Anna....what are your stats?
Major lifts etc?
Thanks
Anna....what are your stats?
Major lifts etc?
Thanks
I squat 6 plates for reps. Curl 55 and do good mornings with 4 plates. I can do a short set barbell BP at 6 plates no prob but usually work lighter, with better form, typically around 265. In fact I have been moving away from the bar and doing more dumbbell work lately. I saw a post somewhere about dumbbell-only training and thought I would try it for a while, and I sort of like it. It has done wonders for my forearms. You would think that hitting your forearms so much so often would overtrain them, but I got noticeable growth there in the just the first month and a half of dumbbell training. Maybe there are more slow twitch fibers in forearms than elsewhere in the upper body, or of course you can blame it on fast recovery from being on the juice.Originally Posted by Narkissos
I have never been a powerlifter. I don't care about how much I can lift as much as how much muscle I carry. So I have never trained in powerlifting style and never done a max single.
As for height/weight/bodyfat let's just say I am a big girl. No cuts or veins, some excess lard to be sure, but if my bodyfat goes too low, poof... there go my breasts. Most of them, anyway.
Love
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
(Juiiced Shemale Rescue Hooker)
Damn, bigger than me
ok, enough with the seriousness lol
any chance of some pics?
is that you bdtr
Wow, I don't really know what to say... .I haven't even put on make-up in over a monthOh well, that's just me..
More power to you AB!
Last edited by Jerzey; 09-10-2005 at 03:33 PM.
No shit right? Thought I was the only oneOriginally Posted by stompin
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So anna... I have a question I dont think has been asked..... Why did you make the transformation?
i agree...Originally Posted by Anna Bollick
this is an interesting question when did you decide to make transformation and how did it come about??
Oh, Girl, I absolutely have to put on my face before going out or having visitors. My facial hair is too dark and thick. Estrogen tends to make facial hair finer and softer, and tighten up the skin texture, but I also use so much test that I really don't get that effect quite like I would otherwise. There are products especially for my situation, with the shadow and all, but I find the only thing that works for me is to stipple an orangey shade, leaning toward yellow, of lipstick and blending it in over the beard area, then applying my foundation over that. The yellow iin the orange lipstick is opposite the blue (yes, blue, actually, believe it or not) color of beard shadow and so it neutralizes it, but it in turn must be concealed, so a heavy foundation and powder are necessary. I can't just smear on a light application of watery runny covergirl foundation... I have to use Max Factor Panstick or similar. Well if you go to all that trouble to make a blank slate of your face, you have to get serious with blush and eyes and lips as well or you look like a ghost. Also artful use of blush can de-masculinize my face by de-emphasizing my chin and jawline. The avatar is actually a picture of me, from a couple years ago, though I have changed my look a bit since then. So I have problems that you don't have to worry about. It would be nice to be able to just smear on a bit of lipstick and go out and meet the world, but no can do. I know a sweet little young TS who can do that, but she started on hormones when she was 16, and she is a natural ice-blonde with great skin so no need to get so serious about covering up. The younger you are when you start, the better. I was already in my 30's when I started using female hormones, and it has been a battle to be sure. Anyway, my makeup routine is quick and efficient and unchanging. One look for day, another for night. For night I just highlight with an off-white opaque powder, apply a bit more blush in more of a plum color, and touch up the eyes a bit if my face is already made up for daytime. The lipstick trick ensures that my beard does not show badly for about 18 hours or so, even though it can be felt. Some day I will be able to afford laser treatment, which works well on dark hair, but for now I am too close to living hand to mouth and have hardly anything saved. So putting on my face in the morning is just as natural as peeing for me. I don't even think about it.Originally Posted by Jerzey
Love
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
You mean "transition", I think. I think I had an idea all along, even from childhood, that I was not like other boys. I preferred playing with the girls. Their games made more sense to me. I had to be badgered by my Dad to get involved with sports and some other masculine pursuits. I sort of pushed all that into the back of my head as I grew up and got tired of having to fight every day, and I suppose I overcompensated to avoid the "fag" stigma, though in truth I never was attracted to other boys. Some of my behavior and ways of thinking betrayed my feminine nature and I learned to suppress all that for a long time.Originally Posted by collar
I was in the military briefly (don't ask) and did the marriage thing twice. By the time I was 30, though, I was a mess, mentally. I was depressed, suicidal, violent at times, prone to drug and booze binges, and had trouble with relationships. Finally I got some help from a shrink who suggested, without me fessing up about my childhood issues, that I might have Gender Dysphoria. I thought if it is that obvious, maybe it is right on the money. I then began to reveal more of my past and as a consequence of talking about it, began to understand a lot about myself and see almost from a third person perspective how I had suppressed my true nature in order to survive and fit in. I also saw how it wasn't working, since I periodically thought about ending the survival and I never really did fit in, except with some female friends who did not expect me to be hyper-macho all the time.
