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  1. #1
    Amorphic's Avatar
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    Got home to quite the scene tonight...

    so i got a call from my sister telling me that my dad is all disoriented and cant remember his name, talking gibberish and totally out of whack. paramedics are giving him oxygen and whatnot and hes off to the er now. (hes 53)

    he had melanoma a year ago so im assuming his cancer has either spread to his brain or something else is going on. he was complaining of headaches for the past few weeks apparently but didnt go to the doc. his dad died of alzheimers last year too so he might have that.

    quite the scene though i have to say.

    Im kind of indifferent to it all since hes been an asshole to me for most of my life, i almost feel guilty that its not overly bothering me but maybe some of you other guys can relate to shitty parenting haha. anyways, just figured i'd post this up, maybe you guys might have some guesses as to what happened to him.

  2. #2
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    I'm sorry to hear about your dad and even tho you two haven't had the best relationship he is still your dad. I would recommend he see his doctor asap. I had a similar situation when my mother had cancer a few years back and we didn't get along either.

  3. #3
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    Low Blood Sugar comes to mind....seizure, brain condition, insulin shock. No telling really, those symptoms could be caused by a number of things.
    ***No source checks!!!***

  4. #4
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    Sorry to hear that bro, let us know what they say.

  5. #5
    Amorphic's Avatar
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    i think im going to be doomed to dying in my 50s at this rate. genetically grandfather has alzheimers, dad has cancer, his brother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and has a year to live, so im assuming im either going to somehow end up with cancer or alzheimers sometime down the road.

    damn family genetics.

    thanks for the kind words bros.

  6. #6
    Indymuscleguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amorphic View Post
    i think im going to be doomed to dying in my 50s at this rate. genetically grandfather has alzheimers, dad has cancer, his brother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and has a year to live, so im assuming im either going to somehow end up with cancer or alzheimers sometime down the road.

    damn family genetics.

    thanks for the kind words bros.
    We've got a lot in common!!

  7. #7
    Indymuscleguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amorphic View Post
    so i got a call from my sister telling me that my dad is all disoriented and cant remember his name, talking gibberish and totally out of whack. paramedics are giving him oxygen and whatnot and hes off to the er now. (hes 53)

    he had melanoma a year ago so im assuming his cancer has either spread to his brain or something else is going on. he was complaining of headaches for the past few weeks apparently but didnt go to the doc. his dad died of alzheimers last year too so he might have that.

    quite the scene though i have to say.

    Im kind of indifferent to it all since hes been an asshole to me for most of my life, i almost feel guilty that its not overly bothering me but maybe some of you other guys can relate to shitty parenting haha. anyways, just figured i'd post this up, maybe you guys might have some guesses as to what happened to him.

    If and IF you take him to the ER...ask for an MRI not a CT of the head...insist on an MRI. There is a big difference when viewing the two, if they suspect metastatic disease to the brain. Good luck...

  8. #8
    Amorphic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Indymuscleguy View Post
    We've got a lot in common!!
    better live hard while we can hey!

  9. #9
    Amorphic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Indymuscleguy View Post
    If and IF you take him to the ER...ask for an MRI not a CT of the head...insist on an MRI. There is a big difference when viewing the two, if they suspect metastatic disease to the brain. Good luck...
    the ambulance took him already, i wont know whats up until i get a call from sister or mom.

  10. #10
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    Morph bro weather you two were close or not buddy try to spend as much time as you can with him until he either get's better or pass's away....


    I understand that ya'll had problems and did not get along or whatever but he is your dad and this may be the last time you get to see him....Suck up your pride and go and see him, tell him you love him and if he does pass at least he will pass knowing that regardless of if you two got along or not, that you cared....


    At least that way if he does die he can die thinking you care weather you do or don't....You can always tell yourself after it's all done and over with that it was a wasted trip and you regret going but if you don't you could very well end up regretting it for they rest of your life....


    Do your Dad and yourself a favor, go see him let him know you care and if he does pass away at least he will pass in peace....


    Rough spot your in buddy hope all works out well for you and yours....

  11. #11
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    well hopefully he will be okay.

  12. #12
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    Sorry for you man,,,, i think i know how you feel. I hated my old man (still do) and when he died i didn;t even go to the planting. My mother on the other hand was great, when she left i never really got over all the things i had never said to her. I lost my brother too, all this happened when i was 18, i don't miss my brother (i nearly choked him to death one time anyhow) or my father, but i do miss my mother... Good luck with it...What ever you decide to do....
    Last edited by Older lifter; 12-10-2008 at 09:42 PM.

