Gym idiots :) FUN

**doolo** · 05-17-2007, 05:06 PM

This thread should be fun and a good place to vent a bit. I dont wanna hear all this vegan mumbojumbo about just letting people be and not letting things bother you. Only good solid complaints and making fun of typical gym idiots please.

So theres this one dude in the gym we call "Tippy". Hes about 260 pure fat, 6'4" tall and prolly 40-50 yrs old. We call him tippy cause no matter what exercise your doing and no matter how amazing your physique is he will always come up to you and give you tips on how to work out.

His warm-up consists of lying down in the bench press position and rotating some 2lb dumbells. Then he throws 225lb on the bench does it a few times, takes about a 10 minute break walking around telling everyone how to workout. Then he puts 315lb on the bench press and does it about 2 times bouncing it off his chest like hes trying to cave it in. Then, another 10 minute break and some machine presses. Thats his workout, the only one ive ever seen him do.

Every single time i squat hes in there telling me to pick a spot on the roof and stare at it so i dont lose my balance. Even tho he says this to me everytime and i dont listen he still keeps telling me.

Anyway, hes fat and hes ugly and he stinks and i dont like him. Thats all i have to say about that.

**novastepp** · 05-17-2007, 05:09 PM

here are too many threads on this subject...

**K.Biz** · 05-17-2007, 05:10 PM

Oh i can wait to see what this thread turns into

**Act of God** · 05-17-2007, 06:11 PM

I got one...

2 brothers, probably around 19-20 years old, workout at my gym. They are gotti boy hair sporting guidos on their first cycle. Their big "thing" is bench pressing. They do what I can only refer to as "1/4 reps". They'll load 335 on and do these ridiculously worthless movements and then jump up and look around.

Every once in a while they'll see me doing an exercise and run to it after I'm done and load up the heaviest weight I did and do it, 1/4 reps again.

I overheard them last week talking about cutting up for summer. Apparently their plan is just to do a lot of ****.

Awesome!

**Panzerfaust** · 05-17-2007, 06:15 PM

I'm not in the mood for this shit..i'm afraid i'll blow a ****ing gasket if i start venting right now..

**thetank** · 05-17-2007, 06:34 PM

that tippy dude reminds me of my dad a bit..hell of a guy, a hero of mine no doubt..but when i first started working out, he dished out some pearls of wisdom that even then i knew where balogny..like when he insisted i start with 2 cans of beans, then move onto free weights when i was ready.

**Mike Dura** · 05-17-2007, 06:39 PM

LMAO. You see so many characters in the gym. I've gotten an earful from "advice givers" too and I wonder what world they're in. To give advice to someone who has clearly excelled you implies that some of us just may be out of touch. There was this other guy who I like who thinks he's "an instrument of God" and he claims to have special powers. I told him my knee hurts and he automatically started doing this ritual.....look into my eyes, and we had a stare down (somehow I didn't crack up lau***ng). Then he smacks his hands together and puts both hands on my knees. At that point, I laughed and told him, "I never knew you felt that way big boy." I thought he would laugh but he look disapointed. I like the guy even though he's a little crazy. There was this other guy we used to call WWF. He's role by in his huge yellow hummer and he was totally buffed out but he had the face of a nerd and he wore glasses. He'd come with this blond chick who'd act as his cheerleader during the sets, slapping him in the ass and they'd give each other hi-fives and would look around to see who was watching. It seemed like a major performance in the WWF tag-team tradition. I see this black guy with dreads dancing around balarina style. You'd have to see this stuff yourself to appreciate it. Words can do it no justice.

Originally Posted by doolo

This thread should be fun and a good place to vent a bit. I dont wanna hear all this vegan mumbojumbo about just letting people be and not letting things bother you. Only good solid complaints and making fun of typical gym idiots please.

So theres this one dude in the gym we call "Tippy". Hes about 260 pure fat, 6'4" tall and prolly 40-50 yrs old. We call him tippy cause no matter what exercise your doing and no matter how amazing your physique is he will always come up to you and give you tips on how to work out.

His warm-up consists of lying down in the bench press position and rotating some 2lb dumbells. Then he throws 225lb on the bench does it a few times, takes about a 10 minute break walking around telling everyone how to workout. Then he puts 315lb on the bench press and does it about 2 times bouncing it off his chest like hes trying to cave it in. Then, another 10 minute break and some machine presses. Thats his workout, the only one ive ever seen him do.

Every single time i squat hes in there telling me to pick a spot on the roof and stare at it so i dont lose my balance. Even tho he says this to me everytime and i dont listen he still keeps telling me.

Anyway, hes fat and hes ugly and he stinks and i dont like him. Thats all i have to say about that.

**Mike Dura** · 05-17-2007, 06:41 PM

That's because it never tires. Characters never cease to amaze!
I'm glad we have them.

Originally Posted by novastepp

here are too many threads on this subject...

**CoreyTampa09** · 05-17-2007, 07:08 PM

Ok if you guys dont watch family guy you really wont understand this one.

But in the episode where Peter says "Well your eyes are too close together" - The guy replies "Well that may be so, but your not getting your pool" Then peter goes on to say, "I have to draw you".

-Well there is a guy at my gym WHOS EYES ARE TOO FAR APART! Like literally he looks like a hamerhead shark, like two people fused together gone wrong.

Sorry nothing wrong with him, but everytime I lift and hes there, my workout is ruined due to laughter.

