Toughts of suicide after unresolve back pain

**sonar1234** · 04-02-2007, 02:39 PM

I did it all and today yet again my pain comes back i been having back pain for 6 years now and i cant train, the only thing i can do is walk.

I did everything, went to every therapist and i am sad to say that i am thinking about ending my life.

I am 34 years old and use to be involved in martial arts, and weight training but now i cant do anything anymore life is boring and its chronic pain day in and day out.

I injured myself doing squats and deadlifts.

I got some x rays to a chiro i see right now and i have no athritis and no sign of disk degeneration or hernia.

Yet the pain comes back.

**mavsluva** · 04-02-2007, 02:43 PM

I'm about to PM you with my info. And feel free to contact me ANYTIME you need/want to.

**Testsubject** · 04-02-2007, 02:43 PM

woah take it easy man, dont be talkin crazy shit like that, ****, back pain is a really shitty deal, but not something to end your life over, bro.

**AnabolicErick** · 04-02-2007, 02:48 PM

damn dude, i feel sorry for you man life is not worth ending for back pain man. i am sure there are people who care about you and love you.

BG · 04-02-2007, 02:48 PM

You need to see a specialist, do you have insurance? Stay strong buddy!!

**Testsubject** · 04-02-2007, 02:49 PM

Originally Posted by AnabolicErick

damn dude, i feel sorry for you man life is not worth ending for back pain man. i am sure there are people who care about you and love you.

yes think about your close friends and family members, suicide is a very selfish thing to do, and its just not an option bro.

**Beefkake31** · 04-02-2007, 02:50 PM

Hey man when you say life is boring, that is a good sign of depression so please at least go see a doctor (psychiatrist) they might help you and regardless of the pain you might feel better mood wise and towards life and even learn to think positive. This is nothing to end your life over man, especially if you say you can walk then it can't be to the point where it debilitates you that you can't walk. So I think it is a depression thing that has built up over the years probably because of this back pain so please go see the psychiatrist. There is a lot to live for man and our problems are nothing, NOTHING compared to other parts of the world, in fact we are spoiled so please do what I said and give it time, it can only go up from here and this feeling you have is temporary. I want to keep hearing from you on this thread as well.

**BITTAPART2** · 04-02-2007, 02:51 PM

you just cant even think about that bro. you absolutely cannot do that.

**QuieTSToRM33** · 04-02-2007, 02:53 PM

Suicide is for the weak. Stay strong and you will get through this.

**Testsubject** · 04-02-2007, 02:53 PM

bigungs and beefcake are right man.

**sonar1234** · 04-02-2007, 02:59 PM

I been everywhere guys everywhere, osteopath, chiro, massage therapist, acuponcutre, and more.

I have to go see a doctor but the thing is he is going to give me pills and i dont want that.

Life has been very hard since 2006 lost my dad to cancer, my favorite pet cat found dead on my bed, my mother is depressive and that on going back pain.

I really think that life sucks and if its a test well it really sucks has well, i never been so depressed in my life.

**Testsubject** · 04-02-2007, 03:03 PM

Originally Posted by sonar1234

I been everywhere guys everywhere, osteopath, chiro, massage therapist, acuponcutre, and more.

I have to go see a doctor but the thing is he is going to give me pills and i dont want that.

Life has been very hard since 2006 lost my dad to cancer, my favorite pet cat found dead on my bed, my mother is depressive and that on going back pain.

I really think that life sucks and if its a test well it really sucks has well, i never been so depressed in my life.

Thats exactlly why you need to go see a doctor, about your mental heath, not you physicall heath, they can give you medication to help you deal with your depression and they can listen to your feelings and help you along this rough part of your life, i think medication is a much better way to go than suicide brother, hang in there.

**number twelve** · 04-02-2007, 03:03 PM

damn bro this is terrible to hear. i hope you can get through it. are you taking any pain meds?

**Hellmaskbanned** · 04-02-2007, 03:06 PM

Yeah I agree life does suck. But theres more to life than just weights.
Sounds like you need to find a hobby. Fishing, golfing etc.
Also, you should see a doc about your "mental state".

In the news today : Man kills himself over lower back pain reporters say:
^^^^^
Come on now....don't be that guy.

**sonar1234** · 04-02-2007, 03:08 PM

Yeah i guess i will go see a real doctor and stop wasting my time with so called idiots, my last chiro was a very cool guy charged me only 35$ for 3 adjustments per week but i guess he is stuck in a root has well.