  13. #13
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    I'm sorry to hear that my friend..I can't offer a guess cause I didn't go to medical school...but I will give offer up to you what happened with my Dad. 5 1/2 years ago my Dad was taken to the ER..pretty much similar circumstances..disoriented..but my Dad had slurred speach too...londg story short..the ER..****ed up...didn't diagnose him right away...gave him improper treatment and my Dad died shortly after..in the hospital...my relationship with him was a difficult one to say the least...in retrospect I take responsibilty for being a bad son...alot of you guys know my story...drugs ..alcohol..questionable background to say the least...I cost my Dad many hundreds of thousands of dollars in lawyers and ..also greasing judges palms...you could do that back then...my Dad was not affectionate..never gave me any encouragement or praise when I was a youth..and as an adult he made my life a living hell at times..he said hurtful things to me..even in front of my children..I hated him for that and even wished him dead many times... ...when he was on his deathbed and still concious...I made amends to him..pretty much told him I was sorry for being a bad son...let me tell ya...when he died..I guess I didn't grieve properly...IDK..I had so many mixed emotions...but I will tell you this...I wish he was alive today...on any given day..actually even earlier today I got to thinking of him and broke down and cried...he never got to see me get fit..turn my life around..and be a good man like I am today....so..although I don't know the specifics of your resentments with your Pops...just try to understand we all have defects..some more than others..and if you are saying that alzheimers runs in the family..don't doubt that his treatment of you may have been influenced by an unstable mind...whatever the case Brother..don't fukk up because of pride and ego...you don't wanna live the rest of your life in regret...trust me..I have so many regrets that sometimes it overwhelmes me...and if you think parenting is easy...let me tell you ..its NOT!!...I've made lots of mistakes with my kids..they are 25..19 and 15 years old....its still a learning process...I hope that you can find a way to forgive your Dad..cause after all...he is you only Dad..(I think)...You've always been a good friend to me here..and know that I'm here for you too.

  14. #14
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    Sorry to hear the news bro.. I posted almost a year ago about my close friend that passed away and I still am in shock at the kind responses I got from this board. I am glad yall rally around a brother in need.. Anyways hope all is well

  15. #15
    Kale is offline ~ Vet~ I like Thai Girls
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    Quote Originally Posted by HORSE View Post
    Morph bro weather you two were close or not buddy try to spend as much time as you can with him until he either get's better or pass's away....


    I understand that ya'll had problems and did not get along or whatever but he is your dad and this may be the last time you get to see him....Suck up your pride and go and see him, tell him you love him and if he does pass at least he will pass knowing that regardless of if you two got along or not, that you cared....


    At least that way if he does die he can die thinking you care weather you do or don't....You can always tell yourself after it's all done and over with that it was a wasted trip and you regret going but if you don't you could very well end up regretting it for they rest of your life....


    Do your Dad and yourself a favor, go see him let him know you care and if he does pass away at least he will pass in peace....


    Rough spot your in buddy hope all works out well for you and yours....
    Very wise words from my close friend Horse. Morph you have to suck it up and do what you can for him. I am 53 as well so I can speak from experience here. My father left me and my Mom when I was 12. I was 45 before I finally forgave him. He used to beat her up and shit like that but even then I decided I should give him a call one day. He lived in another country so it was a bit harder but I am really glad I did it for both him and me. Now we are the best of friends. You got nothing to lose here bro and everything to gain.

  16. #16
    Kale is offline ~ Vet~ I like Thai Girls
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    Quote Originally Posted by PKMann51 View Post
    Sorry to hear the news bro.. I posted almost a year ago about my close friend that passed away and I still am in shock at the kind responses I got from this board. I am glad yall rally around a brother in need.. Anyways hope all is well
    Dude were those good or bad responses.? I am sorry for your loss as well

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by HORSE View Post
    Morph bro weather you two were close or not buddy try to spend as much time as you can with him until he either get's better or pass's away....


    I understand that ya'll had problems and did not get along or whatever but he is your dad and this may be the last time you get to see him....Suck up your pride and go and see him, tell him you love him and if he does pass at least he will pass knowing that regardless of if you two got along or not, that you cared....


    At least that way if he does die he can die thinking you care weather you do or don't....You can always tell yourself after it's all done and over with that it was a wasted trip and you regret going but if you don't you could very well end up regretting it for they rest of your life....


    Do your Dad and yourself a favor, go see him let him know you care and if he does pass away at least he will pass in peace....


    Rough spot your in buddy hope all works out well for you and yours....
    I dont pretend to know what feelings you have for your father but i wanted to bump this, my father treated me fairly well but in my early years i had to witness alot of domestic violence against my mother which lead to a love hate relationship with my father in alot of ways anyway he past away with cancer about 2 years ago and it was just me and him when this happened as i was taking care of him and now i am proud that i did that but there was still many things left unsaid and i do regret that.

  18. #18
    PKMann51's Avatar
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    they were very good responses just like the ones in here. sorry for confusion..

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amorphic View Post
    so i got a call from my sister telling me that my dad is all disoriented and cant remember his name, talking gibberish and totally out of whack. paramedics are giving him oxygen and whatnot and hes off to the er now. (hes 53)

    he had melanoma a year ago so im assuming his cancer has either spread to his brain or something else is going on. he was complaining of headaches for the past few weeks apparently but didnt go to the doc. his dad died of alzheimers last year too so he might have that.

    quite the scene though i have to say.