**dece870717** · 05-17-2007, 07:13 PM

Lol some guys said something pretty funny in the gym today. Guys talking to his friend "well we did bench yesterday, we should do some traps today" friend response "who cares its the same damn thing".

**Mike Dura** · 05-17-2007, 07:14 PM

When I'm on the tread mill, I notice alot of people have flat asses. Even worse, high-set flat asses. It's amusing. I want to spank each one I see.

Originally Posted by CoreyTampa09

Ok if you guys dont watch family guy you really wont understand this one.

But in the episode where Peter says "Well your eyes are too close together" - The guy replies "Well that may be so, but your not getting your pool" Then peter goes on to say, "I have to draw you".

-Well there is a guy at my gym WHOS EYES ARE TOO FAR APART! Like literally he looks like a hamerhead shark, like two people fused together gone wrong.

Sorry nothing wrong with him, but everytime I lift and hes there, my workout is ruined due to laughter.

**Lexed** · 05-17-2007, 07:19 PM

I have this one old guy in my gym WHO sweats like a crazy mofo and then dosnt wipe after himself, Im scared to talk to him that dude looks sick in the head

**Mike Dura** · 05-17-2007, 07:20 PM

That's me bro!

Originally Posted by Lexed

I have this one old guy in my gym WHO sweats like a crazy mofo and then dosnt wipe after himself, Im scared to talk to him that dude looks sick in the head

**Lexed** · 05-17-2007, 07:22 PM

well then since its over the internet and you cant kill me and my family can you please wipe after yourself

**doolo** · 05-17-2007, 09:33 PM

I just thought of another. This dude warms up with heavy squats every day. Can we say knee blowout or maybe a herniated disk? :P Heavy squats for him is 225 tho but still i think thats kinda dangerous. I make sure im sweating my bag off before i squat.

**scottish** · 05-17-2007, 09:42 PM

I just like all the pretty boys, with their wife beater shirts on, or sleeves cut off. Walking around with their arms so far off their sides, you would think they are waiting for lift off.

**doolo** · 05-17-2007, 10:04 PM

the luggage they are carrying must be heavy

**D-Bo Dre** · 05-17-2007, 10:34 PM

Originally Posted by doolo

This thread should be fun and a good place to vent a bit. I dont wanna hear all this vegan mumbojumbo about just letting people be and not letting things bother you. Only good solid complaints and making fun of typical gym idiots please.

So theres this one dude in the gym we call "Tippy". Hes about 260 pure fat, 6'4" tall and prolly 40-50 yrs old. We call him tippy cause no matter what exercise your doing and no matter how amazing your physique is he will always come up to you and give you tips on how to work out.

His warm-up consists of lying down in the bench press position and rotating some 2lb dumbells. Then he throws 225lb on the bench does it a few times, takes about a 10 minute break walking around telling everyone how to workout. Then he puts 315lb on the bench press and does it about 2 times bouncing it off his chest like hes trying to cave it in. Then, another 10 minute break and some machine presses. Thats his workout, the only one ive ever seen him do.

Every single time i squat hes in there telling me to pick a spot on the roof and stare at it so i dont lose my balance. Even tho he says this to me everytime and i dont listen he still keeps telling me.

Anyway, hes fat and hes ugly and he stinks and i dont like him. Thats all i have to say about that.

I think every gym has at least one "tippy".. what u have to do is make the meanest, angriest face possible while working out.. if he approaches u again just start foaming from the mouth.. I bet he will never approach u again..

**D-Bo Dre** · 05-17-2007, 10:47 PM

I got one to share... There is this old guy who works out in the morning.. He wears the tightest, nut huggin, bicycle shorts ive ever seen.. I swear if he sneezes his left nut will make an appearance.. Thats not the worse of it though.. His prefered exercise... LEG LIFTS!!

I crack up everytime i see him..

**beezlebubb666** · 05-17-2007, 11:22 PM

this guy in my gym wears these spandex shorts not biker shorts but the ones wrestlers wear.. and to make it even worse he has one normal sized leg and one that looks like a baby leg.. hes always in the corner doing handstand pushups.. and a bunch of other weirdo nonsence

**Titleist** · 05-17-2007, 11:58 PM

Originally Posted by D-Bo Dre

I got one to share... There is this old guy who works out in the morning.. He wears the tightest, nut huggin, bicycle shorts ive ever seen.. I swear if he sneezes his left nut will make an appearance.. Thats not the worse of it though.. His prefered exercise... LEG LIFTS!!

I crack up everytime i see him..

HAHAHAHA!!

That's hillarious.

**boxer08** · 05-18-2007, 03:48 AM

Theres was a boy that came to the gym, he walked in put 40kg on the bar i think it was his first time training, took it off went down then out of knowhere "or shit help im stuck help" at first i thought he was messing about so did my mates so we were lau***ng but then realised he wernt so my mate ran over and took he bar off him, i continued to laugh anyway as i thought it was funny but i guess we all have to start somwhere.

**Shane35aa** · 05-18-2007, 10:05 AM

Originally Posted by D-Bo Dre

I think every gym has at least one "tippy".. what u have to do is make the meanest, angriest face possible while working out.. if he approaches u again just start foaming from the mouth.. I bet he will never approach u again..

Chewing on a couple of Alka Seltzers makes the foaming at mouth alot easier