I suppose I then went deeply into denial and found some relief with heavy cycles of test. I had always lifted, from adolescence, and this seemed a natural extension. The test helped. Of course I grew, and the improvements bouyed my self esteem quite a bit, and meant that I didn't have to fight as much. My thought patterns and behavior changed, too, and I was almost "one of the guys". Then to make a long story short I just reached the end of my chain one day and tried seriously to off myself and my best friend at the time, who had known me from Jr high school, had a long talk with me. She had reached the same conclusion as the shrink who diagnosed me with Gender Dysphoria years earlier.
That did it. I got some help from her with clothes and makeup and hair, and began going out en femme, first only at night on weekends to gay or trans bars where I felt I would not be a freak, and then more often, to regular straight venues. I mostly kept my male life and my female life separate. I began counseling again, with a specialist in gender issues, and got in the pipeline. At this time I was bouncing, stripping, doing security and doorman gigs, bartending, and training a few clients. I began living full time as a woman and saw my sources of income largely dry up, mostly because I did not have the confidence to carry on as before with my new gender presentation. This was a difficult time for me. I nearly left the City to find some place where nobody knew me as a man.
Finally I got the okay to start on a trial regimen of Premarin. After a week, I felt much more adjusted. At the end of two weeks, I began seeing the first signs of breast growth. I looked back at all the times my estrogen had been high and realized that much of the relief I found in high dose test cycles was from the aromatization. I tried Estynil and a few other orals, and then A friendly queen who had taken me under her wing gave me a half full vial of Delestrogen brand Estradiol Valerate. Girlfriend, that was magic. I went overboard though, buying online and using really big doses with no medical supervision, and found myself getting bitchy, moody and depressed again. I took more and more, figuring that a little made me feel good, so I need to keep increasing my dose until I feel great. Finally a friend told me what I was doing wrong. I had a psychological addiction and it took a while to get it straight in my head that too much of this good thing was not a good thing. This seems to be common.
I fessed up to my endo and he and I sat down and worked out a dosing schedule, and he took me off the orals and put me on injectables. By this time he had made it clear that he knew (it was obvious, from the blood work) that I was using steroids, and that this was outside his experience and that there might be many adjustments necessary. I stuck it out and got my act together.
Meanwhile it had gotten harder and harder for me to keep trying to work the clubs and stuff, and almost all of my clients had found properly masculine trainers, and out of desperation I turned to prostitution, as probably 90% of all TS do at one time or another. I had experimented with sex with men in my younger days but it felt strange and unnatural. Now it didn't feel that way. I realized that I WAS a woman, and there was nothing wrong with a woman having sex with a man. On the other hand, I still enjoyed sex with women, and in fact enjoyed it even more because now I knew I was not going to get a big romance thing going and then screw it up.
Anyway the whoring wasn't so bad, and I learned how to take care of myself in a whole new world. I made my adjustments and got on with my life. I kept up the visits and switched shrinks to get the necessary two recommendations for SRS (Sexual Reassignment Surgery) and lacked only the funds for surgery. I went through another self doubting period, doubting that I would be able to make it as a female. I felt that without my tricking income, I would not be able to keep my head above water, and that without my boy parts, I would not be able to keep that source of income going. Plus I simply did not have the money. So I sort of stagnated and ended up being sort of a Mother Hen to a lot of the younger girls on the street, helped keep the pimps and dirty cops out of our hair, stuff like that. When there was trouble I was the one they ran to, because I didn't mind beating up bozos and I was fairly good at it. I never went to jail for prostitution thought there were some close calls. I did see some jail time for assault etc, though. Not very femme, huh?
Now I guess I am comfortable with myself and my life. I don't pass well, of course, so I often find myself doing just the opposite, scaring or shocking tourists, lapsing into masculine behavior, etc. Of course the test I use tends to make that easier and more natural, and doesn't interfere with breast growth at all. I can make a decent living, and I am not afraid to take a regular job. Some day maybe I will find Mr Right who will buy me a pussy, bot most men who are attracted to me are attracted to me as I am, and are of course not going to pay for me to become something else that they do not want. I buy my powerball tickets faithfully, and some day I will win and pay for my SRS myself. The few well-to-do relatives I have pretty much turned against me and so I can forget about an inheritance windfall. I can't safe enough money for surgery. So I am in static mode, not progressing, not regressing, just running in place while the years go by. It might seem like a miserable existence, but I truthfully am happier now than I have ever been.
