Thread: Catholics invade newstands
02-03-2006, 12:44 AM #1
Catholics invade newstands
"Catholics all over the world are rushing to newstands and blowing themselves up in protest of cartoons and jokes printed about priest fondeling young boys.
"The Catholic Extremist Militants are enraged by the cartoons and say they disgrace Catholism. They will continue to mame and murder all non-catholic non-believers, as well as detonating themselves with home-made explosives, until the World understands that catholics are peaceful people that would never hurt anyone."
- WEBULLSHIT NEWS
Yeah - RIGHT!
Hmmm... that's not right...
02-03-2006, 03:37 AM #2
"The Star of David (in Hebrew Magen Da'vid) has been altered into a Nazi Swastika in numerous Arab-Muslim newswires. The alteration of the Jewish symbol has caused a wave of outrage among Jews world-wide. Jewish freedom fighters have stormed the Saudi Arabian embassy in London. More Jewish militants have begun to kidnap Muslim school teachers across Israel. Rioting has caused numerous other deaths. The outrage and violence is beginning to spread across a myriad of nations and there seems to be no end to the anger. All of this was sparked by Arab-Muslim newspapers, which printed the cartoons of the altered Jewish Star. Arab-Muslim media are claiming their right to 'freedom of the press' and 'freedom of speech' but Jewish militants are not accepting this claim. They find the cartoon disrespectful to the point that wide-spread violence is acceptable and Rabbis are giving their religious support, which only seem to inflame the situation. It seems that freedom to speak one's mind is only acceptable to certain groups."
February 3, 2006. Copyright of The Times
02-03-2006, 04:15 AM #3
4 FEB 2006
Ulaanbaatar -- Catholic extremists meet with Jewish freedom fighters to unite with hidden Mongolian factions that support the over throw of freedom of speech and religion propaganda. The expected manpower of this three-way treaty could severely threaten how World publications choose to depict lifestyle and cultures through terror. The CEJEWFREMON (Catholic Extremists, Jewish Freedom Fighters and Mongolian Militia) will kidnap and torture civilians to arrange peace talks about censored publications with their respective nations.
The Rabbis and Priests will set aside religious differences to fight this War on Expression. They will begin their recruitment in Mongolian religious temples by acting as a voice from God, there to help them provide for their families – but the manipulated individuals later find the true price of this new employment.
“At first they told me to burn 16 boxes of documents per week for a very nice salary,” said an anonymous Mongolian CEJEWFREMON supporter. “Then this week they told me to burn myself - inside a Danish news station!”
Children will also be recruited as suicide bombers to meet CEJEWFREMON manpower quotas.
CEJEWFREMON refused to comment or answer our calls.
02-03-2006, 04:21 AM #4
Something must be done about these radical Catholics!!!
02-03-2006, 04:25 AM #5Originally Posted by Bigen12
02-03-2006, 05:55 AM #6Originally Posted by MilitiaGuy
02-03-2006, 05:58 AM #7
02-03-2006, 02:50 PM #8
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