What would you guys do in this case?

[Italion Stallion07]

Whats up fellas.

I have a small problem and i dont know what to do. I have a little brother who is 18 years old. This summer i bought a new car and i gave him my old one(1994 ford taurus SHO). not a bad car. it was worth about 3-4k. He didnt have a job and actually never had had one before so i told him he could have the car if he worked full time an dhe paid me 500$ at the end of the summer.

Long story short. he lost two jobs and the LONGEST he stayed at one these jobs was a week. one of the jobs was also a family friend who served him easy money on a platter and he still ****ed things up. Needless to say im pretty disapointed in the kid. I am only 20 and in college. i cant afford to be giving away cars for free.

End up summer is comign up and i ask him for my money and he gives me a million excuses and says he doesnt have any money. at that point i just told him im real dispointed and i needed to think about some shit...


now i dont knwo if i should go to his house and take the car back and the plates or just let him have it. he is my brother and i feel bad taking it away but im also not his father and i shouldnt have to do this type of stuff for him...


what do you guys think i should do about it?

[IronFreakX]

Take the car back, fvck it.

You gave him a chance and went out of your way to help him out and this is how he repays you??

If he wants your trust and your respect again, he must earn it.

[1819]

he is your brother. let him have it. its just a car. just tell him not to ask for anything again and if he grows up a little then hopefully he'll offer to make good.

[Bojangles69]

where is the father??

but still, blood or not, if he agreed to something and flaked out of that agreement, take the shit back. your just teaching him what real life is like. my bro would do that shit to me anyday, and id still love his ass

[Italion Stallion07]

the only think thats holding me back is that i think " is it worth it to ruin the friendship we have over a small ammount of money" he is young and really self centered so i dont think he is goign to just wake up after i take this car and think "i need to get his trust back" ...

hes going to wake up and think " **** him ill just have someone pick me up instead."

[IronFreakX]

the only think thats holding me back is that i think " is it worth it to ruin the friendship we have over a small ammount of money" he is young and really self centered so i dont think he is goign to just wake up after i take this car and think "i need to get his trust back" ...

hes going to wake up and think " **** him ill just have someone pick me up instead."

And thats a reason to just let him have it??

Brother or not, I wouldnt give someone my car if they had that attitude much less do anything for em.

Disrespect is one thing I do not take lightly and that was deff disrespect!

[rake922]

Let him keep the car.

BTW -That car is 12 years old and it's not worth what you said it's worth.
http://www.kbb.com/

[Italion Stallion07]

where is the father??

but still, blood or not, if he agreed to something and flaked out of that agreement, take the shit back. your just teaching him what real life is like. my bro would do that shit to me anyday, and id still love his ass

my father was killed about 14 years ago. he is my blood also. not a step or anything.

[IronFreakX]

Actually that website just said it is

[Herris]

I say take it back until he coughs up half to at least prove he intends to pay the rest.

[Italion Stallion07]

he is your brother. let him have it. its just a car. just tell him not to ask for anything again and if he grows up a little then hopefully he'll offer to make good.

this is exactly how i see it but i still dont feel right NOT teaching him a lesson in what real life is like... so im torn


also lol its not realy important what teh car costs... it was low mileage and in great condition... but thats all irrelevant. even if the car was worth 500 and i asked for 500 its the same story

[DamnYouMSN]

let him have the car.

[Bojangles69]

my father was killed about 14 years ago. he is my blood also. not a step or anything.

damn sorry to hear that. but okay this is how i would go about it because the fact is theres other MUCH more important things than just the car. Like his general demeanor towards life and his relationships with other people.

As a brother in your situation you probaly feel more than a brotherly oligation being as though your fathers gone and thats fine. But take his whole character into consideration, cause if was up to me thats what ultimately matters. If i was a self-centered, lazy, arrogant little 18 y/old kid (may have added some words that dont describe him) my brother would take the car back to say "dude its not really the car, but your attitude towards life in general sucks".

so consider those things to. if hes going to college and doing good and school, and is just a typical teenager than you probaly could chalk it up to age and let him keep it. but if hes as i described above, id take it back and let him hate me for it. but you know it, everytime he calls someone for a ride he'll be thinking about this shit. thats why when you do take the car back, make sure you say "im not doing this because im a dick, im doing this because your [insert qualities he needs to change]"

you'll anchor those qualities from you to the car to him and everytime hes waiting for a ride he'll be deliberating whether or not he should have just been a more stand up brother.. TRUST ME. not always best to take the easy way ouy, but its more a judgement call than anything.

[Sta11ion]

If you let him have it and not work for it he will think that he can always depend on you to get him out of things....would you want that for the rest of your life or do you want him independant.

[Italion Stallion07]

thanks for the responses so far guys...

[steve0]

look bro, if your not gonna teach him a lesson or two then who is ??? really if you let this slide it will lead to many more, next he will ask you for money or something you never know i know people like your brother and they never seem to get there shit togather unless someone kicks them in the ass a few times he needs you to wake him up man.

Take the car back and sell the damn thing

[1819]

this is exactly how i see it but i still dont feel right NOT teaching him a lesson in what real life is like... so im torn


also lol its not realy important what teh car costs... it was low mileage and in great condition... but thats all irrelevant. even if the car was worth 500 and i asked for 500 its the same story

tough to teach an 18 yr old a lesson anyway. gave both my kid brothers the downpayments on their houses. they both had $ to put down but asked if they could put down extra. gave it to them. one tryed to pay me back. i didnt take it. now he gets anything he needs although he makes a great living on his own. my youngest brother never even attempted to repay. one day he comes to me and wants $ for some stupid car. viper or cobra or somethin. bugged me for months. told him to start repaying the house money. he bitched and moaned but managed to scrape up a few grand here and there. lesson learned. plus i told him to buy his own vanity items. car for work would be different. a viper for no reason. barkin up the wrong tree.

