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  1. #1
    spywizard's Avatar
    spywizard is offline AR-Elite Hall of Famer~
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    In the Gym, if i could
    Posts
    15,895

    Things Hall mark cards can't say

    THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T SAY



    ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
    M
    y tire was thumping.

    I thought it was flat

    When I looked at the tire...

    I noticed your cat.

    Sorry!



    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~



    L
    ooking back over the years

    that we've been together,

    I can't help but wonder...

    "What the hell was I thinking?"




    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

    C
    ongratulations on your wedding day!

    Too bad no one likes your husband.

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~


    H
    ow could two people as beautiful as you

    Have such an ugly baby?

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~


    I
    've always wanted to have

    someone to hold,

    someone to love

    After having met you ..

    I've changed my mind.


    -------------------------------------- ----------------------------------------------------------


    I
    must admit, you brought Religion into my life.

    I never believed in Hell until I met you.

    ! //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

    A
    s the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...

    That you're not here to ruin it for me.

    ################################################## ##


    C
    ongratulations on your promotion.

    Before you go...

    Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

    You'll probably need it again.

    ************************************************** ******************************

    H
    appy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

    (Available only in Tennessee, Kentucky & West Virginia)


    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~


    H
    appy birthday! You look great for your age.

    Almost Lifelike!

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~


    W
    hen we were together,

    you always said you'd die for me.

    Now that we've broken up,

    I think it's time you kept your promise.

    //////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

    W
    e have been friends for a very long time .

    let's say we stop
    .

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ +++


    I
    'm so miserable without you

    it's almost like you're here.

    ================================================== ===

    C
    ongratulations on your new bundle of joy.

    Did you ever find out who the father was?

    %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%


    Y
    our friends and I wanted to do

    something special for your birthday

    So we're having you put to sleep.

    )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))


    S
    o your daughter's a hooker,

    and it spoiled your day.

    Look at the bright side,

    it's really good pay.
    The answer to your every question

    Rules

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  2. #2
    Keyser Sozey is offline Anabolic Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Miami
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    2,841
    LMAO @ Happy Birthday Uncle-Dad...

  3. #3
    almostgone's Avatar
    almostgone is online now AR-Platinum Elite- Hall of Famer
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    the lower carolina
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    24,479
    ....LMAO.....
    ....I see a new card company on the horizon....."Sentimentally Brutal Thoughts"...by Spywizard....
    There are 3 loves in my life: my wife, my English mastiffs, and my weightlifting....Man, my wife gets really pissed when I get the 3 confused...
    A minimum of 100 posts and 45 days membership required for source checks. Source checks are performed at my discretion.

  4. #4
    SHRED's Avatar
    SHRED is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    CT *Formerly Buff_Daddy*
    Posts
    1,209
    Lmao

  5. #5
    SprinterOne's Avatar
    SprinterOne is offline Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
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    An apartment
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    1,048
    Haha, very funny.

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