the fear of rejection

[stunner5000pt]

It isnt this fear that actually puts me off

its the fact that i dont look good

i know that i am not the best looking guy and i dont even have the body to make up for that... but that also hampers me

there are times that i will approach the hottest hottest girl and i will try and strike a conversation and she is completely uninterested. OK may be she didnt like me but i move on and its still the same way. I know i am being self conscious.

i ahve been told that the so called 'leagues' dont exist once you grow up but i have found that to be different

i wish i was one of those guys who could easily pull girls left and right and push them awya just as easily.. but whatever girls i have met i have had to work so hard for them while my 'better looking' buddies manage to do so much with so little effort... what is it that i am doing wrong?

Most of th girls i end up with turn out to be dead ends in what i am looking for...

before you say it ... YES i am shallow
NO i do not make it obvious that i want sex

[Foskamink]

man its a harsh world. keep in there bro!

[stunner5000pt]

it's just that i am not turning out the way i wanted to...

what i wanted to be doesnt even seem realistic

i want to be pulling the hottest sexiest girls .. the type you see and go WOW now SHE could do PORN... but i only see those types with equally as stoopid looking guys.. why couldnt i that kind of guy


why must i be an idiot and say stupid things like this??...

[JohnboyF]

welcome to the world of faizakafez

[mavsluva]

You have your health.
You have your freedom.
You have the ability to do the things that you enjoy.
You have the ability to make other people happy.
You care for people, and these people care for you.
You have some very unique gifts, and there are people out there that envy you because of these gifts.
There are women out there that would love to get to know you.
We often forget about the things that make us who were are.

Shall I continue? Try focusing on what you are and what you have, rather than frowning down upon yourself for the things that you wished that you were.

Keep your chin up.

[stunner5000pt]

You have your health.
You have your freedom.
You have the ability to do the things that you enjoy.
You have the ability to make other people happy.
You care for people, and these people care for you.
You have some very unique gifts, and there are people out there that envy you because of these gifts.
There are women out there that would love to get to know you.
We often forget about the things that make us who were are.

Shall I continue? Try focusing on what you are and what you have, rather than frowning down upon yourself for the things that you wished that you were.

Keep your chin up.

i'd rather be a good loking man whore

im already shallow i was made to be a shallow prick who got the best girls

[stunner5000pt]

i dont understand why i set my goals so high...

i expected more from myself but its my personality and shyness and my looks that hold me back

bascially everything about me

[PROTEINSHAKE]

you need to be more comfortable in your own skin bro...

you say you dont look good...in what way? if you mean physically --then get into shape!! If you mean looks wise, change it up!! your clothes, hair, somethin new & fresh to give you a new,clean slate

[stunner5000pt]

you need to be more comfortable in your own skin bro...

you say you dont look good...in what way? if you mean physically --then get into shape!! If you mean looks wise, change it up!! your clothes, hair, somethin new & fresh to give you a new,clean slate

getting in shape is taking forever

clothes i dont maek enough money to pay bills

my hair isnt growing anymore... and im only 21

maybe i should save up for plastic surgery

which will be around 2050... and ill be 65

[PROTEINSHAKE]

you gada start somewhere brother... Why is it taking long to get in shape?? you are in the best place in the world to learn about it!!! stop being so pessimistic... go from to cmon bro...turn it around...next summer will be here b4 you know it--set some fitness goals for yourself.

[DSM4Life]

It isnt this fear that actually puts me off

its the fact that i dont look good

i know that i am not the best looking guy and i dont even have the body to make up for that... but that also hampers me

there are times that i will approach the hottest hottest girl and i will try and strike a conversation and she is completely uninterested. OK may be she didnt like me but i move on and its still the same way. I know i am being self conscious.

i ahve been told that the so called 'leagues' dont exist once you grow up but i have found that to be different

i wish i was one of those guys who could easily pull girls left and right and push them awya just as easily.. but whatever girls i have met i have had to work so hard for them while my 'better looking' buddies manage to do so much with so little effort... what is it that i am doing wrong?