[cfiler]

I'd take it back. He needs to learn how to be responsible. If he can't keep a job, how's he going to be able to run and maintain a car?

[Liftnainez]

Let him keep the car bro. Family is the most important thing in life. Instead of punishing him, maybe teach him. Maybe he needs YOUR help. Dont fight especially over money.. Its just a car bro.. let him keep it, but go speak to him and see why he ****s up so much with these jobs..

[J.S.N.]

you already said it yourself man- you can't afford to be giving away cars. take it, sell it, and give him his $500. you aren't ****ing up shit. he's ****ing up shit by not paying you.

[SMAN12b]

Well, he IS your brother, but if he looks up to you and you just let him walk on his agreement, how will he ever learn responsibility?? He is a man and as such should be held accountable. I dont' think you have to lose your friendship , but there has to be respect and how can he respect you if he knows he can make a deal with you and just walk out of it with no consequences??

Its a tough love decision, but if he doesn't learn responsibility from YOU , who will always forgive him no matter what, who is he gonna learn it from? a loan shark that will break his legs if he doesn't keep to his bargain?

Take the car, UNTIL he proves he can hold a job!!

Just my humble opinion

[stayinstacked]

look man, just let him keep the damn thing. I understand it's the principle of the matter that your upset about and not the $, but most kids at 18 yrs old cant save money. It's hard to, all of your friends are always going out, some come from money and you wanna hang out with them and go out to eat and such to be with the guys. It takes some people longer than others to grow up, I was one of them,I still am sometimes. He might not understand the big issue now, but someday he'll hopefully look back on it and realize he had a cool brother for doing that. Life isnt always fair, but dont let some car come between you guys, especially a Ford.

[Italion Stallion07]

you already said it yourself man- you can't afford to be giving away cars. take it, sell it, and give him his $500. you aren't ****ing up shit. he's ****ing up shit by not paying you.

what?





Thanks for the responses guys..

heres what i did... he called me yesterday and said "mom is so ****ing cheap, she wont get me stuff for school" so i went into a speech about how if he had worked he woudlnt need people to take care of him. he could take care of him self.then i told him im disapointed in him and that he has built a terrible character and work ethic. i told him that he can not burn his bridges the way he does.i told him i was his brother and ill be there for him no matter how many times he ****s up but right now the best way for me to be there for him is to take the car away and try to teach you a lesson. nothing in life is free. Im not mad at all im just very disapointed in you. and that was it... i drove over. took the keys out of the car. popped the hood and disconnected the battery(incase he had a spare made) locked it up and drove away.


****ing asshole didnt say a word to me either when i said all this. "i dont wanna talk about it" he said. not even a thank you for the car this summer i am really sorry i coudlnt pay you back but i apreciate what you did anyways.

[audis4]

Ya bro, you don't want to hate/not talking to one of your best friends (bro) for life over a $3,000 object.
You gotta understand, he's only 18 (you need to let him know what you expect of him or he will start paying rent etc.), he'll man up. Set up some priorities for the school year and the upcoming summer because you still expect the $500 cash from the car. I dunno it's hard to give advice when I'm not in that situation but that's what I would most likely do. Good luck.

[Italion Stallion07]

Ya bro, you don't want to hate/not talking to one of your best friends (bro) for life over a $3,000 object.
You gotta understand, he's only 18 (you need to let him know what you expect of him or he will start paying rent etc.), he'll man up. Set up some priorities for the school year and the upcoming summer because you still expect the $500 cash from the car. I dunno it's hard to give advice when I'm not in that situation but that's what I would most likely do. Good luck.

i dont live with him bro he lives with my mother.. i moved out when i was 17 lol. i dont get along with her...

[audis4]

Oh I see...well, I would let it go and instead of him paying you $500, he finds a full time job during the summer and a part time during the school year. I wouldn't make it a huge issue IMO, just move on and know what he's capable of.
Make sure he knows that he HAS to find a job whether you still want the $500 or not.

[Donman25]

Man that is exactly why I don't like to deal with family. You feel bad if it doesn't work out. Is the car still in your name? or Did you put a lein on it? or Did you just give it to him on his word and let him put it in his name? I would go get the car back and sell it. I had a similar thing happen to me. I gave a family member a truck and they where suposed to pay payments. They paid 1 payment and I never got another penny. I never said a word. Two years later the truck breaks down and he tells everyone I sold him a junk truck. I was still a a$$hole in the long run and never got the money for the truck. What would he do if the table was turned??

[MoneyAddyct]

You wouldn't be ruining a friendship over a "small amount of money." The money itself is not the issue. The issue is that he had a responsibility to make good on an agreement and he failed to do so. I say take the car back and when he can make good, he'll get the car. He had 3-4 months to make $500 and I don't know many people who COULDN'T do that.

[Andorious]

i would take the car back, brother or not he should be able to understand an agreement at 18 years old. he's also old enough that he should be able to hold down a job for a summer. I don't think he can really fault you for taking it back, because he agreed to the deal before the summer started. only person he can blame is himself. if u really wanna be nice, make him a new deal where he makes up for his slacking in the summer by working during school or w/e he's doing.

[Italion Stallion07]

hahah guys read my post i told you what i did...


TAKEN!

[dedic8ed1]

He's just a snotnose kid right now he;ll grow up but it shouldn't be at your expense,hey we all went thru it.I'd say give him the car back but with more stipulations cause without the car he might start fukin up with drugs an shit