You ever get slandered?

[Mike Dura]

It's something that seems effective in politics (see what Karl Rove does). Just attack a person's character by twisting or totally fabricating the "facts." I'll never forget what happened to me a few years ago. There was this older woman who was fairly hot and she walked around with her two daughters like a little peacock. She seemed to be a serial dater and was often seen with guys just a smidge too young for her. I observed this person and felt turned off by her. So I decided to completely avoid her. Nevertheless, I always suspected that she'd eventually approach me. That day came and I was completely unresponsive. As expected she backed off. About two months later she approached me again. I rudely ignored her to make my position very clear. I really wanted nothing to do with her. Then, she started staring me down in the gym which I thought was pretty rude. At fist I ignored her but she wouldn't relent. Than one day I got pissed and said "do we have some kind of misundstanding." She says, "I don't even know you? I've never even seen you before." I say, "then stop staring me down it's rude!" She then yells out "get away from me buddy!" Now I look like the stalker. Then she told people that I came up to her and told her that I dream about her. Can you believe that? Surreal. I've never been slandered before (not to my knowledge anyway). It's amazing that there are people out there like this.

[Teabagger]

hell mike it happens everyday on this board Sure I think most of us have been slandered before one way or another and unfortunately there is really no recourse. in law you first must prove the slander, then you have to prove you were harmed by it in some monetary or emotional way....almost impossible to do. Sometimes the best response is to burn their car....... j/k. This woman you describe is obviously psycho....be careful 'cause b*tches like this will also falsely accuse men of rape, assualt, etc... You might want to change gyms cause the old adage is true...'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' and that is what you did to her.........good luck and remeber to duck...

[D7M]

she sounds pretty psycho to me, too. avoid her like the plague, no eye contact even, she's just pissed b/c she didnt' get her way

[Mike Dura]

I had to leave the gym. This happened a few years ago actually. I walked into the gym and the staff behind the desk looked at me like I was a freak! I talk to one of the staffers I was friendly with and he told me that this person left behind a note to the owners describing how I was stalking her and that I went up to her and said that "I dream about her." Unbelievable. So when the owner saw me, he just sat there and oggled at me.

The amazing thing is that if a person decides to slander you, people seem to automatically believe the slander.

She was an outgoing person in the gym - friends with everyone (and bed mate of many a young lad) and I was an introverted guy who focused on training. Obviously she had the advantage here. Who do you believe - this nice attractive woman or that guy who's quiet and screams under 1000 pnds on the leg press?

A person slandered definately has no recourse. You can't make an anouncement - Hey people. Karen said that I was stalking her. It was the other way around! She's the stalker who can't seem to handle rejection.

Yeah, she is a psycho. And she lied to her own daughters about it too. It's shocking to no end. I would never do something like that to anyone. It would never even occur to me as an option. Wow. People are fuked!




The amazing thing is realizing that a person can c

hell mike it happens everyday on this board Sure I think most of us have been slandered before one way or another and unfortunately there is really no recourse. in law you first must prove the slander, then you have to prove you were harmed by it in some monetary or emotional way....almost impossible to do. Sometimes the best response is to burn their car....... j/k. This woman you describe is obviously psycho....be careful 'cause b*tches like this will also falsely accuse men of rape, assualt, etc... You might want to change gyms cause the old adage is true...'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned' and that is what you did to her.........good luck and remeber to duck...

[hotstuff]

yep....the bad thing about people in your situation is that people believe the psycho person over you! I think it's because people just like to see bad in other people. it makes life more exciting to them somehow. it's sad actually.

but people like that usually don't do that sord of stuff more than once....and if she hangs out in the same place all the time she will do it again...and eventually people will start to notice HER as the freak.
Karma will come back around on that crazy b****!

[Mike Dura]

I don't think her advances often get turned down. She's used to getting her way with men. Me - blatently blowing her off was an offront to her vanity and she was one vain person.

I'm sure people who have dated her have stories though. She has to be a little off to do something that malicious.