**daytrader** · 04-02-2007, 03:13 PM

Damn bro, i ****in feel for ya man, i would prob be the same way if i couldnt train, let me ask ya so the rest of us can learn, when you say the pain is attributed to squats and deads,,, was their a particular instance, bad form? heavy weight? just wondering if you could eleborate more because 6months let alone 6 years is just shitty bro

**nbkandrew13** · 04-02-2007, 03:14 PM

dude felt your pain along time ago i broke my neck c3 took along time to get over couldnt do the things i wanted and yeah it sucks got addicted to meth oxycotin everything you can but i got straight and stayed straight(4years now and i know god doesnt give us anything more then we can handle so maybe the reason i had top go througfh all that was to help some people along the wAY, dont quit everyday above ground is a good day. i bet every person in a wheelchair wishes they could feel that pain. dnt quit keep your head up

**ronan the barbarian** · 04-02-2007, 03:15 PM

please please speak to a doc or someone,

iv lost 2 very close friends and nearly an uncle to suicide,and i wished id known cus i would of told them the same.

quietstorm33,dont be a mug,suicide is classed as murder and generally speaking isnt done by the weak,and suicide is only a last resort for people who are having particular problems they cant deal with.

i really honestly and truelly hope you seek help and get it.

good luck i wish i could do or say more but im sure there are people on here that are more qualified than me to do that

**Beefkake31** · 04-02-2007, 03:17 PM

Finally, please do, I'm surprised you have not gone until now. And when you say you don't want to take pills, why? Do you feel weak if you take them? There is nothing negative to feel when having to take a pill, you might need it right now in your life. And you say you have never been depressed like this, I know exactly what's going on man, obviously I am no doctor so that's why I am telling you to go see one (and I mean call today) but I am sure you have a case of clinical depression and a majority of it coming from the pain in your back and not being to do certain things and also the women that meant the most to you, your mother. So it is understandable man, just give it time and go see the doctor, I promise you things will start looking up and you will look back on this and say what the hell was I thinking.

**nbkandrew13** · 04-02-2007, 03:17 PM

go watch you favvorite funny movie , itll be an instant fix

**novastepp** · 04-02-2007, 04:04 PM

i have chronic back pain from shermann's kyphosis... and i'm 21.

don't give up. i don't know if you are religious or not, but those who suffer and endure pain are filled with God's graces. and think about those close to you.

i promise you, something, sometime... will make you happier than you've ever been in your life, and you'll look back at these times and be grateful that you chose life.

**SMAN12b** · 04-02-2007, 04:12 PM

What exactly is wrong with your back??

I am in the same boat as you, and have had two back surgeries. I did martial arts for 23 years, it was my life, now I can't. I used to squat 600lbs, now it hurts to squat 135.

I had to make all kinds of adjustments to my workout routine, but I still workout and do what I can

Anybody can roll over and play dead when the world deals them a shitty hand....I won't even get into my crappy life right now....but it takes a better person to look past the bad stuff and still find a reason to get up everyday....

YOU CAN DO IT !!!

**king6** · 04-02-2007, 04:29 PM

You might want to consider some anti depressants, such as zoloft. But speak with your doctor first.

**Hoggage_54** · 04-02-2007, 04:32 PM

You can also try David D. Burns' book "Feeling Good" if you have the time to read.

**daytrader** · 04-02-2007, 04:32 PM

Originally Posted by SMAN12B

What exactly is wrong with your back??

I am in the same boat as you, and have had two back surgeries. I did martial arts for 23 years, it was my life, now I can't. I used to squat 600lbs, now it hurts to squat 135.

I had to make all kinds of adjustments to my workout routine, but I still workout and do what I can

Anybody can roll over and play dead when the world deals them a shitty hand....I won't even get into my crappy life right now....but it takes a better person to look past the bad stuff and still find a reason to get up everyday....

YOU CAN DO IT !!!

Yup, **** im 21 and loveee training powerlifting...but i just wasnt built to do it...tall.lanky,stiff build... i do a deadlift with 400lbs and text book form,, and my back is gonna flare up guarenteed... im just adjusted my workouts as usual and i think im growing better now than ever

BG · 04-02-2007, 06:27 PM

Originally Posted by sonar1234

I been everywhere guys everywhere, osteopath, chiro, massage therapist, acuponcutre, and more.

