cheating or not cheating

[chigirl]

Ok I found out my husband has been calling a mutal friend of ours only when I am not home. My husband went to high school with her and is working with her.
I requested a phone log of all outgoing calls and saw he was calling her. He says they are just friends that the reason he did not tell me is because he did not want to upset me. He says they would talk about me and her boyfriend and vent about work. He also says they talked about things to do for me like suprises and gifts for christmas. Help I don't know what to think!!! Is he cheating or not?
What are other signs that he is cheating? I need all the help I can get. thanks

Hmmmm

[chest6]

Well theres 2 different things here.

My old gf.talked to her ex all the time..talked in like a "Cute voice" and shit and would erase her calls from her phone and would go see him sometimes. They would talk everyday. She kissed him when I was at my aunts funeral..and I caught her doing it cuz she didnt think I would be back for another day.

Me..I talk to my ex now..just online to see how things are going w/ her bf and how things were going w/ mine. I would NEVER see her. Oh and also on the above she would tell him she loved him. I would never say I love you to this girl that would be really awkward.

Basically I think him seeing her is not a good sign. I dont think its ok for them to see each other.

[Keyser Sozey]

If he is talking to her behind your back, then something should ring a bell. I don't think he did not mention anything, b/c he did not want to upset you, more like he did not want you to know in the first place.
I have never cheated, so I wouldn't know of any tell tale signs. What have you noticed differently?

Btw, you are registered as a male member. When you get the option, pm a mod and he will help you.

[chest6]

If he is talking to her behind your back, then something should ring a bell. I don't think he did not mention anything, b/c he did not want to upset you, more like he did not want you to know in the first place.
I have never cheated, so I wouldn't know of any tell tale signs. What have you noticed differently?

Btw, you are registered as a male member. When you get the option, pm a mod and he will help you.

That too..my gf would say like "I didnt want you to see cuz you would get mad". That is very true...they just dont want you to know.

[chigirl]

he says they havn't hung out together outside of work. he says they just talk on the phone. He says he won't call her anymore, and he called her infront of me and said he does not want to be friends any more that what was doing wasn't write and that he is not going to lose me over this. I am going to meet her for lunch tommorrow? do you think she is going to tell me if they are cheating or messing around? thank you for replying

[chest6]

he says they havn't hung out together outside of work. he says they just talk on the phone. He says he won't call her anymore, and he called her infront of me and said he does not want to be friends any more that what was doing wasn't write and that he is not going to lose me over this. I am going to meet her for lunch tommorrow? do you think she is going to tell me if they are cheating or messing around? thank you for replying

SHe might. I have talked to the guy my gf talked to any he would just be like..what did she say we did? He would never tell me straight up. I was like hey..if you tell me yall fooled around i wont ever talk to her again and you can have her for yourself..he stil didnt say nuthin. That is def. a good sign him doing that. My gf was like.." I will never stop talking to him, so deal with it" That was a major problem...Then again...we arent married

[copenhagen]

wow, talk about some tension at lunch! if i were you i would definately be suspicious. i mean, doesn't he have male friends that he can talk shit about work with. i just don't buy the "christmas present and surprises thing"

did it tell you how long the calls were?

[chigirl]

He was acting distant to me. He was getting upset about little things. That what made me start looking to see if he is cheating.

[chest6]

He was acting distant to me. He was getting upset about little things. That what made me start looking to see if he is cheating.

not a good sign. I have never been like this before..but I started checking my gfs phone after she kissed him and she would delete his calls after she got off the phone w/ him

[Keyser Sozey]

Alot of things can happen at "work." I don't want to sound negative, but why would he say "what he was doing wasn't right, and he is not going to lose you over this." If it was plutonic, then nothing of the like should have been mentioned.
Anyway, the secret convos are a no no. There should be no secrets in a marriage (except the whole steroid issue, which does not need to be mentioned....Sorry for that left field comment).
Would you tell her if you were messing around w/ her man? Probably not.

[chigirl]

Yes the bill told me how long each call was for. Why?

[chest6]

If they were for like an hour..thats no good.

[Keyser Sozey]

He was acting distant to me. He was getting upset about little things. That what made me start looking to see if he is cheating.

