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Thread: To break up or not to break up ?
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02-11-2004, 03:42 PM #1
To break up or not to break up ?
I am not sure if I want to break up with me girl or not? She is a real great gal! She is caring, giving, real supportive, trust worthy, everything you could really ask for but there is just a few things that bug the **** out of me.
For one, she is constantly saying I love you, how much she cares, she wants to marry me, she wants to have babies, etc.. I appreciate all the kind words but everytime she says it, she expects me to say it in return. She is wearing me out over this ****. Right now she is crying her ass off because we had another discussion about how I need to express how much I appreciate her on a daily basis because she needs to know it from me. I left her apt. last night because she wasacting like a freak again with all this ****. I told her that i was not like that and I really dont say that **** all the time.
The thing is, it is not god enough for her. She wants me to say it everyday so it can reassure her of my feelings. She wrote me this email this morning and gave me the option of calling her at noon if I wanted to and if i didnt want to it would be no big deal. Well i having been installing a oudoor ceiling fan today and running wire and I didnt have time to. She called at noon and asked why i did not call and I told her I though it was a option. Next things you know she is turing the situation around into "I dont care about her bull****!!"
I am fuking tired of this sheet!! i dont drink, I dont cheat on her, i take her out when I can, and I do tell her how much i care but this girl is a fooking basketcase right now. i dont understand why i have to say **** every day to reassure her of how I feel. She told me she has low self esteme and that why she needs reassurance but damm it! Do I look like Dr. Phil for fuks sake!
Should I bounce or what? I feel I need to bounce and just take care of my own ****. I shouldn't have to worry about her all them time when I have **** of my own to worry about.
abstrack@protonmail.com
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02-11-2004, 03:49 PM #2
LAME. If you need to ask other people for advice and even a decision on a situation we have no information on other than a paragraph of typed words then you have serious problems not in relation to the relationship.
Should you bounce or not??? Our opinion will help you decide or are you just trying to go with the consensis of the group to help assure you that you made the right decision based on majority?
Do what needs to be done. If you are tired of her then stop being around her.
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02-11-2004, 03:53 PM #3
Oh come on bro...Even I KNOW what to do on this decision....
the bottom line, is she's extremely insecure. Enough said.
--Hoss
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02-11-2004, 04:36 PM #4Originally Posted by bermich
Never mind in replying to this thread since i have already taken up some of your precious time.abstrack@protonmail.com
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02-11-2004, 04:42 PM #5
Dunno if this will help, but you have to do what is best for you. If you aren't happy then you aren't happy. If she's such a great girl and it's worth it to you, then work it out and compromise. The good ones are few in far between. And all women act a little nuts from time to time and sometimes want more attention...there are no exceptions. Bottom line::::do what makes you happy at the end of the day.....
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02-11-2004, 04:43 PM #6Originally Posted by hoss827abstrack@protonmail.com
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02-11-2004, 04:44 PM #7
Dude............
After you have sex with her... and she with you do you say "that was Great" or does she say.. "Wow... you're the best"
My point is "I love you" is the same to her... it makes her feel important to you
My wife and her whole family are the same way you are... I get in thier face and say "I love you" especially when we talk on the phone, or before we leave...
I had to explain this to my wife.. She tells me how gorgeous i am every single day... it hasn't become less important just because she says it all the time.. nor does it become less important that we say i love you... alot...
i am making the assumption you love her......The answer to your every question
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02-11-2004, 04:45 PM #8
PS...
By not telling her you love her.... it is telling her she isn't good enough.. she isn't loved........
sorry....... but that is what you are doing........
end it or say "I love you"The answer to your every question
Rules
A bigot is a person obstinately or intolerantly devoted
to his or her own opinions and prejudices, especially
one exhibiting intolerance, and animosity toward those of differing beliefs.
If you get scammed by an UGL listed on this board or by another member here, it's all part of the game and learning experience for you,
we do not approve nor support any sources that may be listed on this site.
I will not do source checks for you, the peer review from other members should be enough to help you make a decision on your quest. Buyer beware.
Don't Let the Police kick your ass
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02-11-2004, 04:54 PM #9
spywizard nailed it.....
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02-11-2004, 05:03 PM #10ttuPrincess Guest
Would you like a girls opinion????? well your gonna get it anyways...to break it down easily.. girls are different from boys.. we need to hear I LOVE YOU... if youre not comfortable with saying it that many times a day she needs to know that, but she also needs to be accepting of the fact that you dont like to say it....
you say shes a great girl and all, then you need to show her that, and it doesnt only have to be done by saying I LOVE YOU.. there are many little ways of showing her, email her in the middle of the day saying it, or text message her telling her you had a great time (insert activity here) last night, or that you cant wait to see her tonight..
if its saying the words that freaks you out, make up your own way of saying it.. For example, my boyfriend doesnt say I LOVE YOU infront of his friends, which is no big deal, if I say it when they are around he just says "DITTO" (Yes, copied from GHOST if any of yall caught that)
Bottom line is.. yall need to communicate.. if you talk it out and this is something she needs that you cant give her let her go, it'll be best for both of ya'll, but if it's something you feel can be worked out and comprimised, then go for it.