Most of th girls i end up with turn out to be dead ends in what i am looking for...

before you say it ... YES i am shallow
NO i do not make it obvious that i want sex

I sometimes feel the same way around women and won't even approch the girl to talk to her. Give yourself a pat on the back just for doing that.

[Hunter]

Is this gonna sound weird but you cant make anyone else happy if your not happy with yourself. People can sense confidence etc. I would just keep working towards your goals and keep moving forward. You get turned down big deal it happens to everyone except me cause I have only had 2 g/fs lol. Your approaching girls which can be hard just be yourself and let the convo flow there are very few cases in which anybody is better then anybody else remember that.

[Hackamaniac]

She could be doing porn wtf
Show them lots of cash that will make you interesting really quick..

[LawMan018]

You know what you need, you need some good pick up lines...

Is that a mirror in your pants? Cause I can see myself in em'.

Did it hurt? When you fell from Heaven.

Do you do karate? Cause your body is kickin'.

Are you tired? Cause you've been running through my mind all day.

Do you have a map? Cause I keep getting lost in your eyes.

I'm new in town. Can you give me directions to your apartment?

You must be a hell of a thief because you stole my heart from across the room.

Just use any of these pick up lines and you'll be sure to nag one!

[Hunter]

my second peice of advice is dont use any of the pick up lines mentioned by lawman018 j/k lawman but on a side note dont use them

[lucabratzi]

i can brush off girls that reject me real easy...the way i see it if im out somewere and try to spark conversation and the girl doesnt want anything to do with me thats ok...she's missin out...im not a bad lookin guy, im in descent shape, i have a good personality (funny, caring, mature, can hold convo/good listener ect..), have set goals for my future which will make me very succesful...i never brag about what my family has, cause thats were it ends, its theres not mine...so if the girl cant see my good qualities, pfft.. good, her loss...

[stunner5000pt]

my philosophy is that i should never ever settle for anything less than the best - maybe i am asking for too much from the hottest girl

but first i need to get one of these to talk back rather than ignore me or act like a damp mop when i talk to them

[stunner5000pt]

idont use pick up lines by th way ... but i do find something about them (besides you're hot) to talk about like a book theyre reading or the chalk on their ass haha

what pisses me off is when there is little fedback and they are content to just 'leave' even after makign a good impression.. maybe i didnt makea good impression who knows

incidentally i dont show that i am lacking confidnce ... i try and keep that completely under wraps either ill put on an act (which i do well sometimes) or ill just be cocky

theyre supposed to like cocky/confidence and it STILL DOESNT WORK

[DSM4Life]

my philosophy is that i should never ever settle for anything less than the best - maybe i am asking for too much from the hottest girl

but first i need to get one of these to talk back rather than ignore me or act like a damp mop when i talk to them

Also maybe you are looking at the wrong places. You keep trying at the local bars ?

[DSM4Life]

idont use pick up lines by th way ... but i do find something about them (besides you're hot) to talk about like a book theyre reading or the chalk on their ass haha

what pisses me off is when there is little fedback and they are content to just 'leave' even after makign a good impression.. maybe i didnt makea good impression who knows

incidentally i dont show that i am lacking confidnce ... i try and keep that completely under wraps either ill put on an act (which i do well sometimes) or ill just be cocky

theyre supposed to like cocky/confidence and it STILL DOESNT WORK

Try not putting on an act and be yourself.

[stunner5000pt]

Also maybe you are looking at the wrong places. You keep trying at the local bars ?

i try everywhere - bars, clubs, school, pubs, on the street, waiting for hte bus... you name it ive tried there

[whynot960]

Well the advice from mansluva is great advice you need to read it a few times and really think about it. Just think if you just found out that you had cancer and you werent going to live much longer. How then you would do anything to be in the place your in now. I know that sounds harsh but we have one life and it goes by fast real fast and before you know it you will be and old man and still unhappy and alone and then you will have wished that you had just found someone to love you as much as you love them and that is more important than having someone that is just hot.

