My Daughter Jazzy

**Kale** · 02-14-2007, 01:11 AM

Guys

Since I spend a lot of time here and see you guys as my second family I need to share this with you. Today is already St Valentines Day here in Asia but today is also the 9th Anniversary of my daughters death at the hands of a Brain Tumor.

It still feels like yesterday that she died in my arms all those years ago and it will always feels that way. I dont want sympathy, the reason I am telling you all about this is that I never want here to be forgotten. Even at three and a half when she died she had touched a lot of people, she was a very special kid.

This is a web page I created www.jazzywren.com , both as a memorial to her but also to help other parents of kids who are going through the same experience.

**STYLE74** · 02-14-2007, 01:30 AM

Kale she is an Angel and my prayers go out to you and your family at this difficult time.

**dece870717** · 02-14-2007, 01:31 AM

My father died from a brain tumor when I was about 14, and I was reading over how she died on the site and that breathing thing at the end, my dad did the same thing when he passed away.

**Kale** · 02-14-2007, 01:34 AM

Originally Posted by dece870717

My father died from a brain tumor when I was about 14, and I was reading over how she died on the site and that breathing thing at the end, my dad did the same thing when he passed away.

Yes the breathing thing was truly amazing. It was such a change it scared the hell out of my wife and I and when it stopped we knew she was gone.

**l2elapse** · 02-14-2007, 01:34 AM

very sorry Kale, my heart is with you

***perfectbeast2001*** · 02-14-2007, 01:36 AM

Very sory for your loss mate. I said a little prayer for you guys.

**dece870717** · 02-14-2007, 01:41 AM

Originally Posted by Kale

Yes the breathing thing was truly amazing. It was such a change it scared the hell out of my wife and I and when it stopped we knew she was gone.

My father died in our home, and I remember my sisters and my mom were afraid to sleep upstairs so we all slept in the basement. He had it for about 8 years, and first surgery helped pro long his life quite a bit and had to take lots of medications and then he had to go for another surgery and came back with a slightly paralyzed right arm. About a month before he died it was the worst, you had to hand feed him, he needed to wear a diaper, he couldnt do anything on his own it was horrible, my mom was hoping he would get better and we thought he would because the day before he died he seemed to be eating more and seemed to get physically better and then it just ended.

**Xtralarg** · 02-14-2007, 01:49 AM

Thats the first thing I can ever remember reading that has brought a tear to my eye!

I have a friend whos daughter fought the same battle. My thoughts are with you all.

**cj1capp** · 02-14-2007, 03:03 AM

she was so beautiful ! Thank you for sharing the pictures I have two little girls and this had me crying.

**cj1capp** · 02-14-2007, 03:10 AM

I don't know how you made it I think I would have gone insane you and your family are very beautiful I hope the every one is dealing with the loss in a positive manner.
All i can say is God bless you and your entire family.

**Booz** · 02-14-2007, 03:37 AM

i remember this last year mate,again my thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.......................
such a young age.....................

**SMAN12b** · 02-14-2007, 03:54 AM

Damnnnn you really know how to make a man cry !!! My heart goes out to you Kale!! She is a beautiful girl QQ That has to be the hardest thing in the world to go through, because you never really get done going through it!!

Lot's of Valentines love goes out to You and especially Jazzy

**Bruce000** · 02-14-2007, 04:42 AM

Wow She is so beautiful. Don't have any kids. So I cant even begin to know what you went through. Good to See your celebrating her life.

**gixxerboy1** · 02-14-2007, 07:23 AM

She is adorable. I couldn't make it through just the pictures with out crying. You looked like you guys did a lot of stuff together. I'm sure you have a lot of good memories.

**Hunter** · 02-14-2007, 07:30 AM

Gorgous little girl kale.

**king6** · 02-14-2007, 07:39 AM

Wow, beautiful web site. I haven't been that choked up in a long time.

**ebjack** · 02-14-2007, 07:42 AM

Respect, brother for Jazzy, you and your family

//tears wellin up through all the test in me

**goodcents** · 02-14-2007, 10:36 AM

I looked all through the site and it was tough

The funeral part was really sad

Would you want to answer personal questions about the ordeal or would you like to keep that private? (I can respect either choice)

**mavsluva** · 02-14-2007, 10:56 AM

Originally Posted by Kale

Guys

Since I spend a lot of time here and see you guys as my second family I need to share this with you. Today is already St Valentines Day here in Asia but today is also the 9th Anniversary of my daughters death at the hands of a Brain Tumor.

