Pleasing your woman and lasting longer

**Keyser Sozey** · 07-17-2005, 04:04 PM

I thought I'd put my .02cents on this topic. Gentlemen, many of you probably know this routine, but to those that don't and have problems lasting longer, or pleasing your lady, here are some tips from KEYSER SOZEY!
First, if your going out w/ a lady (even if you are not going to have sex) rub one off before you leave the house, especially if your pipes have not been drained for a few days. The closer to leaving the better.
Second, if things become intimate, always go downtown and take your time, make her orgasm. PLEASE YOUR WOMAN. VERY IMPORTANT! I usually get excited when making the cappucino, so while you're down there, rub another one off (if you're doing a good job she will never know

).
CAUTION! Beware of the dead racoon. If you don't know the lady you are with too well and it smells like something died down there, your face probably should not be there either. It's your call.
Third, when engaging in intercourse, try and keep your mind somewhere else. I recite songs, think about sports, whatever, just keep the rod pumpin'. Since you have your pipes clear, this whole mental thing becomes much easier.
Fourth, change positions. This is why we watch porno. Learn some new moves, the piledriver, etc.
Fifth, practice Kegel exercises. With a stronger sphincter, clean pipes and a good mental block, you'll go longer than ever.
Feel free to add anything, in order to help me and others reading
Thanks
<Keyser>
Btw, the purpose of this is to avoid using cialis, viagra, etc. (except when on pct, of course)

**lucabratzi** · 07-17-2005, 04:21 PM

a tip for if u shoot to quick, quickly clean then stick it back in and keep goin. one of my freinds told me this, so i ask what if i go limp. he said just think of how good the pussy feels, and keep pounding. so thats what i do now. just my .02

**305GUY** · 07-17-2005, 04:27 PM

[QUOTE=Keyser Sozey]First, if your going out w/ a lady (even if you are not going to have sex) rub one off before you leave the house, especially if your pipes have not been drained for a few days. The closer to leaving the better.
Second, if things become intimate, always go downtown and take your time, make her orgasm. PLEASE YOUR WOMAN. VERY IMPORTANT! I usually get excited when making the cappucino, so while you're down there, rub another one off (if you're doing a good job she will never know ).
Third, when engaging in intercourse, try and keep your mind somewhere else. I recite songs, think about sports, whatever, just keep the rod pumpin'. Since you have your pipes clear, this whole mental thing becomes much easier.

You must bust nutz like theres no freaking tommorrow bro... i just save it for one big load all over that ass....

**stocky121** · 07-17-2005, 04:27 PM

**** it i ain't going to lie i just take viagra it work's for me

**Keyser Sozey** · 07-17-2005, 04:33 PM

Originally Posted by 305GUY

You must bust nutz like theres no freaking tommorrow bro... i just save it for one big load all over that ass....

LMFAO

**abstrack** · 07-17-2005, 04:42 PM

sounds like a workout to me

**Keyser Sozey** · 07-17-2005, 04:50 PM

Originally Posted by abstrack

sounds like a workout to me

It is

, but it works.
<Keyser>

**SprinterOne** · 07-17-2005, 05:36 PM

One question, how the hell do you rub one out while you are down on your lady. I mean, you just rub it out all over the floor or what the ****? Do you already have a rubber on? I mean, seriously, how can you do this without leaving the evidence all over the place?

I do agree with you on going down on her (assuming she isn't dirty). If you can get her to orgasm a few times she won't care if the sex doesn't last forever. Also, the changing position trick is a good one. Buys you a little time to allow the excitement to die down.

**Keyser Sozey** · 07-17-2005, 05:56 PM

Originally Posted by SprinterOne

One question, how the hell do you rub one out while you are down on your lady. I mean, you just rub it out all over the floor or what the ****? Do you already have a rubber on? I mean, seriously, how can you do this without leaving the evidence all over the place?

Sprinterone, the load goes where it goes

(hopefully, on the bed cover). The trick is one hand pulling up the hood and the other one, massaging your boy. I have yet to have an investigation for that. No rubber until the actual sex.
Even w/ her having three orgasms, the "general" still has to do his work and if you're that loose already, there is no way you'll shoot your load prematurely. Go for the fourth orgasm. Pound that tang!
<Keyser>

**Tazwell** · 07-17-2005, 06:47 PM

just drink a couple whiskeys you'll last for a while..

**Keyser Sozey** · 07-17-2005, 06:53 PM

Originally Posted by Tazwell

just drink a couple whiskeys you'll last for a while..

Crown and diet Pepsi

**Jerzey** · 07-17-2005, 06:54 PM

What happens if the woman keeps your mind on her, you can't tell me you never had one that kept your head focused

I have a lot of other questions on this post, but most importantly, I'd like to know what happens in the above referenced situation....

**Keyser Sozey** · 07-17-2005, 07:13 PM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

What happens if the woman keeps your mind on her, you can't tell me you never had one that kept your head focused

I have a lot of other questions on this post, but most importantly, I'd like to know what happens in the above referenced situation....

