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  1. #81
    D3m3nt3d's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DSM4Life
    I hear you. Listening to some of the other stories it almost makes mine seem like a cake-walk....god, i wish it was.

    What drives me nuts is when i think about calling her i say to myself no, hold back but then i say if i don't call maybe she will think i am mad at her (which i i guess i am in a way).

    I remember one time when she came over after the break up she was in my room on my bed and all i wanted to do was hold her but i held back 100% and played it off like any normal day. After 3 days, we saw each other for a talk and she started crying and said when i was on your bed that night all i wanted you to do was hold me and tell me it would be ok !!!
    YOU ARE DRIVING ME $#%$%# CRAZY!!!! . So now i am like well should i do this , no maybe i should do that. Trying to antisipate what she wants.

    Its easy , just tell me what the @$@# you want. You either want to be with me or no. Don't leave me in limbo !

    All this talking just gets me mad, i am not calling her for a while. I am in one of my good moods which equals angry. Anger is a lot easier to deal with then hurt. At this moment i just want to tell her to never F@$#@ call me again !
    ...........



    I need to eat .
    Sounds to me like she wants to send you mixed signals bro. She can't want to have her space, and want you to hold her and tell her everything will be ok at the same time.
    Like Mizfit said, best thing to do is cut off all contact for a little while, dont become a convenience to her. So many times I did the same thing, called her number and wouldnt press "Send". I even called HIS number 100 times and just wanted to tell him what he put me thru by playing a role in this. But, in the end you dont want to give them the satisfaction. You did the right thing by playing it cool, you should act like nothing bothers you even tho you are dying inside.

    Just know to turn to us or somebody bro if you start thinking too crazy, I was in that phase too.

  2. #82
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    Quote Originally Posted by D3m3nt3d

    Just know to turn to us or somebody bro if you start thinking too crazy, I was in that phase too.
    I thought about that for a split second in the beginning only when i started to combine this break up with school debt, credit card dept, not being done school etc. This was like the glue that combined all the negatives and it hit my like a ton of bricks. I don't open up to ANYONE so when i type this stuff on here itís my release. I have a sister that i can tell a lot to but sometimes i don't want to tell her everything but on the other hand it still needs to come out.

    Listening to some of the stories i can tell you guys have been through this and much more. I read how you guys explain your feelings at the time and i almost feel like you are inside of me, describing me ! It just feels good to get this stuff out and i appreciate all the kind words from everyone.

  3. #83
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    Anything we can do to help bro. To be honest, my little girl is the ONLY reason I didnt do something stupid to myself and also the guy she is with. Everyday for 2 months I woke up wanting to end him, and I had to tell myself, SHE made the decision, SHE let him step in the middle, SHE gave up everything...and believe me time will heal. I didnt believe a person when they told me that, and there may not be a day that goes by it doesnt cross your mind, but you have to learn how to not let it consume your whole life.

    Shoot me a PM if you ever need anything bro.

  4. #84
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    Well she called me tonight.

    She asked why i haven't been calling her and i told her flat out how i feel. I said i feel like you are leading me on by the things to say. I told her that we spent 3 years together so its going to take more then 3 weeks to get over this. Telling her that i can no longer come to her with things like i use to or lean on her like i always did (was getting choked up, im a bitch ) . I said i think i jsut need time to figure things out for myself.

    She said i am a best friend to her and that she still wants to talk to me everyday and tell each other how we are doing and such and i told her no. I said it can't be like that right now. She started getting upset (i think she knows the space is growing between us). I said its not fair. We can't act like nothing is happening. Things have changed and we can't turn our backs on that. She started to cry a little and we talked a little more. Then i cut it off and said i had to go to the gym (which i did) and we left it at, I will call her when i am ready. I will give it a week or so and let her feel how i felt not even being able to talk to her. I am no longer a phone call away for support right now.

    It really felt good getting my feelings out to her. We always had good communication skills which helps. We both know where we stand right now.

    ..man i had a good workout. I can hardly hold my arms up to type this $hit

  5. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by DSM4Life
    Well she called me tonight.

    She asked why i haven't been calling her and i told her flat out how i feel. I said i feel like you are leading me on by the things to say. I told her that we spent 3 years together so its going to take more then 3 weeks to get over this. Telling her that i can no longer come to her with things like i use to or lean on her like i always did (was getting choked up, im a bitch ) . I said i think i jsut need time to figure things out for myself.

    She said i am a best friend to her and that she still wants to talk to me everyday and tell each other how we are doing and such and i told her no. I said it can't be like that right now. She started getting upset (i think she knows the space is growing between us). I said its not fair. We can't act like nothing is happening. Things have changed and we can't turn our backs on that. She started to cry a little and we talked a little more. Then i cut it off and said i had to go to the gym (which i did) and we left it at, I will call her when i am ready. I will give it a week or so and let her feel how i felt not even being able to talk to her. I am no longer a phone call away for support right now.

    It really felt good getting my feelings out to her. We always had good communication skills which helps. We both know where we stand right now.

    ..man i had a good workout. I can hardly hold my arms up to type this $hit
    You did the best thing bro. Keeping in touch everyday is only going to make it harder, to her maybe not - it's never as hard when you are the one breaking it off, because you are the one who wants out.

    Give it time, dont let her have her cake and eat it too. I will say atleast she wanted to talk to you, mine cried her eyes out when I moved out, told me she loved me while I was leaving...I held her a bit. 4 days later she says dont call me anymore im seeing someone.

  6. #86
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    I honestly don't want to cut her out of my life but i do want her to feel like i do. Hopfully this will help put things into perspective for her. It did feel really good that she wanted to call me but of course i did not let that be known. Only time will tell.

  7. #87
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    Quote Originally Posted by DSM4Life
    I honestly don't want to cut her out of my life but i do want her to feel like i do. Hopfully this will help put things into perspective for her. It did feel really good that she wanted to call me but of course i did not let that be known. Only time will tell.
    I know what that's like man, when you want someone to feel how you're feeling, cause you want them to know what it's like and in some ****ed up way, let them know that THEY are responsible for it. Sometimes it can change a persons mind and make them realise just what is happening.

    I could never talk or be friends with an Ex. I dont wanna know what she's doing. For me, over is truly and utterly over.

    However mate, if you guys can work things out then good luck and look forward to the rest of your lives.

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