It still feels like yesterday that she died in my arms all those years ago and it will always feels that way. I dont want sympathy, the reason I am telling you all about this is that I never want here to be forgotten. Even at three and a half when she died she had touched a lot of people, she was a very special kid.

This is a web page I created www.jazzywren.com , both as a memorial to her but also to help other parents of kids who are going through the same experience.

Hey Kale,

My wife and I are running in the AT&T Austin Texas Marathon this weekend and we will run in memory of her. I'm assuming that you have pictures of her on your website. After reading this, my wife wants to make us some t-shirts to wear with her picture on it if you don't mind?

My wife and I do these types of events to raise money for the Children's Brain Tumor Foundation of the Southwest. We get people and businesses to sponsor us and we then take that money and write a check at the end of the year to Cooks Children's Hospital in Fort Worth, TX for children's brain cancer research.

David

**prncezzml** · 02-14-2007, 11:21 AM

She looks like a little angel, thanks for sharing, it reminds me how precious life is. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

**Kale** · 02-14-2007, 01:03 PM

Originally Posted by mavsluva

Hey Kale,

My wife and I are running in the AT&T Austin Texas Marathon this weekend and we will run in memory of her. I'm assuming that you have pictures of her on your website. After reading this, my wife wants to make us some t-shirts to wear with her picture on it if you don't mind?

My wife and I do these types of events to raise money for the Children's Brain Tumor Foundation of the Southwest. We get people and businesses to sponsor us and we then take that money and write a check at the end of the year to Cooks Children's Hospital in Fort Worth, TX for children's brain cancer research.

David

David

That would be awesome man. I have had people do that kind of thing before. You have no idea how much that would mean to me, I am choking up here !!! If you do do it please make sure youe send me some pictures of you guys.

**mavsluva** · 02-14-2007, 01:04 PM

Originally Posted by Kale

David

That would be awesome man. I have had people do that kind of thing before. You have no idea how much that would mean to me, I am choking up here !!! If you do do it please make sure youe send me some pictures of you guys.

Consider it done. I'll mail you a shirt when it's all said and done.

I'll need her spirit to get me through this event because I do NOT train for marathons!

**Kale** · 02-14-2007, 01:05 PM

Originally Posted by goodcents

I looked all through the site and it was tough

The funeral part was really sad

Would you want to answer personal questions about the ordeal or would you like to keep that private? (I can respect either choice)

Dude you can ask any questions you want. One of the things I do now is talk about the whole experience to councellors at a place called Very Special Kids in Melbourne who are undergoing training to help families that are in similar situations to what we went through, and I am happy to do it publicly.

**Kale** · 02-14-2007, 01:06 PM

I want to thank you all for your kind words, its been a tough day and your thoughts have helped me a lot

**Kale** · 02-14-2007, 01:08 PM

Originally Posted by mavsluva

Consider it done. I'll mail you a shirt when it's all said and done.

I'll need her spirit to get me through this event because I do NOT train for marathons!

That will be great. She will get you through it I am sure. Good luck David I will be thinking of you guys !!!

**spywizard** · 02-14-2007, 01:11 PM

Thoughts and prayers for you and your family. Wow, really choked me up. Thanks for sharing this with us..

**StoneGRMI** · 02-14-2007, 01:45 PM

Originally Posted by Booz

i remember this last year mate,again my thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.......................
such a young age.....................

I remember it as well. Thanks for sharing again, Kale. I'm sure she's in a wonderful place.

**goodcents** · 02-14-2007, 01:58 PM

Originally Posted by Kale

Dude you can ask any questions you want. One of the things I do now is talk about the whole experience to councellors at a place called Very Special Kids in Melbourne who are undergoing training to help families that are in similar situations to what we went through, and I am happy to do it publicly.

Do you feel the experience led up to the seperation with your wife? ( I ask this one because I know a woman who's child was killed in a bus/car accident and it strained the marriage )

Did you pretty well know her death was coming?

Did you blame yourself at all? (it's obvious it's wasn't your fault but alot of people feel blame when someone dies)

Did this experience help lead you to move to asia?

Again, thanks for the responses, this day will just suck each year and not much you take from it

(except the pride that only you can feel knowing that you did everything you could and that you will see her again some day

) The woman who's teenage son was killed had him die on the first day of the school year and within a week of her birthday. She won't even celebrate it till sept.

