depression

**crj900** · 01-13-2004, 03:01 PM

About 2 years ago I met this girl through a church, she lives in Michigan, I live in Virginia. Well, pretty much i started to like her and for about a year I was depressed and always thinking about her. This was a year ago. Well this past year I have talked to her online and the phone some. But lately shes all I can think about. I am depressed so much and it hurts. I hate to admit it but I want to cry sometimes. The thing is my dad used to take trips up there and it seems that we will no longer be going up there at all. Its not like I wouldnt drive up there myself, but its an akward situation, its hard to explain but I wouldnt be able to go there my self and just visit her. I told her in the past that I liked her, but then later on when i finally got over it I told her that I realized that we lived so far away and that it was stupid to even try anything. I started a test dbol /drol cycle about a month and a half ago, could this be the reason for this? Why am I so depressed, its hard to eat sometimes. Is there anything I could take? Please help.

**diesel21** · 01-13-2004, 03:04 PM

i heard vit b12 a while back,, just go chill wit some friends..... takes time......

**motoxxxguy** · 01-13-2004, 03:05 PM

You should probably talk to a professional bro. I'm sure adding exogeneous hormones to your system doesn't help at all either. You really need to be in the right state of mind BEFORE starting any AAS use, or the problems will normally get worse before they get better. Talk to a doctor bro, and I hope you get this worked out with yourself.

-moto

**TheMudMan** · 01-13-2004, 03:07 PM

Originally Posted by motoxxxguy

You should probably talk to a professional bro. I'm sure adding exogeneous hormones to your system doesn't help at all either. You really need to be in the right state of mind BEFORE starting any AAS use, or the problems will normally get worse before they get better. Talk to a doctor bro, and I hope you get this worked out with yourself.

-moto

I agree....... good luck bro

**crj900** · 01-13-2004, 03:07 PM

Thats the thing I was fine before i started the cycle, now its like i wanna end it all w/ a gun to my head.

**RJM03** · 01-13-2004, 03:14 PM

Whoa, dont say stuff like that nothing is ever that bad. You probably have alot of estrogen in your system from the dbol and the drol, they aromatize easily and fairly quickly, if you havent been taking anti-e's your hormones are out of whack and probably causing an emotional rollercoaster for you. Get some nolva or l-dex when you take aromatiing AAS before you start, and see a doctor if you are feeling that bad about yourself.

**TheMudMan** · 01-13-2004, 03:14 PM

Originally Posted by crj900

Thats the thing I was fine before i started the cycle, now its like i wanna end it all w/ a gun to my head.

If you really feel that way then you need to go see someone........ Also, the AS isn't helping matters.

**diesel21** · 01-13-2004, 03:18 PM

dam, i get depressed a lot.......... but always try and use your head......

if you end things, you will never know what will happen in the future......

**SubmissionGrappler** · 01-13-2004, 03:20 PM

Take large amts of vitamin P .Sources are very easy to find.Seriously nothing cures that feeling like a new piece of tail.

**BUYLONGTERM** · 01-13-2004, 03:22 PM

Listen to the bro's. You have to see someone professionally. You shouldn't be that depressed over a girl you barely hang with. If anything, you should be excited you 2 are talking again. Be careful when coming off your cycle, thats when the depression could be the worst. How old are you?????

**monster.** · 01-13-2004, 03:32 PM

Unfortunately this sounds like depression, I can relate in some aspects. Bro, why don't you take a road trip just to hang out for a lil bit...It's not a big deal...I was in your shoes, and the only way i could tell if i had feelings for this paticular girl was to meet her in person.. i got off my ass and visited her, it's as simple as that, take a buddy with you.. No need to get depressed...

If you feel you need to talk to someone, by all means don't second guess yourself... I was in your shoes before identical, i had to see though i didn't care if it was in another state... I said fuk it, this may be a really cool person to meet... It's up to you bro...

**monster.** · 01-13-2004, 03:42 PM

Originally Posted by crj900

Its not like I wouldnt drive up there myself, but its an akward situation, its hard to explain but I wouldnt be able to go there my self and just visit her. I told her in the past that I liked her, but then later on when i finally got over it I told her that I realized that we lived so far away and that it was stupid to even try anything.

If you been talking to her for 2 years there shouldn't be any akwardness, thats a long ass time to keep in contact with someone.. If you go, just be yourself and let things flow, It's as simple as that...LOL i was nervous, but it was worth it.. If you don't think she is worth your time, then don't...

**Jackman** · 01-13-2004, 03:48 PM

I did fina and i think that ****ed with my head alot. If i didnt wana kill myself it was somone else....... and when i stoped i was pretty much back to normal.

**crj900** · 01-13-2004, 03:51 PM

ya i guess so, im soon to be 20

**SubmissionGrappler** · 01-13-2004, 04:02 PM

u are just puttin way too much emphasis on one girl at such a young age.For petes sake your 20 friggin years old!!! Go out and have fun with as many girls as you can til you get past 25 or so then look for a wife. IMO

**SubmissionGrappler** · 01-13-2004, 04:05 PM

TWO THINGS NOT TO DO BEFORE 25:

1.Juice
2.Marriage

**crj900** · 01-13-2004, 04:05 PM

i think its all in my head, i wish i knew a way to get rid of it. i just took 4 b12 vit.