Okay, no more personal questions. You got half my life story already!
Love
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
anna...
i dont know what to say ..
i appreciate you telling us bit more about yourself...
that really does take courage ....
from reading this you have had some ups and downs... ofcourse i can never know how it really feels to be in your situation....
but i can see at time you would have doubted yourself and so on...
and its sad to see that your family and relatives seem to have gone their own way....
this is said to hear.
"The few well-to-do relatives I have pretty much turned against me"
thank you for that and it is really appreciated...
I have to say that this has been the single most interesting thread I've read on this board (well, at least the lounge threads anyway)
Human psychology and sociology are fascinating subjects, and Anna (whether she likes it or not) has been an excellent diplomat representing a segment of society that has always suffered from a lack understanding (or lack of willingness to understand). Thank you.
I had my doubts Dally, but good call!
amen..
for some reason its just think this is great in many ways dont know why..
this thread im talking bout..
one more serious one i was just wondering about ur body stat's because u seem pretty real about what ur into and also whats a cycle look like for u .
seriously interesting anna, glad you made it through!!
so you have super high test levels+super high estogen levels? That must be incredibly anabolic! see...most bb's care about there estr getting to high...but thats no issue with you. Therefore, you could be the biggest bodybuilder in the world if you wanted too!
Any Chances of you putting up a thread in the member's pics forum Ana?
Holla
I can't believe I just wasted 5 minutes reading through everyone of these posts...............................Make note to self: stay out of Lounge area......
LOL! It would still take a level of dedication and genetic potential and financial resources that I simply do not posess. I am 6" in stocking feet and was 265 last time I weighed myself. I like to flatter myself by telling myself that I only have 20% bodyfat because reality sucks sometimes. I tend to hold a lot of water, too. As actual lean mass goes, there are plenty of men on this board who have me beat. I try, but junk food and liquor are my weaknesses, and sometimes I don't get the rest I need. There... is everybody happy? Yes, the est and test together do magic things to bodyweight and also for muscle growth, and I welcome all I can get of both. BTW both bodyweight and bodyfat are probably up now. I can barely get into a favorite skirt of mine that was just pleasingly snug, and forget about my jeans. I just can't pack myself into them anymore. must cut... must cut... must cut...Originally Posted by AnabolicBoy1981
Okay, that was the LAST serious answer I will give to any request for personal info, stats, stuff like that. </seriousmode> <outrageousmode><OTT>
kisses and tickles
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
265lb she-male, thats something you won't see everyday.
Yes, our minds (not like most) tend to enjoy one another's company. Those outside of the pack will doubtless be disinterested, but you have your own herd. Enjoy it.Originally Posted by mark956101957
Anyway Anna, how is New Orleans doing these days? My hat's off to those that have chosen to stick it out, but seriously, how is it? How is your neighborhood doing? I have only spent a small amount of time in NO, but I know that The Quarter will be sorely missed.
Honestly, as a seafood lover, NO is off the charts as far as whole cities go. And The Quarter is off the charts as far as alcohol lovers go. In the end, I had my aura read, had a spirit reading done and bought a 10" dildo all on the same street. I will miss it! And that is why I'm sure that it will be back! NO is unlike any city in the US!
Anna, you and yours make it that way! The eccentricities of that city will ensure its return, in my opinion.
Are you a dude?
First off Ms.Anna....I must say that I am pretty damn impressed with your spelling and grammar....only two mistakes I saw through all of those posts....amazing.![]()
Secondly....waiting for the powerball may be some timeBut, I think you may have already won though....your mind is the winning ticket. You obviously have a way with words, a very sensitively descriptive way that I think you can use to your advantage. A well written book or directed story like yours is very sellable in todays market, movie if not reality tv. Of course the presentation would be key, but if it was presented correctly, i'm sure it would really be a hit.
I don't think there is anything I can say that hasn't been said already.....except that I sense alot of sadness and pain in your story. We all have our moments and bad days seem to last forever sometimes don't they, however I hope they don't get the better of you, cause I'm sure sometimes they have been quite challenging. They are of course to be expected as I am sure you know, but I think it's more important to recognize and applaude your ongoing positive attitude ... good for you and keep it up!