GOOD LUCK!!!!
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02-11-2004, 05:24 PM #11
i think spy and princess hit it right on the money
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02-11-2004, 05:40 PM #12
Abstrack,
You have been on the board for a while now and I don't buy this for a minute. You don't break up with a great girl over something like this so what is the real problem. If I had to guess you feel like your being pressured into marriage or a more serious situation than you want and this is just the excuse you are using to get out. You better think about hard if this is her only fault.
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02-11-2004, 05:58 PM #13Originally Posted by abstrack
--Hoss
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02-11-2004, 06:02 PM #14ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by hoss827
First of all every girl sees herself differently then others do...... and most girls do need to be reassured that they are loved... both of those things are just in how most girls are raised in this society...
Now boys play nice....
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02-11-2004, 06:04 PM #15Originally Posted by ttuPrincess
--Hoss
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02-11-2004, 06:08 PM #16Originally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:08 PM #17ttuPrincess Guest
Not taking sides, or meaning to sound like a mom, but maybe Hoss, you cuold have given your opinion in a nicer way, or have elaborated on it.... take sometime to think about what your gonna say and how it may effect that person once you do say it is all I'm trying to...????? SAY????? hum that doesnt sound right either but whatever
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02-11-2004, 06:11 PM #18Originally Posted by anadrol devourer
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02-11-2004, 06:12 PM #19Originally Posted by ttuPrincess
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02-11-2004, 06:14 PM #20Originally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:15 PM #21Originally Posted by anadrol devourer
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02-11-2004, 06:18 PM #22ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by hoss827
And I do recall you getting a bit upset when people didnt respond exactly how you wanted then to either...
Really sounding like a Mom here... but... and not just to you Hoss, when someone asks for advice.... if you dont have something nice to say, or atleast elaborate on why you feel that way, dont say anything at all.... if you think their screwing up their lives let them... it wont hurt you in the least bit
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02-11-2004, 06:20 PM #23
Some good points here abstrack . . . if all you have to do to make her happy is to tell her that you love her once a day - well, I wish that was my biggest problem. If you do love her, tell her so. Like tt said, they need to hear it or have it demonstrated to them often. It took me a while to get this myself. I made a point to tell my wife this everyday, and now its second nature . . . and we almost never have this conversation anymore.
On the other hand, perhaps Rickson is correct. Maybe its more than that? I remember questioning whether I really wanted to commit to somone forever. It is a scary proposition, even for those who end up perfectly happy. If you feel like she is getting ahead of herself (and you) by talking about marriage and babies, maybe you two should have a talk. Be direct. Be honest. If she is as great as you say she is, she will be sensitive to your feelings and maybe hold off on the baby talk for a while. Just emphasize that you are not rejecting her, especially if she has insecurity issues.
In the end, you still really like dating her (possibly love her?), and you have plenty of time to see where you two can go from there. Take it easy, but you need to communicate to her those things that make you uncomfortable, because if you do not she will assume otherwise.
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02-11-2004, 06:21 PM #24Originally Posted by abstrack
not cool man
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02-11-2004, 06:21 PM #25Originally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:22 PM #26
If i made that comment sound the wrong way, I apologize.. I meant that he should eiether say the words"Il ove you." if you truly care for her, or leave her if shes that insecure.
--Hoss
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02-11-2004, 06:24 PM #27Originally Posted by hoss827
Last edited by anadrol devourer; 02-11-2004 at 06:30 PM.
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02-11-2004, 06:26 PM #28ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:26 PM #29
I didn't apologize, I just stated my comment more clearly. He can still go to hell.
--Hoss
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02-11-2004, 06:26 PM #30
this whole thing by abstrak just seems like a whole 'attention/let me post something diferent' deal. who is gonna really base such a desicion on what is said here??? i know someone said something along these lines, and i just wanted to second it.
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02-11-2004, 06:29 PM #31Originally Posted by QbHunter
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02-11-2004, 06:30 PM #32Originally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:31 PM #33ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:32 PM #34Originally Posted by ttuPrincess
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02-11-2004, 06:32 PM #35Originally Posted by anadrol devourer
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02-11-2004, 06:33 PM #36Originally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:34 PM #37
Honey-nutted bunny bangers,....thats all i got to say...
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02-11-2004, 06:35 PM #38Originally Posted by anadrol devourer
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02-11-2004, 06:35 PM #39ttuPrincess GuestOriginally Posted by hoss827
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02-11-2004, 06:35 PM #40Originally Posted by anadrol devourer
hey, understand that he is young, and his mind and body are going through a transitional stage.....His body is changing and... just kidding hossy
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