**Solrock** · 01-13-2004, 04:47 PM

Originally Posted by RJM03

Whoa, dont say stuff like that nothing is ever that bad. You probably have alot of estrogen in your system from the dbol and the drol, they aromatize easily and fairly quickly, if you havent been taking anti-e's your hormones are out of whack and probably causing an emotional rollercoaster for you. Get some nolva or l-dex when you take aromatiing AAS before you start, and see a doctor if you are feeling that bad about yourself.

Have you been taking anti-e's? estrogen will definitely throw you out of whack. Definitely get some anti-e's.

**crj900** · 01-13-2004, 05:43 PM

ya im hoping thats it, i'll need to get some anti e

**LightWeightBaby** · 01-13-2004, 05:48 PM

go see a physc.....best thing i ever did. Maybe u need meds they help me tons

**wingsofazrael** · 01-13-2004, 05:59 PM

yeah bro, definitely goto a doc. depression isnt something to mess around with at all. you may wanna have your liver checked too...dbol and drol??? as far as the girl thing, take a bro with ya and go see her. i still have feelings for a girl that lives a few states away and i go and see her every few months and talk to her all the time. shes my best friend and if i had my way, it would be more. and if shed take me back id be there like white on rice. i love the girl im with now, and i dont cheat on her and wont ever, but its not the same love as the girl i wanna be back with. and i told her i was still in love with my ex when i got with her. and i told her if my ex ever wanted to get back together our relationship would have to be reevaluated. **** bro, im sorry...im hijacking your thread and now im getting depressed. anyways, goto a doc and get some help and they can help, trust me. sometimes its all about talking. anyways good luck with everything.

**crj900** · 01-13-2004, 09:39 PM

what would a doc do? give me meds? or just talk

**wingsofazrael** · 01-13-2004, 10:01 PM

maybe both man, who knows? that is why you have to go. they didnt give me anything when i went, but i had to goto regular therapy sessions for a while or until they thought i was stable.

**USfighterFC** · 01-13-2004, 11:50 PM

Yeah that sounds very much like depression andI'm sure many of the bro's here would agree when I say roids is the last thing you should be doing if you're feeling this way. Not eating is also another sign of depression. Honestly I started to feel pretty down of my test prop cycle and a little nutty too. If you discontinue using d-bols or finish your cycle (whichever comes first) the symptons should lighten up some. Honestly I would get some professional help and dont kill yourself over a girl man they're the last reason to do something like that. Relationship f*** ups happen to all of us and they suck everytime.

**curiousdude** · 01-14-2004, 03:46 AM

what type of test? believe it or not depression is more likely to occure with test cyp. according to some very exp. pros, this is exactly why they prefer test enth. combine that with dbol and drol and you're set up for a wild ride of emotion. i'd have to agree with the estrogen level evaluation. this can happen with deca also. you may be someone who is particularly susceptable to mood swings.
on a different note: you say you met her thru church and you're 20. perhaps your religious background is interferring. infatuation and religion don't mix very well. you may very well feel she's the one due to your age and religious background. i'm not a big fan of religious 'programming' on what to think and how to feel. fortunately, you can overcome.
give it a good jerk, relax, and feel better. get off the juice, avoid test and drol in the future. dbol, by the way comes with a sense of well-being as one of the sides.
you're too young to be doin' AS anyway. wait until you're at least 28 - 35, somewhere in there.

on a personal note: i'm in my late 30's. i was diagnosed at 31 with SAD ( social anxiety disorder), panic attacks, obsessive/compulsive disorder, and subsequent depression. this was all pre-AS days for me. when i tried cyp and deca, even though taking a medication, i felt like i did pre-diagnosis. the first time it happened i didn't know why. the second time, i dug deeper into the profiles and background of the 'supplements' i'd been using and found specific info to this topic. i stopped, flushed the system and have been good since. i no longer used test for a base, except for prop, i can tolerate that, but only for a jump start. after 30 days, no more prop. nolvadex also makes me moody.
you're best bet is to get off the sauce and see how you feel. seeking professional help will be a short stint as soon as they find out you're doin' AS. peace, CD.

**magnusson** · 01-14-2004, 04:36 AM

I don't think its depression I think your really into the girl, I actually am in this same situation right now. My girl who is cooler than any chick I have ever met lives about 2 and half hours away from me.

I ****in hate to say it but I think the best way to get through the situation is to **** around with local bitches until u are able to see your girl, thats how I have been able to cope with the situation and I talk to her every other night. Don't start feelin shes the only reason to live cause then u will just become a depressed peice of **** who will just end his life for no reason and never be remembered, just another statistic who did'nt deserve to breathe fresh air.