    Im kind of indifferent to it all since hes been an asshole to me for most of my life, i almost feel guilty that its not overly bothering me but maybe some of you other guys can relate to shitty parenting haha. anyways, just figured i'd post this up, maybe you guys might have some guesses as to what happened to him.
    I understand your situation. It doesn't make you a sh*tty person. My dad is pretty much the same way. I know since he's blood and all, I will be somewhat affected, but I won't be losing sleep over it.

  20. #20
    Amorphic's Avatar
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    just got the call from my mom, results of his brain scan.

    2 large brain tumors. probably inoperable. he'll be flying out to another bigger hospital for chemo very soon. pretty crazy.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amorphic View Post
    just got the call from my mom, results of his brain scan.

    2 large brain tumors. probably inoperable. he'll be flying out to another bigger hospital for chemo very soon. pretty crazy.
    Thats bad news dude and I know how scary, my daughter died from a BT when she was just three and a half. I hope this works out for the best for both of you

  22. #22
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    Last edited by xlxBigSexyxlx; 12-11-2008 at 12:37 AM.

  23. #23
    Kale is offline ~ Vet~ I like Thai Girls
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    Quote Originally Posted by xlxBigSexyxlx View Post
    What is that ? It says the video isnt available in my country (Singapore)

  24. #24
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    On a serious note though, I agree with HORSE.

    You should def go see him

    Hope everything works out ok

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amorphic View Post
    just got the call from my mom, results of his brain scan.

    2 large brain tumors. probably inoperable. he'll be flying out to another bigger hospital for chemo very soon. pretty crazy.
    man, my brother just had a brain tumor removed and is dealing with chemo and everything. Its really sad.

    I'm sorry. Go see him. Make peace.

  27. #27
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    i agree, even though you dont care for him in a special way, he still brought you into this world and should pay respect

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amorphic View Post
    i think im going to be doomed to dying in my 50s at this rate. genetically grandfather has alzheimers, dad has cancer, his brother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and has a year to live, so im assuming im either going to somehow end up with cancer or alzheimers sometime down the road.

    damn family genetics.

    thanks for the kind words bros.
    dont assume bad things are going to happen to you man. negative expectation corresponds with behavior that fosters that expectation into a reality. live healthy, get check ups every few months, just stay on top of your health...genetics arent everything.
    im sorry to hear about your dad man thats terrible. what i can say, is if you can find the strength to bury what needs to be buried and be there for your old man now, do it.
    forgiveness is something you rarely regret bro.

  29. #29
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    sorry about your situation man. my father passed away from cancer a few years ago and had we not gotten the chance to say the things that needed to be said, i would not have been able to handle it. my father looked at it as a blessing. he was able to get his affairs in order, get right with God and make his peace with his loved ones. there are so many people who dont get that opportunity. take advantage of it. you wont regret it.

  30. #30
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    Amorphic, sorry to hear about this... I just lost my dad a few months ago for similar stuff cancer that got in the brain... Lot's of good advice on here, specially horse, inky, and kale on this subject with their detail on relationships.

    All I can say is ditto everyones response... know that you did the best you can to do what is right and that's all you got in your heart... those are the things that will change you for the rest of your life. strive to be and do the best you can in all you do!

    It's just like inky said, let your dad know that you don't judge him for anything and that will be good enough. peace bro!

  31. #31
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    Amorphic, my friend I hope your dad feels ok and I understand that your relationship with your dad wasnt good. But all I got to say he is your dad you should go and see him that doesnt necessary means that you have to like him but cause he is ur dad. My dad of Cancer one week after I came back from visiting him and till the rest of my life I will regret that I wasnt by his side when he died. My relationship with my dad was really good espicially in the last 6 yrs of his life. Bro go visit him thats all I can say and good luck to ur dad My prayers go out for him.

  32. #32
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    So sorry. Alot of us have found ourselves in your shoes. Don't feel bad about the feelings of disconnection with your pops, somethings never heal. I hate to hear about anyone suffering the pains of cancer. My aunt has cancer right now and it is really hard on families. I will send a shout out to the big man upstairs on behalf of your family.
    Last edited by youngNhungry; 12-11-2008 at 10:06 AM.

  33. #33
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    Very sorry to hear this brother......Should you consider helping him though, you should look up whether or not there are any hospitals in Canada who are using GammaKnife, it works well on 'inoperable' tumors...He has one of the most aggressive forms of cancer...

  34. #34
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    Sorry to hear the diagnosis bro, like many on here have said I would go to him and make peace and do whatever i could to take of him and spend some time with him that way you always know you did what you could and you will have know regrets.

  35. #35
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    Inky you're story touched me. It great to hear you doing well now, hopefully you can appreciate life and the people that love you and want to see u succeed more.

  36. #36
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    Wow man....
    my grandpa died recently from pancreatic cancer, it was relatively agressive and fast.

    its your choice whether you go see him, i can understand the hell parents put people through. Im terribly sorry to hear that about your dad.
    Just take a deep breath and go see him a few times, even though he was a complete asshole to you, would you preffere him dead than alive?
    sometimes just the support of a loved one can save some ones life.

    they told me my great aunty had a few weeks left, so we got all of the family together and had a big feast in her honor and she ended up recovering and living another 5 years.

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