Help me out Bros, need motivation

Ok folks, I was late mid cycle and hurt my neck somehow (on vacation). Been out of the Gym and eating like crap for a month now. Neck is better, I'm going to the fucking gym today even if I just ride the damn bike.

Oct 25th my cycle is over and on the 29th Clomid begins. My GOAL between now and then is to get back in the groove with my diet, and getting back in the gym.

I've been on a long hard cycle, and have gotten shit from it because of letting myself fall out of the groove. I knew better! The begining of the year I was kicking ass and taking names. Some of you may remember in 3.5 months I went from 240ish at 30+ BF to 180ish at 14%, that started in January. Today, I am at 174 and ~13-14% BF. As you can see this last cycle I fucked up with both diet and training, wasted ALOT of gear, and risked health issues for no gain

Had I NOT been on a cycle I fear that the diet I have gone too over the last two month would have ERASED ALOT of hard work from the begining of the year.

I am going off for at least 10 weeks to get my nads back, have blood work done to check test, liver, kidney, and everything else BEFORE I start my next cycle. I also have vowed to myself not to let this happen again.

Anyway, I've been down on myself over fucking this up and pissing away the last several months. I would appreciate some constructive critisism, feedback, and a swft kick in the ASS.

DMX

You have already made the first step...admitting to yourself you messed up. Now it's time to use that anger to your advantage. You have the right idea, get to the gym tonight regardless of what else you do, that will be your first goal, and when you get home take pride in the fact that you have accomplished goal #1. I would suggest taking small steps and making LOTS of short term goals (for example, my goal is 4 weight sessions this week, 5 good meals per day and only one cheat day). Be proud when the goal is accomplished and move forward to your next objective. The key is to write those goals down on paper and look at them every single fucking day!!! If you don't write them down...they don't exist..trust me!! It's a simple exercise but VERY effective in helping you stay on track. Good luck DMX and welcome back to the fold my man!!

Hey man, every fitness-conscious person i know slips up every once in a while. That's not necessarily a bad thing. I had a similar situation towards the end july. I hurt my shoulder and couldnt work out for well over a month. Being out of the gym kinda caused me to eat shitty and be lazy, so i started getting a little chunky. Once the shoulder got better, i decided that i might as well just start bulking early this year because i was plump already. Anyways, i'm back into it now, my stregth is back and then some, and i feel really good.
The weight loss that you mentioned is incredible! 240 lbs to 180 in three months is awesome. I recommend you try and remember the dedication and intensity you had at that point in time, and how good that made you feel. You know you can do it because you did it before. Don't worry about the "wasted" gear, thats in the past and there's nothing you can do about it. Focus on the future and what you gotta do to get there. Eye of the tiger, baby.

Thanks guys:-).

DMX