Yup, acting weird would be a sign.
His conscience is getting to him, so he is taking it out on you.

[chigirl]

I would tell her if I wanted him, but i have never went after a married man or aguy that is already taken.

[Keyser Sozey]

We need Dr Phil

[collar]

Ok I found out my husband has been calling a mutal friend of ours only when I am not home. My husband went to high school with her and is working with her.
I requested a phone log of all outgoing calls and saw he was calling her. He says they are just friends that the reason he did not tell me is because he did not want to upset me. He says they would talk about me and her boyfriend and vent about work. He also says they talked about things to do for me like suprises and gifts for christmas. Help I don't know what to think!!! Is he cheating or not?
What are other signs that he is cheating? I need all the help I can get. thanks

Hmmmm

well im not trying to be rude here... but you should know your husband better than all of us.. so by now you should know when your husband is lying or been cheating or whateva....
but yeah go talk to the woman see what she says how she acts..
if she tries to hide anything anything then yes they did do something and he did cheat..
that simple....

[chest6]

I assume you have never cheated on him

[Keyser Sozey]

I would tell her if I wanted him, but i have never went after a married man or aguy that is already taken.

Yes, but apparently, she has.

[copenhagen]

well if it was more than like 10 minutes then that would also have me concerned

[chigirl]

no I have never cheated on him. Even if he cheated on me I wouldn't cheat on him I would just leave him!

[chest6]

ya..my gf cheated on me and i never had the want to cheat on her..not just something i do to get back at someone. I forgave her..but i should have broke up w her...o well in the future if i get cheated on its breakup time

[chigirl]

is this the same girl-f that is calling her x? How did you get past it? How did you trust her again?

[Keyser Sozey]

no I have never cheated on him. Even if he cheated on me I wouldn't cheat on him I would just leave him!

If this does not make a turn for the better, I hope that you will be able to follow through w/ the last part of your statement.

[Keyser Sozey]

Btw, once a cheater, always a cheater. How can you gain back trust when it has been broken? Some may have the ability to do so, but I sure as hell don't.

[chigirl]

Yes I will Because I am young, attractive, smart.

[BG]

he says they havn't hung out together outside of work. he says they just talk on the phone. He says he won't call her anymore, and he called her infront of me and said he does not want to be friends any more that what was doing wasn't write and that he is not going to lose me over this. I am going to meet her for lunch tommorrow? do you think she is going to tell me if they are cheating or messing around? thank you for replying

Thats the way things start.

[BG]

Btw, once a cheater, always a cheater. How can you gain back trust when it has been broken? Some may have the ability to do so, but I sure as hell don't.

So true!!!!!

[chigirl]

I agree once a cheater always a cheater. I have to find more evidence if he is or not? Do any of you have friends that are girls? We use to go on double dates together.

[chigirl]

what are other signs i should look for?

[Keyser Sozey]

Well, if this is true then you can call me when the drama's over
JK

[chigirl]

guys I am only 23 years old now tell me if it won't be easy to find a replacement

[Keyser Sozey]

what are other signs i should look for?

Anything out of the ordinary, is what you should be looking for.

[BG]

Doubt you'll have a problem.

[Keyser Sozey]

guys I am only 23 years old now tell me if it won't be easy to find a replacement

LMFAO @ "A Replacement."
If you are smart, attractive, and young there should be no problem in finding "a replacement".

[chigirl]

have any of you cheated before and how did you act when they said something to you? Did you act mad or act like you didn't give a shit? What did you say to the person?

[alphaman]

I'd say from what you've talked about so far........ It doesn't look good. I obiviously can't say "yes, he is", or, "no, he isn't", but the signs are pointing to the former.

[Keyser Sozey]

I'd say from what you've talked about so far........ It doesn't look good. I obiviously can't say "yes, he is", or, "no, he isn't", but the signs are pointing to the former.

I concur 100%

[Evil Predator]

Hey, if you dont trust him, leave him....

Without trust, you've just got a big problem on your hands.

[taiboxa]

i say kill him ..

[chest6]

is this the same girl-f that is calling her x? How did you get past it? How did you trust her again?

i dont and I never will Thats the thing..maybe I could have forgiven her if she stopped talking to him..but she talked to him after she kissed him..