**abcde** · 02-14-2007, 02:04 PM

Your daughter is precious. Bless her little soul.

**goodcents** · 02-14-2007, 02:13 PM

Kale, I don't know if you've heard Vince Niell's (from motley crue) story, but his daughter died of cancer too at a very young age and I watched the special on mtv. It was sad with the footage of them together and it just got me to thinking about it again

All we can do is enjoy the time we have together and live like we may not see them again

**MotoLifter** · 02-14-2007, 02:20 PM

A prayer for you and yours Kale... I went to the site, and it teared me up a bit. Mav had a great idea. If its cool, I would like to put in a race for her and the rest of your family when the season starts up again. I'll send ya the Jersey after the race.

**audis4** · 02-14-2007, 02:30 PM

so sorry for your loss!! such a sad story...just know that you will see her soon again

**WelshWarrior** · 02-14-2007, 02:37 PM

Wow, I'm fortunate never to have experienced anything as catastrophic in my life, but my eyes are prickling as I read your experience.

Your a good man and I respect the power in your words.

SVTMuscle* · 02-14-2007, 02:45 PM

Man everyone else pretty said it. The world works in messed up way man, your way to great of a guy to loose a daughter like that and an innocent little girl that didn't put a sin to the world

**goodcents** · 02-14-2007, 02:50 PM

Don't know if it helps Kale, but you don't want your daughter staring down from a better place and seeing her daddy sad when she is no longer suffering. She would want you to celebrate her arrival instead of departure

Now put on a smile for her and enjoy the day not for the sadness but for the pride you have for having her as your little girl even if it was cut short for a little while

**UpstateTank** · 02-14-2007, 02:55 PM

so sorry to hear about your loss kale...

**WelshWarrior** · 02-14-2007, 03:20 PM

Some good bros here on this board.

**C_Bino** · 02-14-2007, 03:23 PM

Kale my friend, memories are the greatest thing and this is how she lives on. I know you dont ask for sympathy and I truly believe this really is the last thing you want. So what I will offer is the chance for you to know both YOU and JAZZY are very special. I know this because off of this board and into my own life you guys come into my head. There are some people that you know are just good people and who somehow get to you or you feel something for even if you cant explain it. And believe me when I tell you this is true for you and your daughter. I remember first going to your website such a long time ago. Since then I cant tell you the number of times you guys come into my thoughts.

So just ask Im sure Jazzy is still happy knowing that she isnt forgotten, you should be to (even at this especially sad time of the year) knowing you also are always in the thoughts of those who care about you.

Also, Mavs if you make those shirts let me know if you can make an extra. Im gonna shoot you the $ so I can wear it in the gym and take a pic of me bench pressing more than Kale can and use it as my avy.

Sorry Kale, you didnt think I could make an entire post without makin at shot at ya did you?

Much love.

**C_Bino** · 02-14-2007, 03:23 PM

But for real. I would love to wear that shirt when Im working out. Will give me the drive I need.

**Kale** · 02-14-2007, 05:00 PM

Originally Posted by goodcents

Do you feel the experience led up to the seperation with your wife? ( I ask this one because I know a woman who's child was killed in a bus/car accident and it strained the marriage )

Absolutely, it has never been the same since. We are not actually separated, we basically live as house mates for the good of my 14 yo son.

Did you pretty well know her death was coming?

I think I knew the minute I looked at the first CT scans that she was not going to make it. The a couple of weeks later after I had done some research on the web I knew it would take a miracle for her to survive.

Did you blame yourself at all? (it's obvious it's wasn't your fault but alot of people feel blame when someone dies)

All the time, my wife keeps pointing out to me that very thing, she has since found Buddhism and is completely at peace with the whole thing but for me it will eat me for the rest of my life that I didnt do enough to try and save her

Did this experience help lead you to move to asia?

No it really had nothing to do with it. We had Jazzy created and we actually took her with us as we couldnt bare to leave her behind so she is not sitting at the foot of our bed in Singapore

Again, thanks for the responses, this day will just suck each year and not much you take from it

(except the pride that only you can feel knowing that you did everything you could and that you will see her again some day

) The woman who's teenage son was killed had him die on the first day of the school year and within a week of her birthday. She won't even celebrate it till sept.

I will answer the questions above in bold. Feel free to follow up if you want. I understand completely how that poor woman is feeling, to lose a child is the most devastating thing that can happen to you as a parent