I have to go see a doctor but the thing is he is going to give me pills and i dont want that.

Life has been very hard since 2006 lost my dad to cancer, my favorite pet cat found dead on my bed, my mother is depressive and that on going back pain.

I really think that life sucks and if its a test well it really sucks has well, i never been so depressed in my life.

I hear ya pal, I never had a dad, my mom died of cancer in front of me at 15, my brother in a motorcycle accident 4 days before my 18th birthday, and when I started to turn my life around (because I went the wrong direction after all that shit) my niece was born with the 4th rarest disease in the world, had blood tranfusions for a year until they figured out what it was now she's on pretazone and swole up like a tic being picked on by other kids. Not everyones lifes are picnics and ballgames, some of us have the shit end of the stick......................but theres always other peoplethat have it way worst. Pop some pills if you have to and put a smile on for your mom, be happy you still have her.Ide give anything to her my mom say my name one more time.

**sonar1234** · 04-02-2007, 06:28 PM

Bad forms caused my pain, i tried training last Saturday and did some close pulley rows bang the L7 jammed and i had to go to the chiro to get it adjusted.

**QuieTSToRM33** · 04-02-2007, 07:33 PM

Originally Posted by ronan the barbarian

suicide is only a last resort for people who are having particular problems they cant deal with.

exactly .... the weak

**Kennedy** · 04-02-2007, 07:38 PM

You really need to see a back SURGEON. Stay strong bud.

**maxex** · 04-02-2007, 07:46 PM

Originally Posted by sonar1234

I did it all and today yet again my pain comes back i been having back pain for 6 years now and i cant train, the only thing i can do is walk.

I did everything, went to every therapist and i am sad to say that i am thinking about ending my life.

I am 34 years old and use to be involved in martial arts, and weight training but now i cant do anything anymore life is boring and its chronic pain day in and day out.

I injured myself doing squats and deadlifts.

I got some x rays to a chiro i see right now and i have no athritis and no sign of disk degeneration or hernia.

Yet the pain comes back.

Man up bro...sounds to me like you are leeting the pain control you, and using it as an excuse to feel sorry for yourself. Don't feel sorry for yourself, there are millions of peopl out there who have it worse than you.
I was in your shoes once, I thought i would be dead by the time I was 23 at one point.
If youthink the pain will never go away and you have no hope then it wont go away, you have to fight bro. ANd I know it's not easy.

There is a cure for you out there somewhere, you just have to stop feeling sorry for yourself and go get it, it isnt going to come find you.

**Act of God** · 04-02-2007, 09:28 PM

Originally Posted by sonar1234

Yeah i guess i will go see a real doctor and stop wasting my time with so called idiots, my last chiro was a very cool guy charged me only 35$ for 3 adjustments per week but i guess he is stuck in a root has well.

Hey man, you MUST get to a medical doctor. A lot of these alternative medicine types are mostly scammers (perhaps my view is tainted because we have MD's in the family). Get to a good orthopedist and let's get to the bottom of this.

**Superhuman** · 04-02-2007, 10:15 PM

GO SEE A GOOD, QUALITY HYPNOTIST!!! NO SHIT lots of back pain is caused by unresolved issues in your subconscious.

this guy is the BEST hypnotist in the world maybe you can ask him about it. He has a CD program you can listen to called Pain Management I think. Check it out bro, I am serious

link to order the CD
http://www.travisfox.net/Store/ProdDetl.aspx?ID=36

link to download MP3 version
http://www.travisfox.net/Store/ProdDetl.aspx?ID=13

**Hellmaskbanned** · 04-02-2007, 10:18 PM

Originally Posted by Superhuman

GO SEE A GOOD, QUALITY HYPNOTIST!!! NO SHIT lots of back pain is caused by unresolved issues in your subconscious.

this guy is the BEST hypnotist in the world maybe you can ask him about it. He has a CD program you can listen to called Pain Management I think. Check it out bro, I am serious

link to order the CD
http://www.travisfox.net/Store/ProdDetl.aspx?ID=36

link to download MP3 version
http://www.travisfox.net/Store/ProdDetl.aspx?ID=13

Yes Indeed. I've heard about this aswell.

**Red Ketchup** · 04-02-2007, 11:04 PM

I'd say seek surgical medical help for your back ASAP, and if push comes to shove, take the medication they give you UNTIL a better solution comes along. Consider the pain medication a temporary solution.

