JMO

**zircon** · 11-10-2005, 06:16 AM

yeah strange thing. Sometimes the ladies can be even more demanding if you have a great body, cos they expect you to have great confidence and everything right. Just the way it is.

In the end it works back to working on yourself and self esteem. You have a lot of time left, I was 27 before I realised what is really important in my life (I have money, body, everything except good relationships), and I realise these are the important things, at least for me. In life, there are always the lessons, and the best ones are the really tough ones (which you NEVER forget), and you LEARN from.

Whatever you do, make it a priority to learn from this. Not sure how, but it is possible.

All the best.

PS I don't blame him for juicing at 17. I probably wouldnt have done it, but I sure woulda been tempted weighing in at 100 pounds and bein ****ed all over the place by someone twice my size. You only know what its like when u been in the shoes eh?

**zircon** · 11-10-2005, 06:19 AM

question - when you talk to the psych, what do you talk about? Do you find out thigns about your past that come out? PM me, maybe I can help. I've been through something similar.

**Froggy** · 11-10-2005, 06:51 AM

Thank you for sharing bro...I like hearing these testimonials...
Remember...its your life...

**vitor** · 11-10-2005, 07:20 AM

If you dont want acne dont use test, simple. Strechmarks? use aas that dont blow you up to fast, t-bol, primo, winstrol , eq and var. (This wont give you any aggression either or mental problems either) Its got alot to do with the drugs and cycles you use. Yust because the follow-up crowd here says no test no cycle doesnt make it right! You have to think for your-self.

**magic32** · 11-10-2005, 07:47 AM

Thanks.

M.

**Testostack** · 11-10-2005, 08:05 AM

Originally Posted by zircon

yeah strange thing. Sometimes the ladies can be even more demanding if you have a great body, cos they expect you to have great confidence and everything right. Just the way it is.

In the end it works back to working on yourself and self esteem. You have a lot of time left, I was 27 before I realised what is really important in my life (I have money, body, everything except good relationships), and I realise these are the important things, at least for me. In life, there are always the lessons, and the best ones are the really tough ones (which you NEVER forget), and you LEARN from.

Whatever you do, make it a priority to learn from this. Not sure how, but it is possible.

All the best.

PS I don't blame him for juicing at 17. I probably wouldnt have done it, but I sure woulda been tempted weighing in at 100 pounds and bein ****ed all over the place by someone twice my size. You only know what its like when u been in the shoes eh?

Yeah yeah, but i don't think that's worth taking the risk of screwing my hormones and perhaps my future....JMO

**Testostack** · 11-10-2005, 08:10 AM

Originally Posted by Danbrooks2k

cry me a river... I have been juicing for years... i went from a 137lb 6 foot 2 guy to a 220ish 6foot2 guy... I have my own self ran web design firm and because of my high test levels and much better body I got to do some porn work for a few big companies...

I home brew all my juice now and even a big cycle isnt going to cost me over 200$ unless I want to use anavar or primo...

sounds to me like you are a slacker, or just have your priorities all messed up, at 20 I was in the army sitting in iraq... trust me after that lifes little troubles seem very silly in perspective...

get a good job, get off the juice if you hate it so much and quit crying, nobody stuck a needle in your ass... i wonder if the kids you bullied have any sympathy for you... sounds like wanting to be a tough guy bit you right in the ass!

got alot of growing up to do...

For the bold thangs i tip you my hat, cuz eventhough i'm french and have nuttin to do w/ that Irak thang, i do really respect people who had fought overthere, and what you just said about growing up makes really sense.......Sometimes we just loose sight what's really important and what's not....meaning of things.
Again, Cheers up for you!

**Haro3** · 11-10-2005, 09:37 AM

3000$ thats steep bro even for 4 cycles......and as far as ruining your life, you made the choice to use them but i think the general agreement on this board would be that steroids helped most peoples lives, whether its more self esteem, or healthier life style, or just an over all better mental attitude. If i was to guess something else is at fault here and you're trying to blaime the steroids, but thats strictly my guess. Sounds like you got into aas for the wrong reasons, such as getting the girls. Sorry man it doesnt always work out like that. I dont mean to offend you it's just that I've been seeing these stories on the news and it is all so much bs and it's stories like yours that when the media gets ahold of it become front page articles about how "steroids are bad". Sorry if i offended u bro ur post just made me have to vent a lil...

**shortie** · 11-10-2005, 09:44 AM

I think Got Milk is just figuring out that self confidence, self image, and personal success with others doesn't come from one's biceps, it comes from being ok with yourself and who you are. Good luck got milk-hope you find a life outside of the gym.

**SwoleCat** · 11-10-2005, 09:48 AM

Ignorance is common at a young age.

4 cycles before the age of 20.

Need I say more?

You have no idea what you are doing in regards to gear/DIET/training/etc., that's the issue.

~SC~

**NYGIANTS21** · 11-10-2005, 09:53 AM

Bro you are still young and have a lot of time to do things with yourself. Don't blame it on the gear, you just want something to fall back on. I think you started juice to young, 4 cycles already damn bro. Just keep your head up and stop looking for the ladies, when you are not looking they seem to always come out to play!!LOL. I was fuc*ing of in college all the way to when i was 23 and didn't have shi* to show for it, then i was called up to go to IRAQ and that opened the light for me, can home now i am an EMT getting ready to go to Fire Standards school. You just need a little push bro. Don't worry about the gear it will always be there, get your life in order then do what cycles you want. you don't want to be 50yrs old working at Mcdonalds. Tight'n up bro

If there is an 50 yr olds working at Mcdonalds sorry if I offended you.

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-10-2005, 09:57 AM

You know now that you cycled too early but we can't change that now so get over it.