Good question. This is why the above stated preperations are made. It gets a little hectic when you have a power house w you in bed. This is when strategies really kick in. For example, I've had a girl that was talking to me crazy style and just overall fvcking my brains out. So I asked for a quick bathroom break and I put toilet paper in my ears (she could not tell, I have long hair) and when i came outside, I turned the radio up. This controlled what I heard. Then I took the lights out, so I wouldn't see her as well. After that I flipped her over (doggie style) and regained composure there, b/c I was not facing her, could not hear her, and was able to sing the song in my head (I believe it was " a ferarri a jaguar, switching four lanes w the top pulled down screaming money ain't a thing"

). However, I've known a few girls who just lay there & that is no problem, it makes it even easier to control yourself & I don't mind doing all the work.

**SwoleCat** · 07-17-2005, 07:19 PM

I just tell her, "If you don't come when I come, you come when I come back".

~SC~

**305GUY** · 07-17-2005, 07:31 PM

Originally Posted by Keyser Sozey

Good question. For example, I've had a girl that was talking to me crazy style and just overall fvcking my brains out. So I asked for a quick bathroom break and I put toilet paper in my ears (she could not tell, I have long hair) and when i came outside, I turned the radio up.

I've never heard anything like that before in my life... Why would you go through so much trouble to hold back a nut. Just let it rip man...

**Jerzey** · 07-17-2005, 07:33 PM

Originally Posted by Keyser Sozey

Good question. This is why the above stated preperations are made. It gets a little hectic when you have a power house w you in bed. This is when strategies really kick in. For example, I've had a girl that was talking to me crazy style and just overall fvcking my brains out. So I asked for a quick bathroom break and I put toilet paper in my ears (she could not tell, I have long hair) and when i came outside, I turned the radio up. This controlled what I heard. Then I took the lights out, so I wouldn't see her as well. After that I flipped her over (doggie style) and regained composure there, b/c I was not facing her, could not hear her, and was able to sing the song in my head (I believe it was " a ferarri a jaguar, switching four lanes w the top pulled down screaming money ain't a thing"

). However, I've known a few girls who just lay there & that is no problem, it makes it even easier to control yourself & I don't mind doing all the work.

I'm not quite sure what to say here....

SC - LMAO

***BIG TEXAN*** · 07-17-2005, 07:33 PM

Originally Posted by SwoleCat

I just tell her, "If you don't come when I come, you come when I come back".

~SC~

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! !! I have a sex drive like no other, I had found a woman that wanted it as much as I did and was in heaven. Since her surgeries she can't last that long and her desire has diminished some so now I have to act quick or she begins to hurt..... the sad thing is she never needed the surgery and there's no fixing it.

**Jerzey** · 07-17-2005, 07:35 PM

Originally Posted by 305GUY

I've never heard anything like that before in my life... Why would you go through so much trouble to hold back a nut. Just let it rip man...

That's more along the lines of how i was thinking and I'm not a guy!!

**Jerzey** · 07-17-2005, 07:36 PM

Originally Posted by BIG TEXAN

the sad thing is she never needed the surgery and there's no fixing it.

That's terrible

**305GUY** · 07-17-2005, 07:36 PM

Originally Posted by SwoleCat

I just tell her, "If you don't come when I come, you come when I come back".

~SC~

Spoken like a REAL MAN...

***BIG TEXAN*** · 07-17-2005, 07:38 PM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

That's terrible

Yep..... I feel bad cause the doctor that did it said it was and I did my part to persuade her thinking it was going to help her. We've talked to lawyers but there's nothing that can be done. He messed her life up and is gettign away with it.

**Jerzey** · 07-17-2005, 08:01 PM

Originally Posted by BIG TEXAN

Yep..... I feel bad cause the doctor that did it said it was and I did my part to persuade her thinking it was going to help her. We've talked to lawyers but there's nothing that can be done. He messed her life up and is gettign away with it.

If the dr. or the surgery he suggested messed up her life (speaking from working in the legal field) I wouldn't see "a" lawyer, I'd see a medical malpractice attorney or two...

www.martindale.com

search by your location. PM me if you have any ques.

**Keyser Sozey** · 07-17-2005, 08:49 PM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

I'm not quite sure what to say here....

To be honest, I am more interested in my partner's pleasure than mine.
Also, if a guy has not had any sex, masturbation,etc., for a few days and engages in intercourse (especially, if a girl has his head in the game, like you say), He will not last more than 15 minutes. Now, what I listed above has worked for me. Is it extreme to put tp in my ears, maybe, but when your nailin a hottie (or when the hottie is riding you) it becomes a point to perform.
Guess it's an ego thing too.

**SwoleCat** · 07-17-2005, 09:43 PM

I've never had a problem w/a female gettin' off within' 5-10 minutes actually!

It's the dumb ones who don't know wtf they are doing that could go for hours, get all dry and shit, and never nut themselves.

