After my thread http://forums.steroid.com/showthread.php?t=198163 i found the following on another board and thought it was very well written and very true. Having been a forner "nice guy" I can relate....The last two paragraphs are very, very true...
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The first set is a couple of quotations from a woman's board on how women perceive NiceGuys:
Female Opinions:
Alexsis - 05:34pm Dec 1 EST (#65 of 84)
Here, here to that!
I hate "nice" guys (some of them :0) I totally agree that they are really just
passive-aggressive losers that lack the intestinal fortitude to take on certain
leadership roles in rel'ps.
I dated a "nice" guy this summer, who when we went out constantly talked about
how much he hated players, and that the players always get the women by lying
and cheating.
Now that hindsight is 20/20, I feel he was just jealous of their confident aura
(not that I condone player types), but they do have a certain kind of
take-charge confidence. Anyway, down with the
"nice-I-am-really-to-scared-to-do-anthing-else guy" Double Yuck!
Marriage2000 - 05:39pm Dec 15, 2000 EST (#3620 of 3653)
Had date ((DZ) with youngerguy last night (27). He was a perfect gentleman
(except for being 1/2 an hour late). Brought me chocolate. Then took me out to
nice (expensive) dinner and for desert later. We have a lot in common. But poor
guy, he was tripping all over himself to try to please me.
He went to Ivy league schools all the way for EE, so I am guessing he's smart
enough. His mom had him when she was in her 40's...his parents are older.
Do I continue to see him? I want him as a friend, but anything else....is very
questionable. Or should I spare myself the time? He needs training and needs to
learn to relax around women. (He's never had a gf). He world probably make a
really good friend/activities partner (since we have so much in common).
This is why men should be jerks. It's simply what women want:
Somehow, most women seem to go after all the wrong
guys for all the wrongs reasons.
To completely end the mystery that perhaps many of
you men in the group may have been wondering about
for a while, most women absolutely DO go after jerks.
But to say "jerk" is not a truly accurate description
of the type of men these women go after. You might just
say that they go after men who are incredibly self-confident
with women. But that would not be completely accurate either.
You could say that they go after the man who is not afraid
of their ***** (please forgive the blunt language), but that
too, would not be totally accurate.
Well the truth is this. Women, more times than not, don't
even know THEMSELVES what it is they are after. Very
seldom do the ever stop to sit down and think of what kind
of guy they would really like to have in their life.
Their idea is ambiguous at best.
So it comes down to this. Women just plainly and purely end
up going after the guy who can make them feel the best.
Period. The WAYS in which they are made to feel good by
the guy(s) they ultimately select are irrelevant.
That's where, and why, they get into trouble.
In an instant gratification society, they just go after
what turns them on the most, first. This is where the so-called
"nice-guy" loses out (which is not an accurate description also).
The so-called nice guy is generally not a smooth-talker. He does
not come-on like he has loads and loads of great feelings and
highs to spare, and generally not extrememly outspoken. From
women's viewpoint, this is taken in all sorts of erroneous ways
that it probably shouldn't be taken. But that's life, and the
legacy of the poor "nice-guy."
In passing, it should be noted for the record, that not ALL
women go after the so-called "jerk" types. Do you want to know
which women do? Only the women you want. So in that light, you
may as well say "all" of them, right?
So how does what I have said relate to the subject of this
post.
When women continue to ****-over the guys they really should
perhaps AT LEAST consider giving more of a chance to, these guys
eventually, and usually quite quickly, begin to realize what
kind of men the women they would like to have are going after.
The result is that one day something just snaps inside of them,
and they begin to emulate and become like the "jerks" that "most"
women seem to love so much. In order to become that kind of man
effectively, it usually has to be taken all the way to the end,
for the "jerk" mindset would not be truly established if it were
not. What that amounts to is becoming the "jerk" that smooth
talks women and turns them on in many ways by showing that they
have loads and loads of great feelings and highs to spare all for
the woman. And in the end, after they have been promptly ****ed,
the guy dumps them. Why? Because that is the jerk's, and the women
who go after jerks, legacy.
So when women inadvertently, or purposely, create so-called
"jerks" out of so-called "nice guys", they are just inadvertently
****ing over other women, their own kind.
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Originally Posted by xtinaunasty