You're only 20! You have your whole future ahead of you.

**Swifto** · 11-10-2005, 10:01 AM

You have only yourself to blame.

Steroids didnt mess you up, you decided to take them. You didnt fall over accidently poke yourself with 1ML of Test Enan.

Cycling at such a young age (17) it proves your poor lack of knowledge and research was also to blame.

**Hackamaniac** · 11-10-2005, 10:01 AM

Hang in there man you'll be okay everybody has there ups and downs and once you think you've hit rock bottom all you can do is go up so good luck bro.

**SMYL_GR8** · 11-10-2005, 10:05 AM

Originally Posted by Swifto

You have only yourself to blame.

Steroids didnt mess you up, you decided to take them. You didnt fall over accidently poke yourself with 1ML of Test Enan.

Cycling at such a young age (17) it proves your poor lack of knowledge and research was also to blame.

Scolding him now will not help. He's not a child, he's a 20 y.o. man. He needs support and advice.

**ThePump** · 11-10-2005, 10:21 AM

Originally Posted by Hazeyshade

Yes take it as a compliment, but there are no people twice your size all natural at seventeen.

i'm sorry but you must be a moron... there are ppl that are 2x his size and natural at 17. it happens. small minded ppl like yourself piss me off... they don't have to be juicing to be naturally blessed.

**SwoleCat** · 11-10-2005, 10:36 AM

Originally Posted by SMYL_GR8

Scolding him now will not help. He's not a child, he's a 20 y.o. man. He needs support and advice.

Yes, he does need to be scolded, as he's complaining of what gear did/did not do to him, and had he used INTELLIGENCE in his planning, none of this would have happened. Support and advice, well, too little too late.

~SC~

**Eddie8** · 11-10-2005, 10:53 AM

Originally Posted by shortie

I think Got Milk is just figuring out that self confidence, self image, and personal success with others doesn't come from one's biceps, it comes from being ok with yourself and who you are. Good luck got milk-hope you find a life outside of the gym.

Wow...lots of great post to this thread but I think shortie sums it up pretty well without being mean. All that being big and freaky is going to do for you is open a few doors or lines of communication for a certain group of people. Kind of like driving a new Lambo Gallardo, some people respond favorably and some are turned off. It is the man that steps out from behind the facade that either makes things happen or falls on his face. Can't wait to see your current pictures by the way. I say the glass is half full. You are 20, still wet behind the ears. The world is in front of you. Take what you have built, which I promise you is an asset whether you realize it or not, get ripped (women love that) and grow your charm and personality. I have found that in life and personal relationships you get back what you give. If you are not getting the response from life you want it is because your personality and character is not appealing to others, or possibly lack of drive outside of the gym, not your physically fit body. Dont think that all you have to do is show up with your body and people will fall at your feet, it is not that simple. I think a guy named Arnold proved this already. Good luck man, life is a journey not a destination. It is up to you to make it a good one.

**Lunacy** · 11-10-2005, 11:44 AM

This is good reading for the under 21 crew that want to jump on juice to solve all of life's problems that they face. I say this thread should be madatory reading for young, and old, newbies alike.

Sorry your life is in a rut bro, but thats just it, only a rut. Everyone has their ups and downs, but life goes on and so will yours. Hope everything works out for you and good luck.

**ultimate_beef** · 11-10-2005, 12:16 PM

wicked threads. Now from a point from a guy whos 18. I started last febuary on anabolics. I know most of you say "what a idiot", but many many guys on this forum started out as early as 16. IMO, "GOTMILK" started for the wrong reasons. And he should just stop, relax and restart his life. I started because I compete and many many people say I could go far. Not to be cocky, but 20-40 year old men ask me for tips all the time. Its my life bodybuilding. and thats why I started. And to "gotmilk" good luck.

**Haro3** · 11-10-2005, 12:23 PM

i agree that you shouldnt start to young but it is hard not to when you know quite a few people on this board all though telling you not to from personal experiences, actually started at a young age....no offense to you guys but i agree with it being hard not to...

**NotSmall** · 11-10-2005, 12:33 PM

Originally Posted by SwoleCat

Yes, he does need to be scolded, as he's complaining of what gear did/did not do to him, and had he used INTELLIGENCE in his planning, none of this would have happened. Support and advice, well, too little too late.

~SC~

Correct me if I'm wrong but I thought the idea of this board was to help people not berate them for past mistakes.

**Testostack** · 11-10-2005, 01:07 PM

Originally Posted by SwoleCat

Ignorance is common at a young age.

4 cycles before the age of 20.

Need I say more?

You have no idea what you are doing in regards to gear/DIET/training/etc., that's the issue.

~SC~

Best Of the Beast has spoken, just what we can is listen.......

**ticker502** · 11-10-2005, 03:39 PM

Sounds like to me your a f*ckin idiot.

Soory to tell you bro. If roids and getting bigger didnt help you with the ladies than your one sad individual. Thats something new for me to hear. You must be a total ass to them is all i can say. Most women love jacked guys. And roids even help with the confidence. And most women like a confident guy.

Stretch marks? Acne? Man get over it. You think your going to grow twice as fast as natural people, but not have any side effects? Your a fool.

**Testostack** · 11-10-2005, 04:02 PM

Originally Posted by ticker502

Sounds like to me your a f*ckin idiot.

Soory to tell you bro. If roids and getting bigger didnt help you with the ladies than your one sad individual. Thats something new for me to hear. You must be a total ass to them is all i can say. Most women love jacked guys. And roids even help with the confidence. And most women like a confident guy.

Stretch marks? Acne? Man get over it. You think your going to grow twice as fast as natural people, but not have any side effects? Your a fool.

A lil bit rough but 100% true!