I'm no back specialist but as some of the dinosaurs who have been around here for a while know, I had my own brush with suicide a while ago. It was because of a messed up surgical procedure (my eyes got messed up) and I couldn't go on living with the consequences and sank in a deep depression.

Fortuntely with help from my friends and family (from support and cheering me up, to discretely removing all my guns from my house) I made it thru the depression alive, and managed to find an acceptable medical solution for my eyes.

And if you want to keep training, go see a sports medecine or sports physio specialist to get a program thats safe for your back. I agree it won't be perfect, but it IS a small victory, and you climb out of depression one small victory at the time.

Red

**taiboxa** · 04-02-2007, 11:07 PM

I usually never comment in a thread like this for there is very little one can do on the internet to help but…

YOU ARE A BLAZING IDIOT! You think u have it bad because ur back hurts and u cant lift!? WTF that is PATHETIC… and here, let me tell you why.

AT my gym, EVERY DAY from 11am to 1pm there is a kid he comes in .. EVERY ****ING DAY! And guess what, he is in a wheel chair… he has Muscular dystrophy and will be lucky to make it to 40 plus he can barely control his fvcking stick on his electric wheel chair to move around... due to the fact he shakes SO BAD! Yet he is there EVERY DAY for 2 to even 3hrs.

He moves his wheel chair up to a machine he wishes to use... even though he struggles he still manages to get out of his wheel chair, into the machine he has chosen and performs his chosen exercise… and he does it WELL. His head will be shaking, his feet will be kicking but what ever muscle he is working... He WORKS IT W/ CONTROL!

I have spoken w/ this kid (young man) on many occasions.. GREAT GUY, very intelligent, especially when it comes to physiology and the like and is apparently more of a man than you. Here let me give you an example. One day when he was leaving the gym after his 2+hr training session he was trying to open the door by him self (and he was having a bich of a time). I offered to help him and guess what he said to me... "No thank you I can manage." and after another 3 or 4 minutes he was able to get the door open and be on his marry way... to wait out side for the city transportation to come pick him up.

So just when you think u have it bad enough to end ur own life and hurt all those who care about you more than you could ever possibly imagine... I want you to think about this person I have spoken of and at least strive to be half the person he is, for even though he is already sentenced to die at a young age… giving up is the LAST THING on his mind. So u know what I could personally care less about you offing ur self, its those you hurt around you I feel sorry for, but hey if you can think real hard and can not come up w/ a single name of a person who gives more than a flying fvck about you… go ahead… play in traffic and clean out our gene pool.

**Hellmaskbanned** · 04-02-2007, 11:17 PM

Originally Posted by taiboxa

I usually never comment in a thread like this for there is very little one can do on the internet to help but…

YOU ARE A BLAZING IDIOT! You think u have it bad because ur back hurts and u cant lift!? WTF that is PATHETIC… and here, let me tell you why.

AT my gym, EVERY DAY from 11am to 1pm there is a kid he comes in .. EVERY ****ING DAY! And guess what, he is in a wheel chair… he has Muscular dystrophy and will be lucky to make it to 40 plus he can barely control his fvcking stick on his electric wheel chair to move around... due to the fact he shakes SO BAD! Yet he is there EVERY DAY for 2 to even 3hrs.

He moves his wheel chair up to a machine he wishes to use... even though he struggles he still manages to get out of his wheel chair, into the machine he has chosen and performs his chosen exercise… and he does it WELL. His head will be shaking, his feet will be kicking but what ever muscle he is working... He WORKS IT W/ CONTROL!

I have spoken w/ this kid (young man) on many occasions.. GREAT GUY, very intelligent, especially when it comes to physiology and the like and is apparently more of a man than you. Here let me give you an example. One day when he was leaving the gym after his 2+hr training session he was trying to open the door by him self (and he was having a bich of a time). I offered to help him and guess what he said to me... "No thank you I can manage." and after another 3 or 4 minutes he was able to get the door open and be on his marry way... to wait out side for the city transportation to come pick him up.

So just when you think u have it bad enough to end ur own life and hurt all those who care about you more than you could ever possibly imagine... I want you to think about this person I have spoken of and at least strive to be half the person he is, for even though he is already sentenced to die at a young age… giving up is the LAST THING on his mind. So u know what I could personally care less about you offing ur self, its those you hurt around you I feel sorry for, but hey if you can think real hard and can not come up w/ a single name of a person who gives more than a flying fvck about you… go ahead… play in traffic and clean out our gene pool.