From the resident pig of all pigs....the mind is a terrible thing to waste and I glad yours wasn't....ya big ol shemale rescue hooker you!![]()
Is this what test. does to a 'normal' woman?? :jw:
Let's try some.. how bout that![]()
Originally Posted by PaRiS2005
I have lurked on some of the other forums but this is the only place I stick my head up out of the lurkey shadows. The other forums are just too serious. This forum entertains me and provides an outlet. I can't be outrageus on the street right now, so I spend a lot of time here lately.Originally Posted by bigJJ
Some electricity has evidently been restored to the City, Uptown and in the CBD. The water is going down and each estimate of time to completion gets a little better, it seems. My fireman friend finally got tired of me badgering him when he really wanted me to be buggering him on the few occasions he was able to come home, and he told me that he gave my address to a colleague in the City to check out and it was okay. Rampart did get some flooding but now only has water for a couple of blocks. My condo is on the second floor so I didn't get any water at all. When I left, there was water from St Louis Street to Canal and at its worst I think there were about two feet of water in the street at my address. I suffered a small amount of wind and rain damage in one room and my friend who was with me through the storm did a lot to put it to right. The windows are reglazed and the drywall repaired just not painted yet. That is only one room. The rest is fine. Some of the Rampart street businesses, many of the Canal Street, Bourbon Street, and Decatur Street businesses were looted. Initial reports were that they were looting houses there, too, but now I don't believe many homes in the Quarter were hit.Anyway Anna, how is New Orleans doing these days? My hat's off to those that have chosen to stick it out, but seriously, how is it? How is your neighborhood doing? I have only spent a small amount of time in NO, but I know that The Quarter will be sorely missed.
All in all it was not a total catastrophe. Well, tell that to the poor folks from the 9th ward and NO East. The businesses in the CBD will probably open first, followed by the Quarter, and soon after some businesses and the basic services are widely open and available, I'm sure they will begin letting residents back in.
10"? Darling, you are a courageous young man! Or an adventurous one!Honestly, as a seafood lover, NO is off the charts as far as whole cities go. And The Quarter is off the charts as far as alcohol lovers go. In the end, I had my aura read, had a spirit reading done and bought a 10" dildo all on the same street. I will miss it! And that is why I'm sure that it will be back! NO is unlike any city in the US!
Yes, Girlfriend, I love the panoply of life in the Quarter. I never get tired of watching the same old street performers or the ever-changing crowd watching them. I love being right in the middle of the freakshow, and I love being able to walk about without a gun in my purse at night. I love the restaurants, Girl! Food is my weakness. If I was not lifting, I would be such a whale! Or hippo, or something. I love Pierre Maspero's and Antoine's, and rubbing elbows with the rich and powerful at Galatoire's. (I do have to behave myself in there... pity!)
Thank you, Dear. I just wish more tourists had your attitude. Many young men come down here and not only gawk at the freaks but make fun of them. I say if you can't handle the freaks, don't come to the show. Stay the hell home. Yes, our city is unique. No other place quite like it in the world. The Quarter survived well. Much of uptown fared well. Rebuilding is quite do-able and Nawlins is not a victim, just a patient. She is ailing but recovering quickly. And Girlfriend, I am so homesick, even though I am only a half hour drive away from my home! But I know I would only be bored and depressed. No tricks. No food, except handouts and stuff the looters are selling that I refuse to have anything to do with. Then again, I do have my Smith machine and power cage there... and my big dumbbells. Just handles and loose plates, here, and not enough to make up good dummies for squatting or deadlifting or shrugs, or even BP for that matter. My lifts have gone up as I have grown accustomed to the extra work of getting them up into position and controlling them. Now I find myself short of plates. And the hassle of changing plates! I am so spoiled, Miss Thaing! I have cast and pre-made dumbbells for most smaller lifts and only need to add or remove plates on the big lifts like for legs or traps work. So I guess I am better off here bored than home bored, but I still miss my home. My neighbors have been quite accepting and friendly, but I don't dare dress or behave any way other than perfectly ladylike, and I am not by nature a ladylike lady. Especially now... the tren enanthate is beginning to diddle with my head. My first enanthate cycle. I want to get out there and do my thing! Well, I am staying sort of busy. I was invited to a barbecue yesterday and had such a nice time, though one shy young man simply could not bring himself to speak with me. I could see the adoration in his eyes, but it was the whole transphobia thing, you know. A west bank boy simply can't afford to be thought a "fag". Sigh. And I would have enjoyed his tender young body so much! But the food was good, there was some beer, and I met some nice people and had a great time with others that I knew but now know better. Oh, piffle. I am getting off topic and running off at the keyboard again.Anna, you and yours make it that way! The eccentricities of that city will ensure its return, in my opinion.
