Found this on bolexI have to say number 5 impresses me. **** if that isnt the fart king holy ****, killing himself and putting another man in hospital because of his lethal gas lmao
Here are the 2004 Darwin Award nominees, if anyone cares.
> > > Hard to believe, but another year has passed. Once again, it's time for
> > > the Darwin Award Nominees. The Darwin's are awarded every year to
> > > the persons who died in the most stupid manner, thereby removing
> > > themselves from the gene pool. This year's nine nominees are:
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 1: [San Jose Mercury News]:
> > > An unidentified man, using a shotgun like a club to
> > > break a former girlfriend's windshield, accidentally
> > > shot himself to death when the gun discharged,
> > > blowing a hole in his gut.
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 2: [Kalamazoo Gazette]:
> > > James Burns, 34, (a mechanic) of Alamo, MI, was
> > > killed in March as he was trying to repair what
> > > police describe as a "farm-type truck." Burns got a
> > > friend to drive the truck on a highway while Burns
> > > hung underneath so that he could ascertain the
> > > source of a troubling noise. Burns' clothes caught
> > > on something, however, and the other man found Burns
> > > "wrapped in the drive shaft."
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 3: [Hickory Daily Record]:
> > > Ken Charles Barger, 47, accidentally shot himself to
> > > death in December in Newton, NC. Awakening to the
> > > sound of a ringing telephone beside his bed, he
> > > reached for the phone but grabbed instead a Smith &
> > > Wesson 38 Special, which discharged when he drew it
> > > to his ear. (For whatever reason, residents of
> > > Southern states always seem to figure prominently
> > > among the Darwin nominees.)
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 4: [UPI, Toronto]:
> > > Police said a lawyer demonstrating the safety of
> > > windows in a downtown Toronto skyscraper crashed
> > > through a pane with his shoulder and plunged 24
> > > floors to his death. A police spokesman said Garry
> > > Hoy, 39, fell into the courtyard of the Toronto
> > > Dominion Bank Tower early Friday evening as he was
> > > explaining the strength of the building's windows to
> > > visiting law students. Hoy previously has conducted
> > > demonstrations of window strength according to
> > > police reports. Peter Lawson, managing partner of
> > > the firm Holden Day, told the Toronto Sun newspaper
> > > that Hoy was "one of the best and brightest" members
> > > of the 200-man association. (Nice to see another
> > > Canadian province getting into the awards.... The
> > > Maritimes always have been heavily involved.)
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 5: [Bloomberg News Service]:
> > > A terrible diet and a room with no ventilation are
> > > being blamed for the death of a man who was killed
> > > by his own gas emissions. There was no mark on his
> > > body, and an autopsy showed large amounts of methane
> > > gas in his system. His diet had consisted primarily
> > > of beans and cabbage (and a couple of other things).
> > > It was just the right combination of foods. It
> > > appears that the man died in his sleep from
> > > breathing the poisonous cloud that was hanging over
> > > his bed. Had he been outside or had his windows been
> > > opened, it wouldn't have been fatal. But the man was
> > > shut up in his nearly airtight bedroom. According to
> > > the article, "He was a big man with a huge capacity
> > > for creating "this deadly gas." Three of the
> > > rescuers got sick, and one was hospitalized.
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 6: [The News of the Weird]:
> > > Michael Anderson Godwin made News of the Weird
> > > posthumously. He had spent several years awaiting
> > > South Carolina's electric chair on a murder
> > > conviction before having his sentence reduced to
> > > life in prison While sitting on a metal toilet in
> > > his cell attempting to fix his small TV set, he bit
> > > into a wire and was electrocuted. (South Carolina
> > > entrants are always perennial favorites.)
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 7: [The Indianapolis Star]:
> > > A cigarette lighter may have triggered a fatal
> > > explosion in Dunkirk, IN. A Jay County man, using
> > > a cigarette lighter to check the barrel of a muzzle
> > > loader, was killed Monday night when the weapon
> > > discharged in his face, sheriff's investigators
> > > said. Gregory David Pryor, 19, died in his parents'
> > > rural Dunkirk home at about 11:30 PM. Investigators
> > > said Pryor was cleaning a 54-caliber muzzleloader
> > > that had not been firing properly. He was using the
> > > lighter to look into the barrel when the gunpowder ignited.
> > >
> > > Nominee No. 8: [Reuters, Mississauga, Ontario]:
> > > A man cleaning a bird feeder on the balcony of his
> > > condominium apartment in this Toronto suburb
> > > slipped and fell 23 stories to his death. Stefan
> > > Macko, 55, was standing on a wheeled chair when the
> > > accident occurred, said Inspector D'Arcy Honer of
> > > the Peel Regional Police. "It appears that the chair
> > > moved, and he went over the balcony," Honer said.
> > > (Another Ontario entry.... I wonder if people are
> > > moving there from the Maritime Provinces.)
> > >
> > > Finally, THE WINNER!!!: [Arkansas Democrat Gazette]:
> > > Two local men were injured when their pickup truck
> > > left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on
> > > State Highway 38 early Monday. Woodruff County
> > > deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly
> > > after midnight Monday. Thurston Poole, 33, of Des
> > > Arc, and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock, were
> > > returning to Des Arc after a frog gigging trip on an
> > > overcast Sunday night when Poole's pickup truck
> > > headlights malfunctioned.
> > >
> > > The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older-model truck
> > > had
> > > burned out. As a replacement fuse was not available,
> > > Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullet from his
> > > pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the
> > > steering-wheel column. Upon inserting the bullet
> > > the headlights again began to operate properly, and
> > > the two men proceeded on eastbound toward the White
> > > River Bridge.
> > >
> > > After traveling approximately 20
> > > miles, and just before crossing the river, the
> > > bullet apparently overheated, discharged, and struck
> > > Poole in the testicles.
> > >
> > > The vehicle swerved sharply right, exiting the
> > > pavement, and striking a tree. Poole suffered only
> > > minor cuts and abrasions from the accident, but will
> > > require extensive surgery to repair the damage to
> > > his testicles, which will never operate as intended.
> > > Wallis sustained a broken clavicle and was treated
> > > and released.
> > >
> > > "Thank God we weren't on that bridge
> > > when Thurston shot his balls off, or we might both
> > > be dead," stated Wallis. "I've been a trooper for 10
> > > years in this part of the world, but this is a first
> > > for me. I can't believe that those two would admit
> > > how this accident happened," said Snyder.
> > > Upon being notified of the wreck, Lavinia (Poole's
> > > wife) asked how many frogs the boys had caught and
> > > did anyone get them from the truck???
> > >
> > > (Though Poole and Wallis did not die as a result of
> > > their misadventure as normally required by Darwin
> > > Award Official Rules, it can be argued that Poole
> > > DID, in fact, effectively remove himself from the
> > > gene pool.)
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Originally Posted by spkmania