[whynot960]

oopps double post

[stunner5000pt]

Well the advice from mansluva is great advice you need to read it a few times and really think about it. Just think if you just found out that you had cancer and you werent going to live much longer. How then you would do anything to be in the place your in now. I know that sounds harsh but we have one life and it goes by fast real fast and before you know it you will be and old man and still unhappy and alone and then you will have wished that you had just found someone to love you as much as you love them and that is more important than having someone that is just hot.

i just need to sow some wild oats... right now i ve got the oats and too many fields with no entry boards

[mavsluva]

i'd rather be a good loking man whore

im already shallow i was made to be a shallow prick who got the best girls

Oh, okay.

Good luck with that?

[Hunter]

i'd rather be a good loking man whore

im already shallow i was made to be a shallow prick who got the best girls

Probably one of the most juvenile things I have heard in a while. If you give off that kinda persona we all know why you are single.

[NOREGRETS]

Leagues do exist with pure physical attraction, some of us just are not lady killers. This doesn't mean you'll never get a women out of your league occasionally, but a majority of the time you will probably only attract women within your own league. There are many other factor that can improve your chances, such as appearance, personality, profession, etc. Don't get so hung on what you can't get or have. You need to be 100% confident about yourself before you can deal with women, most women don't dig insecure man. To get your confidence up, try picking up women in the 4-6 range. Once your comfortable with those women move to the 6-8 range and so on.

[Polska]

Looks have very little to do with getting girls. The problem is you, not your looks. Girls are very intuitive to desperation; they can smell it. The reason you're not getting the sort of girls you want is because you're putting too much emphasis on outcome dependence. Does a guy with a lot of options care at all about whether he gets the girl or not? I know guys that fitness model, are really good looking, that couldn't pull anything if their life depended on it.

On the other hand I know a guy that's average at best, is a pizza delivery driver, and pulls 9s.

[boarder034]

Okay honestly do this...dont give a ****. For a long time i was TRYING to find a girl, then i said **** it and stoped carring. Now i have an absolutely beautiful girlfriend and i am lucky as shit to have her. If a girl sees a desperate man, no girl is gonna jump on that band wagon. A confident man, that isnt fazed by them draws there attention. I know ill catch some heat from this from the girl members, but dont act dazed, and dont pay attention. go out and have a good time with your buds, and if a girl sees you havin a good time, she'll want to be apart of it.

[stunner5000pt]

Probably one of the most juvenile things I have heard in a while. If you give off that kinda persona we all know why you are single.

no kidding its juveline

its like saying water is wet...

see i dont really care outwardly i keep it all bottled up inside..

this is not how i act iwht girls... the wya i talk to you guys... its much different im a much nicer person toward and around them

if i were to be myself ... well you can imagine girls' reactions to a guy who spoke like me...

its just that a lot of people have simply pointed out tah i would never get what i want becuase of hte colour of my skin and im starting to believe that its true...

even my friends have only pulled mediocre girls.. even though they friends with the hottest ones because the hottest ones go for other guys of different leagues

bu i do like boarder's idea that i shouldnt care and you're right

recently we went to a club and we didnt even try to hit on girls and the ycame to us although they didnt look that good... its a start however.. although we didnt get a chacne to get their numbers... so i guess something went wrong hmm

i could put in a lot of time and effort with girls and i come out empty handed while others get it easier.... i m fed up of trying... and im fed up of putting effort into empty dreams

[ginkobulloba]

Dude you are asking for advice in the wrong place.

There are soooooo many resources on the net that you can study to get some game that will in turn get you laid with the kind of chicks you want. Pm me if you'd like. Or just pick up the book "The Game." That will point you in the right direction.

[collar]

i am not an expert but maybe its yourself man, thats making the women back away maybe you are going about it in the wrong way or wrong approach.
but what ever it is just keep at it and you will catch one.
I do have to say sometimes its not about if the girls looks hot or what so ever.
its about if theres any spark there, when you look at person if theres spark there or anything you will know about it.
Then you talk to them, if not for me i dont even try.

but ofcourse there are many different approaches im no expert, im sure theres sites or books.

good luck man, i trully mean that.