That was quite touching actually. People like that (young man) amaze me and make me realize the mind and body can overcome more than most believe if actually put to test.

Oh and wait....tai actually typed a paragraph without grammatical errors or funny puns. I'm sensing an emotttioonnnaaallllll raaaannnnttttt.

**chest6** · 04-02-2007, 11:54 PM

Yep, Tai there is a girl that is the same way that works out at my gym. She walks with a walker and appears to have her left leg about 10inches-1 foot longer than the other and tries to manage as well

**zodiac666** · 04-03-2007, 12:17 AM

life will throw all types of pain at you but you will also have some pleasurable times. hardly anyone's life is easy, even people who pretend to be strong all the time will be weak at times. just worry about the things you have control over and try to maximise your pleasurable times. keep your diet under control and workout what little you can, and try to get out and do things with people who care about you.

**Beefkake31** · 04-03-2007, 12:32 AM

Originally Posted by taiboxa

I usually never comment in a thread like this for there is very little one can do on the internet to help but…

YOU ARE A BLAZING IDIOT! You think u have it bad because ur back hurts and u cant lift!? WTF that is PATHETIC… and here, let me tell you why.

AT my gym, EVERY DAY from 11am to 1pm there is a kid he comes in .. EVERY ****ING DAY! And guess what, he is in a wheel chair… he has Muscular dystrophy and will be lucky to make it to 40 plus he can barely control his fvcking stick on his electric wheel chair to move around... due to the fact he shakes SO BAD! Yet he is there EVERY DAY for 2 to even 3hrs.

He moves his wheel chair up to a machine he wishes to use... even though he struggles he still manages to get out of his wheel chair, into the machine he has chosen and performs his chosen exercise… and he does it WELL. His head will be shaking, his feet will be kicking but what ever muscle he is working... He WORKS IT W/ CONTROL!

I have spoken w/ this kid (young man) on many occasions.. GREAT GUY, very intelligent, especially when it comes to physiology and the like and is apparently more of a man than you. Here let me give you an example. One day when he was leaving the gym after his 2+hr training session he was trying to open the door by him self (and he was having a bich of a time). I offered to help him and guess what he said to me... "No thank you I can manage." and after another 3 or 4 minutes he was able to get the door open and be on his marry way... to wait out side for the city transportation to come pick him up.

So just when you think u have it bad enough to end ur own life and hurt all those who care about you more than you could ever possibly imagine... I want you to think about this person I have spoken of and at least strive to be half the person he is, for even though he is already sentenced to die at a young age… giving up is the LAST THING on his mind. So u know what I could personally care less about you offing ur self, its those you hurt around you I feel sorry for, but hey if you can think real hard and can not come up w/ a single name of a person who gives more than a flying fvck about you… go ahead… play in traffic and clean out our gene pool.

That was a great post however, the thing people don't realize, is that this guy is like this because of his mind not his back. He is suffering from depression and it's not that "im sad, something happened" type of depression, it's clinical depression. And it could even be something a lot less worse than what he is going through and he still might not want to live. So yes while I do agree it is pathetic what he is saying because his back hurts he wants to end his life. But that is not the case so I don't think it is pathetic, more than likely his neurons are misfiring and the chemicals in his brain aren't really balanced and this is why he is like this, sometimes it can happen for a reason, sometimes for no reason at all. Just wanted to throw in my .02 cents.

**taiboxa** · 04-03-2007, 05:54 AM

Originally Posted by Beefkake31

That was a great post however, the thing people don't realize, is that this guy is like this because of his mind not his back. He is suffering from depression and it's not that "im sad, something happened" type of depression, it's clinical depression. And it could even be something a lot less worse than what he is going through and he still might not want to live. So yes while I do agree it is pathetic what he is saying because his back hurts he wants to end his life. But that is not the case so I don't think it is pathetic, more than likely his neurons are misfiring and the chemicals in his brain aren't really balanced and this is why he is like this, sometimes it can happen for a reason, sometimes for no reason at all. Just wanted to throw in my .02 cents.

Its true, that the majority of all statements made dealing w/ suicide coincide with some sort of "chemical imballance", yet there is always an underlying issue from which the thought originates from and manifests its self to become a more prominant issue. I, myself have seen far to many scenerios where people always tend to use "chemicals" as an out when their cry for attention via "suicide'' is not accepted as they wished.