But I think you're right about people wanting to see the bad in others. Kind of like the primordial blood lust. There is a motiff in mythology dealing with "the shadow" - it's gotten alot of attention from literary theories such as psychoanalysis. The idea is that we project aspects of ourselves onto the world (both good and bad - as in the shadow). For example, when I see that guy over there who I deem "bad" or inferior or "the hapless one," he becomes my externalized sense of inferiority, if that makes sense. In literature, you see this as what's called "the double" - like the good witch, bad witch (wizard of oz), good brother, bad brother (ordinary people), Normal working guy and Tyler Durden (Fight Club), and of course, Dr. Jeykle and Mr. Hyde.

Similarly, you've probably heard the addage "every family has a black sheep and every nation has a scapegoat (the Jew and the antisemite)."

A good movie dealing with this theme is "Ordinary People." Conrad is that black sheep. The opposite was the dead brother who was the "holy cow" or the favored one. They were both externalized aspects of their mother's narcissistic personality.

There is a logic to scapegoating: It seems that in defining what is bad (to disasociate yourself from it) and to define what is good (to identify with it) we define ourselves (e.g, like me and "not me"). It's about self-concept (meaning) and an attendant sense of self-esteem. Scapegoating is generally linked to narcissism. That's well known.

It also creates sensation. Everyday life is routinized and regimented so an event like this breaks the monotany and makes for good entertainment.

Anway, I agree with you, people do like to see bad in others. All of this is a major source of human evil.

yep....the bad thing about people in your situation is that people believe the psycho person over you! I think it's because people just like to see bad in other people. it makes life more exciting to them somehow. it's sad actually.

but people like that usually don't do that sord of stuff more than once....and if she hangs out in the same place all the time she will do it again...and eventually people will start to notice HER as the freak.
Karma will come back around on that crazy b****!

[hotstuff]

hey no offense to you AT ALL! but i had to read that post a couple of times.
damn.....maybe that's an offense to me! lol

[Mike Dura]

Lol!

hey no offense to you AT ALL! but i had to read that post a couple of times.
damn.....maybe that's an offense to me! lol

[gymnutt]

Dam, she did this a few years ago and you're still mad. I've had people pull sh*t in the past and have blown them off and just let it go to avoid a big scene and what I've found is that people like that take advantage of the situation and just make your life worse by running their games behind your back. If I encounter a situation where someone trys to test me for no reason other than to boost their own ego I make a point to put them in their place FAST, keep em down, and don't give them a chance to get back up. People like that will make your life a living hell if you give the room to do it. Sounds to me like she's probally got a looonngg list of people she's burned..if that's so, I'm sure she wouldn't know where to look if karma caught up with her. Peace, and I hope you don't bump into that crazy chick again.

[Mike Dura]

I hear that brother. People like this are toxic. Thinking back on it too, I was severely depressed during that period of time. I guess that's why I took it hard rather than just taking it in stride. Even still, I'll never forget it. And I guess it's good to know that this can happen to you. You gotta be careful and watch out for yourself. I know in job situations I always play it safe because all it takes is one person who has it out for you and has no principles to guide them in fair play, it's always a possibility that this can happen.

Dam, she did this a few years ago and you're still mad. I've had people pull sh*t in the past and have blown them off and just let it go to avoid a big scene and what I've found is that people like that take advantage of the situation and just make your life worse by running their games behind your back. If I encounter a situation where someone trys to test me for no reason other than to boost their own ego I make a point to put them in their place FAST, keep em down, and don't give them a chance to get back up. People like that will make your life a living hell if you give the room to do it. Sounds to me like she's probally got a looonngg list of people she's burned..if that's so, I'm sure she wouldn't know where to look if karma caught up with her. Peace, and I hope you don't bump into that crazy chick again.

[Unoid]

sometimes the only way to get the better of people like that (generally liberals)
you gotta play dirty, adn by dirty, blow up her car.. She won't be able to prove anything even if she'd acuse you, but it'd make ven a retarded bitch like that know who not to **** with.

[IBdmfkr]

Yea Mike, ppl like this have accidents everyday.. lol
oh yea, j/k

[Mike Dura]

You're giving me ideas! Hmmmmmm!

Yea Mike, ppl like this have accidents everyday.. lol
oh yea, j/k