Loving kisses
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
Girl, you will be a tigress in the sack with a bit of test! The effect on your attitude and confidence will amaze you. However the physical virilizing effects might not be what you want. Try small doses of prop, or suspension if you can find it. If unpleasant sides begin to appear, such as unwanted hair growth, you can stop the testosterone and symptoms will mostly subside. With Enanthate, or Cypionate, you are stuck with it in your body for a long time, during which it continues to do its work. I hope someday to have a female lover who likes running test. I can't think of anything more exciting! I would trade a dozen brad pitts for one MizFit or Jersey or Paris going wild on test!Originally Posted by Mizfit
Kisses and Tickles
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
Dally, you are such a dear, and so polite, too! No wonder all the female members love you, you sweetheart! Yes, I have to leave a few booboos in my posts, so everyone knows I am not cheating with a spell checker or grammar checker. (Those things don't work well, anyway!)Originally Posted by Dally
Thank you, Darling! I feel like a winner when I read uplifting posts like yours! I don't know what I do to deserve such royal treatment, but thank you. A movie or book? Girl, the world is not ready for that. I think it has been tried. The only way to pull it off would be to have a trans director and producer, or a trans editor or publisher. Cisgendered people tend to warp things. Anyway, I would not care for the notoriety. I have just the right amount, as it is. I am known and respected in my social circles, and accepted into enough others. My true identity is fairly secure on this board... one would have to actively seek out trans venues and transfolk and linger among us for a while to figure out who I am. I long ago began working more off the phone than on the street, and graduated from the "boy-with-tits-in-a-dress" crowd, the real "shemales". Actually the term is sort of a slur as applied to a TS. I suppose it is like Black people calling each other "niggah"... I have taken the word and made it mine, robbing it of its power to insult.Originally Posted by Dally
Thank you, Dear. I have been fortunate, actually. TSs have an unbelievably high suicide rate. It is difficult to cope, much harder than most cisgendered folk can ever imagine. Depression is common. Over-use of estrogen often worsens depression. Drugs are a constant enemy, as is alcohol. Self esteem issues come into play. Carrying a bit of muscle and using a bit of test has helped me considerably, and I lucked out in falling in with some good and loyal friends early in my transition. Sometimes I feel guilty for not helping the younger queens along the way. Only thing is, most of the ones I try to help don't want it or don't know how to take it or have gone the drug route. Most simply don't have the courage to leave the trans scene and just be a regular woman without all the "OH GIRL!" routine. I guess I am like that in a way. I keep thinking about applying for a grant or a loan and getting another career started, but there is always a reason not to get started. Or an excuse. I will do something, though. I refuse to be just another tired old queen that people feel sorry for and buy a drink for but don't want to talk to. I know one girl who has reverted to a more or less male life and bartends in the quarter, and she is half miserable, half resigned. The only men interested in her are gay men, and she doesn't like gay men. Most TS don't care for them as lovers. Straight men, of course, are not attracted to her, no matter how fat or old or desperate or ugly they are, because she presents as a man. A connoisseur of misery. An artist of unhappiness. Not me, Girl!Originally Posted by Dally
You are not a pig, Darling... you are a perfect gentleman.Originally Posted by Dally
Love
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
I prefer Var/Primo combo, much less risk of virilization and the two DHT derivatives have me going wild, believe me!!Originally Posted by Anna Bollick
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i'm all woman baby cakes.. and i think i got enough test in me with out some dbol
Originally Posted by Anna Bollick
i agree with yaOriginally Posted by Jerzey
MMMMmmmm.... I bet! what does your typical cycle look like? Dose-wise, that is.
Loving Kisses
Anna Bollick, J.S.R.H.
Originally Posted by Mizfit
Haha...PASSSSS!!
Right now I'm running 10mg ED Var and 50mg E3D of Primo but tomorrow is week 4 and up goes the Var since I'm doing ok at this dose. I started the Var at 5mg ED since I never ran it with Primo before and I don't want to risk virilization. I will increase the Var first because the Primo is inject so it's easier to lower the Var if I have to.Originally Posted by Anna Bollick
You look good just how you areOriginally Posted by Mizfit
Do you take AAS?
I'm pretty lean on my own and gain muscle eaisly.... not against it and if i needed it.. i would take var or primo
Originally Posted by Jerzey
Unless you are looking to "build" (which I recall you saying you aren't) you wouldn't need either...Originally Posted by Mizfit
nope i can already build pretty eaisly on my own.. as it is:POriginally Posted by Jerzey
This has been a suprisingly and thoroughly enjoyable thread.
Bump for Dally's Daily addition.
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