[Yesevil]

Women can sense desperation. If they think you don't give a sh*t that's when they start caring.

[PROTEINSHAKE]

everyone gives great advice here bro...I have found out that its ALL about your personality....."most" girls would rather have a guy with a great personality.. ---I just happen to be the total package LOL just be cool-be yourself,& plan out your timeline for getting back in great shape. I believe being in shape effects you in EVERY facet of living,women,business,attitude in general......

[Mizfit]

Confidence my dear - without it you got nothing.

I have dated guys i consider gods, and guys who mosyt would say you could do better for..

The commonality among them - They have had confidence. I can smell it a mile away and appreicate it and find it very attractive.

Stop concentrating on what you do not have and try to capitlize on what you do.

No regrets made an important point as well.. if you are only a 6, why do you expect to attract 9's? If you lack the confidence to actualyl trying to attain something greater than your level, there is no way in bloody hell they r gonna come to you.

[Mizfit]

what pisses me off is when there is little fedback and they are content to just 'leave' even after makign a good impression.. maybe i didnt makea good impression who knows

sometimes they r just being polite.. In all seriousness some women r nicer to the less attractive ones because they don't want to be cruel.

incidentally i dont show that i am lacking confidnce ... i try and keep that completely under wraps either ill put on an act (which i do well sometimes) or ill just be cocky

what you think you are giving off might not match the reality. confidence, when it is lacking is very obvious.

theyre supposed to like cocky/confidence and it STILL DOESNT WORK

Omly when it is real and not a pretense someone is putting on.. there is something very hot about a confident guy.. Confidence is not something someone can fake. The only way u can fake it is if you are realyl good looking it will be easily to look over because of the looks quality.

[Mizfit]

...

its just that a lot of people have simply pointed out tah i would never get what i want becuase of hte colour of my skin and im starting to believe that its true...

I have no idea what colour your skin is.. but being from Toronto myself.. i'm not sure that matters much as alot of chicks date all nationalities.. Sounds like a cop out.

...
even my friends have only pulled mediocre girls.. even though they friends with the hottest ones because the hottest ones go for other guys of different leagues

Just wondering who you are to define a woman as mediocre when you have already said your not the hottest guy.. from your posts i kinda get the idea that your average looking.. Doesn't that mean you will attract Average looking women and that is what you should aim for.

...
recently we went to a club and we didnt even try to hit on girls and the ycame to us although they didnt look that good... its a start however.. although we didnt get a chacne to get their numbers... so i guess something went wrong hmm

If i want a guy to have my number.. he will get it. They obviously didn't.

[Flagg]

Not to hijack this thread but do you consider yourself a "modern woman" Misfit? In otherwords, would YOU approach a guy you were attracted to or do you let guys come on to you?

[Mizfit]

Not to hijack this thread but do you consider yourself a "modern woman" Misfit? In otherwords, would YOU approach a guy you were attracted to or do you let guys come on to you?

Never apporached a guy in my life..

Has nothing to do with being modern.. but guess so far in my life it hasn't been necessary

[boarder034]

I know this sounds childish but mizfits right...THe first night i hooked up with my girl, she told me to call her as soon as i got home, takes me 10 minutes to get home, and she knows that...so i called her an hour and a half later. See i know this seems werid but ive noticed if you give women what they want, they really dont want it anymore. Be confident like everyone is saying. Who wants to hang out with someone depressed? You wouldnt walk up to a girl if she looked like a bundle of shit would you ? NO, and neither would a girl. So go out, get a hair cut, hit the gym and extra night a week, go out on the weekends, get sloshed and have a good time with your buddies, if bitches come up, say hi, but let your other friends be more obnoxious and let them run their ears off talking... then theyll notice that confident guy...that didnt annoy the shit outta them. And be funny, THANK god im funny, cause im certainly not the best looking lol, but making a girl laugh is huge. It changes there mood from you know sad to happy, which means alot to a women. Trust me, i won my gfs heart by making her laugh all the time...oh and the great sexx too....