'Official Postwhore Thread'

[Dukkit]

Yeah, I'm not like a rich jewish girl. I work hard, I just don't like it. I've worked since iono 12, started my own landscaping business, worked in kitchens, exterior painting, auto detailing, oil change tech, so I've had shitty jobs and know what its like to work. Even still now, I referb real estate to make money.

What were you locked up for? charges?

i wasnt implying that your like a rich jewish chick. lol. im can tell you work hard from talkin to ya.

hmm what was i locked up for... well alot of stuff. i got caught selling coke. then i also got a simple assault. about 30 counts of terroristic threats. access device fraud (using someone elses credit card) then i also got a burglary charge ( i was going to my ex's house to get my belongings. and she was in a bad mood so she called the cops) but they dropped the latter to a trespassing charge. just a bunch of B.S. these all happened like back in 04. ive been a good boy since

[Kratos]

terroristic threats lol?
I had a bad 5 finger discount phase of my life, I stole some pretty sweet stuff and never got caught.
Have used someone else's cc before, he dropped it, I used it.
doesn't seem like anything too bad.

I had a 2nd degree assault but a good lawyer.

[Dukkit]

yea. apparantly if you just tell someone you want to f#ck them up. they can press charges. i.e. terroristic threats. lol. Bullshit.


haha. i know some ppl that had 5 finger problems also. and most of the time they got away with it.

yea i could never afford a lawyer. thats why i did 17 months. lol. but the good that came out of it, i dont regret it. i got over my coke addicition. and got into health and fitness. so its all gravy!!

[uncgboro]

good job on kickin the power to the curb. it is evil stuff i know i had my share of it but i used to love to snort heroin, bout killed me. Like you i found the gym, among other things.

[Dukkit]

good job on kickin the power to the curb. it is evil stuff i know i had my share of it but i used to love to snort heroin, bout killed me. Like you i found the gym, among other things.

thanks bro. glad to hear that your all good too. and i love the avatar!! is that your body??

[Kratos]

wtf did you do for 17months? look at the walls? I was going crazy in the short time I spent there. I have to say though, some of the prision humor was hilarious.

[Dukkit]

haha. i read... alot!! about a novel or 2 a day. uh. i wrote alot of letters to ppl. then you talk with your celly. pretty much tell them all about you. tell stories from your life. then you can talk to other ppl and hear some pretty ****ed up and funny things. the one place i was locked up at, you could buy little tvs and watch them. so we did that. you go to yard and run. you go to the weight room and workout. you sleep. thats it.

[Kratos]

I couldn't believe the gaurds told us who the child molestors were. I thought that was just something from the movies. "I just want all you guys to know, this guy here is in for child molesting." while where all in a big cell. I was like wtf.

[Kratos]

I wasn't in long enough to get a cell, you need to be there for like 2 weeks first, so I didn't have a celly, or books, or a tv.

[Dukkit]

yea they do that. they want them to get messed up.

[uncgboro]

thanks bro. glad to hear that your all good too. and i love the avatar!! is that your body??

Yea, thats me! Last summer, i was burnt from though. I am 160-165 in that pic and i weigh 178 now, but the abs aren't all there! LOL. its cool cause im bulking.

[Dukkit]

looking good bro. im sure you look more massive with that extra 10+ lbs on your frame. yea my abs are diminishing from bulking also.

[Dukkit]

i see kratos lurking.

[Peducho0113]

hello Bros, how is your day going? It have been raing all day here so mine sucks..

[Edgar]

I hear that in canada they only do it doggy style so they can both watch hockey!!!!

[Peducho0113]

I hear that in canada they only do it doggy style so they can both watch hockey!!!!

I always Knew it.. LOL

[Dukkit]

Whoooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Edgar]

a father on his death bed talks to his 3 children. tells his 2 sons and only daughter to put a hundred in his pocket at the funeral, so incase he can take it with em. the first son walks up to his father who is in the cascket and puts in the $100, here you go dad says the first son, second son walks up looks at his brother, looks at his dad, puts the $100 in his pocket and moves along, the little sister walks up and puts a check for $300 and takes the $200 dollars!

[Edgar]

Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.

The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'

[Peducho0113]

Funny Joke edgar.

[Peducho0113]

Whoooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Edgar]

Last Day on the Job
It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.

At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.

The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee.

She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door, and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.

When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast, eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh squeezed orange juice.

When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee.

As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge. "All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you."

He said, "**** him, give him a dollar."

The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

[Edgar]

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

[Edgar]

Funny Joke edgar.

thank you thank you very much!!

[Kratos]

last joke was the best, invasion of the butthole is always funny

[JDMSilviaSpecR]

Good afternoon whores

[numbat]

Good afternoon to you. WhOrE

[DSM4Life]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrqiIjLGnCI

[Deltasaurus]

thata was good funny joke we need more of em

[Kratos]

haha, I'm talking about the size of my dick with a girl I know on aim, she's gonna measure for me

[DSM4Life]

i heard the word d!ck...

[Kratos]

she's convinced my size 13's mean a big penis

[Kratos]

I'm not here to disagree with the girl, we need to investigate

[DSM4Life]

I'm not here to disagree with the girl, we need to investigate

[Kratos]

magnifiying glass not needed lol

[SMCengineer]

^^your right, tweezers work just fine

[WEBB]

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Thats a good one...

last joke was the best, invasion of the butthole is always funny

cant go wrong with a good sodomy joke...

i heard the word d!ck...

and you come running eh....

^^your right, tweezers work just fine

hahaha PWNED....

[inky-e]

Buenas noche putas del post!

[FREAK]

was up bro's

[FREAK]

hmmmm nothin i guess