To them I say, "Oh well, tough shit"

~SC~

**1819** · 07-17-2005, 09:45 PM

Originally Posted by Tazwell

just drink a couple whiskeys you'll last for a while..

taz, im with ya on that one. my failsafe though...black garbage men. think about a couple of big african-american dudes, in the rubber aprons, with the rubber gloves on, slingin dented cans into the back of a truck, in the alley, in 95 degree heat, with the smell and the rotten lettuce and stuff hangin out of the cans. you guys may laugh now but i guarantee, the next time you're with a chick, this will cross your mind and you'll go like a champ.

**ttuprincess** · 07-18-2005, 07:20 AM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

What happens if the woman keeps your mind on her, you can't tell me you never had one that kept your head focused

I have a lot of other questions on this post, but most importantly, I'd like to know what happens in the above referenced situation....

i like this question

**Property of Steroid.com** · 07-18-2005, 07:50 AM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

What happens if the woman keeps your mind on her, you can't tell me you never had one that kept your head focused

Is that what you usually do? Keep the guy focused?

**Jerzey** · 07-18-2005, 08:20 AM

Originally Posted by hooker

Is that what you usually do? Keep the guy focused?

I will keep his attention, one way or another.... yes. I have as much fun pleasing as I do being pleased so...I like making him lose control

Although... there have been times where my "head" was into it and that's usually where I lose control...I have lost control myself on really good occasions... thank god for multiple orgams....

**SwoleCat** · 07-18-2005, 09:22 AM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

I have as much fun pleasing as I do being pleased so.

You sound exactly like my "sancha" from years ago.

She was fascinated with seeing me "get off".........it was the WEIRDEST THING!!!! She said she used to love to make such a big guy "crumble" in her hands. Whether it was strokin' me off, blowin' me, etc., whatever it took she would do.............daily!

H*ll, u never saw me complaining!

~SC~

**clockworks** · 07-18-2005, 09:30 AM

Originally Posted by Tazwell

just drink a couple whiskeys you'll last for a while..

Booya, works every time.

**Jerzey** · 07-18-2005, 09:33 AM

Originally Posted by SwoleCat

She was fascinated with seeing me "get off".........it was the WEIRDEST THING!!!! She said she used to love to make such a big guy "crumble" in her hands. Whether it was strokin' me off, blowin' me, etc., whatever it took she would do.............daily!

Precisely what I meant

(the whole thing, I just bolded the actual "intent" part)....

**clockworks** · 07-18-2005, 09:36 AM

OK, here are my tricks:

1) Get drunk.
2) If you're about to nut, pull out and either a) change positions, b) have her suck on your nuts for a bit (this only works if its your gf...or just a freaky chick).

**H BOMB** · 07-18-2005, 09:42 AM

i agree let it rip let it be natural. if it is that good you will still be hard clean up and round 2.

**SwoleCat** · 07-18-2005, 09:59 AM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

Precisely what I meant

(the whole thing, I just bolded the actual "intent" part)....

Well, since you like to do this so much, and I love it of course, maybe we should....................

~SC~

**Jerzey** · 07-18-2005, 09:59 AM

Originally Posted by H BOMB

i agree let it rip let it be natural. if it is that good you will still be hard clean up and round 2.

H - you have such a way with words

**SwoleCat** · 07-18-2005, 10:00 AM

Originally Posted by H BOMB

i agree let it rip let it be natural.

No woman I know wants you farting in the sack!

~SC~

**Property of Steroid.com** · 07-18-2005, 10:05 AM

Originally Posted by Jerzey

Precisely what I meant ..

I don't know about "crumble"....thats a strong word....

Do you have that effect on guys....normally? I mean....

**SwoleCat** · 07-18-2005, 10:13 AM

Trust me Hooker, I would crumble! This woman was so freakin' sexy, so nasty, so HOT, the way she kissed me up/down, whispered in my ear, made these noises, etc. I am also America's Most Sluttiest Male, so it was like I was on X all the time (never used that actually but I hear stories so I relate my hornyness/nastyness to that). So, when eruption time came, I whimpered and yelled like a little bitch, lol, and you could hear that shit all through the underground parking garage by the beach.

Oooops, there goes my undercover spot!

~SC~

**SwoleCat** · 07-18-2005, 10:14 AM

A lot of our relationship was mental as well as physical (we never planned that, but when cheating you never "really" do) , which is why at the end it turned into "A thin line between love and hate".

Not sure how many of you saw that movie, but just call me Martin Lawrence!

~SC~

**Jerzey** · 07-18-2005, 10:27 AM

Originally Posted by hooker

I don't know about "crumble"....thats a strong word....

Do you have that effect on guys....normally? I mean....

You'd have to ask a guy I've been with... I mean, I know what I've been told but I can't say for sure.

See, I'm only that way when I'm really into a guy, if not, I'd rather take care of biz myself

I can't just hook-up, I lose interest fast if I'm not into him.

SC - I think when it's mental and physical is when it is best

I know I'm very different with someone that I have a connection with, then someone I really don't, but am almost trying to or whatever.. I wouldn't care if he got off or not, unless I wanted him to get off.. hard to explain but I think you know exactly what I was referring to. Sure sounds like it!

I like how you call yourself America's Most Sluttiest Male, LMAO